Star Wars

Struggle with Darkness

Chapter 1

"Let me go Onasi!!!" the Jedi struggled with all his might as the solider pulled him away from the closing blast doors. On the other side, a young woman of twenty-four years was battling with all her being to keep back the grey-skinned, yellow eyed Sith that as assailing her. As the two battled the doors closed and the Jedi's cyan eyes widened as the sight of his beloved vanished from view.

"Bastila!!!!!!"

It was like his soul was torn asunder. Nothing could have possibly prepared him for this. A truth he could not accept and the loss of the one person that gave his life meaning, it was almost too much to bear.

"There's nothing we can do Drake" Carth the republic war hero shouted at him "She can't beat Malak by herself…we can only help her if we're alive and searching for the Star Forge…now let's go!!!!" Carth let him go and sprinted away towards the hanger.

Drake felt a tear slip from his eye as he stared at the blast doors. Mustering all of his strength he tore his gaze away and followed Carth towards the hanger determined not to look back.

He could feel his loathing for himself beginning to surface. Despite all of his power, all of his skill and all of his supposed potential, he couldn't protect her, though he'd sworn to both himself and her that he would.

He ran onboard the Ebon Hawk and closed the ramp. He felt the ship lift up out of the hanger bay and into open space. Hearing the alert he pelted towards the gun turrets despite his conflicting state of mind as Sith fighters approached.

The Sith fighters were no match for his eagle eyed aim. Soon all of them had fallen and the ship flew into Hyperspace. Drake began slowly coming down the ladder as the crew gathered in the main hold. Giving a silent pray for strength he entered the hold, receiving looks from the entire crew.

"Where is Bastila?!" Jolee asked as he entered "What happened on that ship?" Drake didn't answer he was far too conflicted now. He barely heard Carth reply.

"We ran into Malak…he would've killed us but Bastila sacrificed herself so we could get away…" the crew all look horrified.

"You mean she's…" Mission Vao the Twi'lik street urchin from Taris began "She's dead?"

Drake couldn't bear to hear those words. Out of exhaustion, grief and a feeling of sickness, he moved over to the chairs and sat down ignoring the looks he got from the crew.

Who was he? That was the question he repeatedly asked himself. Was he a twenty-five year old commando for the Republic, a member of the Jedi Order, or was he Darth Revan, the singularly most powerful Sith Lord to date?

"Bah! Malak won't kill her don't be foolish" Jolee replied. "Malak will want to convert her to the Dark Side and use her battle meditation against the Republic, so the Sith will always be victorious"

Drake felt his gut clench in hatred and rage at the sound of Malak's name. Yes this is what Malak would do, and now there was nothing he could do about it.

"We need to go back for her…" Drake muttered. The entire crew nodded in silent agreement. Well all except one.

"Not so fast…" Carth sighed, "We have a bigger issue to deal with…" Drake felt his anger grow once again as he slowly looked towards Carth with an extremely predatory like glare filled with malice "Are you going to tell them or will I?" the crew frowned collectively.

"So is this more important than finding Bastila to you Carth?" Drake snarled. It was taking all of his self-control to prevent himself from hurling Carth into the wall behind him.

"Yes it is…" Carth folded his arms. Drake's anger took physical shape in the form of a bolt of electricity crackled up his body. The whole crew jumped upon seeing this, and looked between them confused.

Falcan, the bounty hunter who had joined them on Tatooine stepped forward. He was wearing his signature dark red trench coat along a black-scaled shirt and leather trousers.

"What are you talking about?" he inquired. Drake sighed trying to calm himself. No matter how angry he was with Carth, he knew that he had to be careful. He took a deep breath relaxing breath, well at least as relaxing as he could make it.

"So do I tell them or do you?" Carth asked again. Though he put on a brave face, he realised how close he was to pushing Drake's button. Drake was on a very short fuse and Carth was trying not to light that fuse.

"Since it's what you want to see Onasi…I'll tell them" Drake sighed and looked round the gathered crew. Jolee Bindo, Juhani, Mission Vao, Zaalbar, Hk-47, Canderous Ordo, Falcan and T3-M4. He would now place his fate in their hands.

"I am Darth Revan…" it was like a sudden wave of death had hit the universe. The ship went silent. Mission, Juhani, Zaalbar and Canderous all reeled in shock. Falcan himself looked shocked though he hid it well behind his usual calm mask.

Now it begins… Drake thought Bastila hold for me…

"What?" Mission exclaimed "Darth Revan?! Is this some sort of joke?" she looked at Drake for some form of affirmation that he wasn't Revan.

"No it's no joke…" Carth replied bitterly "the Jedi captured Revan and erased the Dark Lord's mind, creating a new identity, Saul Karath told me on the Leviathan and Bastila confirmed it" Carth was staring hard at the younger man in front of him who had his head lowered.

"You're Darth Revan?" Mission said, "This…this is big, do you remember anything about being Revan?" Drake thought.

"No…I don't remember anything" Drake swallowed, he wanted this over with so he could find Bastila. Force knew what Malak would do to her in order to turn her.

"Let the lies begin" Carth breathed.

Drake cracked his neck as his head turned to look piercingly and menacingly at Carth. His rage was starting to boil once again. Now his hand was drifting awfully close to his lightsaber and he was literally fighting his urge to skewer the solider, who he knew was only trying to provoke him. But then Bastila drifted once more into his mind and he felt his anger dissipate once again.

"You must have remembered something when Malak told you the truth…" Carth pressed on, unaware of the very dangerous water he was trending in "Maybe a few flashes, but there was something"

"Just a few flashes…nothing else?" Mission repeated, "Well then there isn't anything to worry about" Carth's eyes looked at her in shock "It seems to me if you don't remember anything about Revan, then it doesn't matter…all that matters is who you are now" Mission smiled at the former Dark Lord who couldn't help but smile back.

"Of course it still matters!!!" Carth interrupted fiercely "how do we know his memorise won't suddenly return and he'll turn on us?" Carth stopped as he saw the looks he was getting from the crew. He had little or no support whatsoever and he knew it "All this time we've been chasing Malak and we've had his former master right here listening to our plans!"

"Hey Carth…" Falcan spoke silencing the solider "It's pretty obvious to me that only you seem to be at all troubled by the fact he's Revan…and just because of his past actions" Falcan slid past Mission to place his hand on the shoulder of his fellow Deralian.

"Now Carth…I think Drake has got a lot on his mind" Falcan emphasised the Jedi's programmed name "…and his patience with you is wearing thin already…Bastila is gone and your pathetic rambling isn't helping matters…so do us all a huge favour and don't piss him off anymore"

Carth began to open a fiery response on Falcan but stopped when Drake looked at him. The gaze was intense, his cyan eyes almost glowing like hellfire and they bored into Carth.

"He's right Carth…" the ship fell silent as Drake spoke. "Who I am does not matter, Malak has taken Bastila from me…and right now I don't care what you think of me" Carth gulped as Drake stood up from his seat still gazing intensely at him and the crew held it's breath.

"I don't care what or who stands in my way…I will rip the entire Sith fleet apart if I have to in order to get her back…I want to stop Malak as much as you but my priority is Bastila" Mission smiled and placed her hand on his shoulder.

"I don't see the dark lord standing here…I see a friend who has stood by us through thick and thin…" Mission looked at Drake and then back to Carth

(I agree with Mission) Zaalbar added in crossing his arms over his chest (I swore a life debt to who you are not who you were) Mission looked at her wookie friend.

"Big Z and I will stick by you…we owe you our lives and we won't abandon you yet" Drake smiled but Carth still would not go down easily.

"How can you say that Mission?" Carth yelled defiantly " The Sith armada bombed my plant into submission! Revan stole my life from me!" Drake glared but Canderous stepped in at this point.

"Everyone knows it was Malak who ordered the attack on your people Carth…you can't blame Revan for that" Carth sighed.

"Well I suppose you've proven yourself so far… Revan" Carth admitted "But how can I trust you? How can any of us?" before Drake could reply Falcan stepped up.

"Bastila loved him didn't she Carth?" Drake looked round at the bounty hunter in shock "if she could fall in love with him, knowing who he was…then surely the rest of us can trust him" Falcan turned to look at Drake.

"You and I are both Deralians Revan…but you're also my friend and your actions prove it…" Falcan held out his arm "You've saved my life countless times…and now I hope to return the favour …brother…" Drake smirked and they gripped forearms in a typical Deralian gesture.

"Canderous what about you?" Drake asked turning to the mandalorian.

"You defeated the mandalorian clans during the war Revan" Canderous answered "You were the only one in the galaxy were able to match us…how can you even ask if I will follow you?" Canderous smirked and held out his hand.

"Whatever your fighting…I will be worthy of my skill…I'm your man until the end Revan no matter how this plays out…" they shook hands and Drake nodded.

One by one he asked the crew if they believed in him. All of them gave affirmatives; all of them gave him their trust. Hk-47 furthermore confirmed he was in fact Revan's droid and thus his loyalty to Revan was absolute. After receiving his friends trust he turned back to Carth.

"Do you believe me now Carth?" Carth sighed, looking dejected but contented with the answers he'd heard.

"Well the others seem to trust you" Carth replied "and I don't see any other way to stop the Sith…and I suppose Malak is the real enemy here anyway…so I don't really have a choice"

"Carth…I won't let you down"

"I want to be believe you" Carth said "you've proven yourself time and time again…but this is a little much for me to wrap my mind around"

Drake scoffed "How do you think I feel?" his voice was wrapped in seriousness and iciness.

"This must be more of a shock to you" Carth answered, " I don't know how you can keep going" Carth paused "Don't worry I won't allow my personal feelings to get in the way but I have sworn an oath to protect the Republic and under no circumstance will I allow you to betray the Republic…"
Carth sighed and looked away, wanting all the poisonous words exchanged earlier to disappear. "Well I guess that's it then…we still have one star map to find and we need to find Bastila before it's too late…" Drake nodded and the party departed the main hold as the Ebon Hawk headed for Korriban.

Later on Drake was lying in the barracks that he and Bastila had shared, during their time together. They had never done anything, but lie together and allow the other to explore their mind.

This was the hardest thing he'd ever been through. Fighting Calo Nord was nothing compared to this: duelling Darth Bandon had been a walk in the park in comparison to this. Living without Bastila.

Drake finally allowed his tears to fall silently. It had become too much for him to bear. He stood up and walked round the barracks as his silent tears continued to fall. Drake suddenly shot his fist into the wall with a loud bong. He sighed and pulled away his fist seeing the blood on his knuckles.

Drake slid down the wall and sat on the floor. He slowly fell into a fitful slumber, with only one thing on his mind. Bastila his angel and his princess.

His beloved…