Author: Amethyst Hunter
Fandom/pairing: Get Backers, Akabane/Ban
Rating: R (mentions of adult content/innuendo, language)
Warnings/Spoilers: See above.
Word count: 2590
Notes: Based on a fic prompt for the springkink LJ community. Prompt: "Forced orgasm – Realize things unfold in its due time."
Disclaimer: I don't own GB.
Summary: Ban learns the hard way why displeasing Akabane has certain interesting, albeit unpleasant, consequences.
He just couldn't catch a break.
The job was set, the players were in place, the money was practically in their hands – and then poof. The Fuckup Fairy decided to pay him a little visit, in the form of one extremely inconvenient phone call.
"Akabane," Ban said, keeping his voice low and as calm as possible while he paced the corner of the room he'd taken temporary refuge in. "I really don't have time for this right now. This is the fifth time you've called in a half-hour!"
"I understand that, Midou-kun," purred the voice on the other end of the line. "But I'm afraid you still owe me. And today, I will collect on that debt."
"The one that I'm repaying for your standing me up for our date last weekend."
"Oh for – " Ban ground his teeth and smiled as ingratiatingly as he could for his partner and the would-be clients they were wooing over lunch. They all sat at the table, giving him somewhat questioning glances. "I told you it was an emergency! Can't we talk about this later?"
"Now is as good a time as any, I think," his lover replied archly. "Unlike some people, I don't consider abandoning one's mate in favor of driving across town to purchase cigarettes an emergency."
"It was an emergency! Nicotine withdrawal is a serious ailment – oh, what the hell am I saying this to you for?" Ban slapped his forehead and caught the clients raising their eyebrows at him. He flashed them another reassuring grin. "I gotta go now before Ginji eats all the breadsticks. We'll discuss it when I come home."
"If you come home," Akabane said. "Look across the street."
Scowling, Ban went over to the window and peered through the curtains. He scanned the sidewalks and nearby buildings, and – there was a man standing in the window of a hotel room, dressed in black with a big hat, smiling and waving to him with a hand full of scalpels, all pointed directly at him.
Soft laughter bubbled warmly in his ear. "I think it would be very unwise if you were to hang up on me while I'm speaking to you, hmm?" Akabane said.
A thousand curses ran through Ban's mind, along with colorful and descriptive ideas of what the transporter could do to himself in Ban's absence. He restrained himself from mentioning any of them. Handling a jilted Jackal required some degree of tact and delicacy if he wanted to preserve important body parts.
Ban took a slow, deep breath. "I am sorry I stood you up. I am sorry I didn't call to let you know I'd be late. I promise I will make it up to you somehow. Now can we please, just cut the crap and let me get on with my business here? You can lecture me all you want on the importance of punctuality as soon as I get home and I'll even let you throw in some sanctimonious discourse about my smoking. Okay?"
I will not Snakebite my boyfriend. I will not Snakebite my boyfriend. Ban gripped the phone's casing in his hand so hard he thought he heard cracking plastic. "And what?"
"The blood on your shirt when you did come home," Akabane prompted.
I will NOT Snakebite my boyfriend. "You saw that?" Ban asked as he cast another look at the clients. They weren't looking in his direction – this time. But their expressions were growing increasingly impatient. Ginji mouthed a question at him and pointed to his wrist – what's the hold-up?
Akabane sighed. "Midou-kun, which one of us does the laundry in our household? Of course I saw it." His tone shifted into subtle annoyance. "And I didn't appreciate being lied to when I asked you why your shirt had been damaged."
Ban pinched the bridge of his nose, almost losing his glasses in the process. "I didn't lie. I told you it got torn because I bumped into somebody."
"You didn't just 'bump' into someone, you got into a fight with them. A fight, I might add, that you were supposed to have had with me." Akabane was definitely sulking now.
Ban's teeth were clenched so hard he could feel the strain in his neck. He raked a hand through his hair as he paced faster. "Okay, okay, okay!" he hissed. "The damn monkey-trainer happened to be at the same store where I got my smokes. He shot off his corn-grinder like he always does and I had to dust his ass a few rounds. Trust me, it's not like he didn't deserve it! You'da done the same thing if you'd been there."
"Perhaps," Akabane sniffed. "Certainly, if it wasn't for the fact that Fuyuki-san is Ginji-kun's friend I daresay I would exercise less consideration. However, that still doesn't change the fact that you had blood on your shirt!"
Oh for the love of Mary Joseph Christ graham-cracker-crunch – The clients were looking at him again, and one of them was frowning. They mumbled something between themselves. As for Ginji, his nose was buried in the appetizers.
Ban closed his eyes against the headache building in the center of his temple. "That was his blood, not mine! Dammit, Jackal, I gotta go! These old-fart moneybags are waiting for me – "
"Let them wait," Akabane declared imperiously. "I'm not finished – don't you hang up on me, Midou Ban-kun!"
Ban's hand froze in the act of lowering his cell phone's lid. He settled for squeezing the damn thing in his hand, still open, while stomping his feet on the floor and growling garbled snarls of swear words under his breath, a few of which were reserved for the restaurant patrons who gave him odd or disgusted looks as they passed by.
Tantrum vented, Ban put the phone to his ear again. "You know what? I don't care. Fling a few knives at me if you want. I'll even give you a free shot." He went over to the window again and yanked the curtains wide open. "There you go, easy mark, Dr. Jackass. Now piss off and don't bother me while I'm in the middle of important business!"
"You'd enjoy that, wouldn't you, Midou-kun?" Akabane replied. "But your clients might not…"
"Look out the window again, darling."
Ban did. Akabane was gone – no, there he was, standing in a different room…that happened to be directly across from the same spot as the clients' table.
"I'm telling you, it's NOT MY BLOOD!" he roared, flipping off the diners that had paused to gape at him. The clients were both frowning now, the grooves in their lined foreheads almost as deep as the Grand Canyon. Ginji was staring at him like he'd sprouted a second head.
"Are you sure about that?" Akabane said. "I know people in certain places that can run tests on the stains to determine whether it's your blood, or someone's from a certain beast-using clan…" He hesitated. "Midou-kun? What's that noise?"
Ban added a few more dents to the wall with his forehead before picking up the phone again. "Fine. You win. The fucker got in a lucky punch."
Akabane made a measured sound of satisfaction. "I thought so. Now, was that so terribly hard to admit?"
I will not Snakebite my boyfriend, but I WILL beat the everliving hell out of his skinny ass. "Don't see why it's such a big deal," Ban snorted. "It's not like we can't get together any other time."
"Yes, but that particular time would have been so much fun," Akabane said in a gentler tone. "I was very disappointed when you didn't show, Midou-kun. I had done my best to set up the perfect intimate evening for us. There was red wine chilling in the refrigerator."
Ban barely caught the tail end of that sentence because he was wildly gesturing at Ginji to get the pissed clients to stay put. They finally relented, and he turned his attention back to Akabane. "I said I was sorry, okay? You're being a very bad boy right now, Jackal."
"You can spank me later," was the purring response. "Where was I? Ah, it was to have been just the two of us, with nothing to interrupt us in the middle of our amusement. Not even that hat or coat of mine that I know you find bothersome. Well, maybe just the coat. I had a big surprise in my pocket especially for you."
Ban's left leg froze in the act of marching back to the table. He turned his back to the dining room and quietly growled into the receiver. "You wanna run that by me again?"
A little chuckle, wicked in its playfulness, tickled his senses. "Oh, nothing. I was just saying how eagerly I was waiting for you to come to me so that we could indulge our mutual pleasures."
Ban licked his lips, feeling a bead of moisture trickle irritatingly between his shoulder blades. Damn all uncomfortable starched suits. "I meant…the part about you and – "
"I'd made your favorite pizza for you, thick, delicious crust dripping with hot, moist sauce and cheese, and all the toppings just the way you like it." A breathy sigh, and then, "And after dinner, I was going to give you a nice, relaxing massage in warm bathwater and do that thing with my fingers that you like so much while I kissed every glorious inch of your – "
"Ak-kabane," Ban croaked, jumping behind the potted plant so no one would see the immediate effect the transporter's erotic litany had on him. "Are you trying to ruin me?!"
"Oh Midou-kun, you know I'd never do that," murmured that silky, sadistic voice. "I was just so unbearably bored without you around. I don't like for my hands to stay idle long. So I had to find other means of entertainment…aside from letter-writing, that is."
"…other means…?" Ban absently watched the irate clients, in spite of Ginji's panicky protests, begin packing up their briefcases as his mind conjured an image of a pale-skinned, dark-haired man with eyes as seductive as the violet sunset writhing naked upon a large bed, his hands flexing and pumping between his splayed legs.
The smile curled off of Akabane's lips and slithered through the phone into Ban's ear, down his spine and into his groin. "I was saving a special treat for us," the transporter all but whispered. "I found some whipped cream for our dessert."
"Fuck – me – sideways," Ban groaned, clutching the edge of the plant's pot like a lifeline. He wondered if it would be too heavy to carry back to the table, then decided he'd be better off yanking one of the pictures from the walls. He'd make up some bullshit about having recognized the artist and wanting to point it out to impress the clients.
Assuming they were still there, that was. He peered around the corner. They were getting up. He leaned just enough away from the plant so that they could see only his upper body, and waved frantically at them. After several huffs and grunts, they conceded and sank into their chairs, giving him a clear warning look that it was now or never.
"Mmmmmm. Now who's being naughty, issuing such bold invitations, Midou-kun? Mmm, I'm getting excited just thinking about that night all over again. Ahhh, what you'd do to me in our struggles…" A zipper slowly rasped apart. "A good thing I wear gloves so I don't get dirty on the job, hmm?"
I will screw my sexy, psychotic, son of a bitch boyfriend into next week. "Hold on, wait – you're not gonna start the party without me, are you?" Ban demanded, irked by the idea. He deserved a consolation prize for all this misery and playing with only oneself for company wasn't it. He searched the window once more, but the transporter was nowhere to be seen.
"Mmmm." A crisp rustle of fabric preempted Akabane's croon. "Well, you're not here right now, are you? It's so hard for me, waiting so long for some enjoyment - "
"Oh yeah?" A fast look at the dining room revealed an empty table. Well, fuck 'em. No, fuck Akabane..! "Stay there. I'll be up in five – no, two minutes." A thought occurred to Ban. "That hotel has room service, right? Tell them we want a big can of whipped cream sent up pronto. We'll improvise for the cuffs." He could tie a good strong knot, even with sheets.
"Ah, ahh. Not so fast, dearest."
"Don't 'ah-ahh' me, Kuroudo! You started this and you're gonna finish me off, one way or another!"
Akabane's rich chuckle seemed to last forever. "Ordinarily I wouldn't complain. But you have a job to complete first, don't you?"
"Retrievers always carry out their missions to the very end, and the Get Backers have a one-hundred-percent success rate, don't they? It wouldn't be very professional if you were to surrender to your lustful desires and run out on your clients just for personal pleasures…would it?"
Strangling whimpers scratched their way out of Ban's throat. The clients were shaking off a pleading Ginji and heading for the restaurant's main doors. "Aka-ba-neeee..!"
"All good things come in due time to those who wait, Midou-kun. Business before pleasure, after all. I heard through the grapevine that Wan-san is considering cutting you off from his coffee shop again if he doesn't receive some payment soon for your overdue tab. Oh well," Akabane chirped. "We can talk about all of this later. Good-bye, Midou-kun!"
"I'll see you at home, my love!" Click.
The hostess jumped when a potted plant near her exploded into a cloud of dirt and smashed clay. "Excuse me, sir! I'm going to have to ask you to leave if you can't – sir! Sir!"
Ban was too busy weaving through a maze of tables and people to pay her any mind. He chased the route he'd seen Ginji take and finally caught his partner standing like a dope in the middle of the street. Cars blared at them and Ban dragged the both of them back to the sidewalk.
"Where are they?!"
Ginji gave him a blank look as he loosened the tie his partner had just choked him with. "They left," he said, pointing at a limousine that was pulling away from the opposite curbside. "Ban-chan, what's going on?"
"Never MIND! Get in the car, we gotta stop them! I'll – oh, NOW what the hell does he want?!" Ban screamed as the phone in his pocket jingled. "Jackal, you bastard, I'm gonna blister your ass – "
"I don't want to know about your love life, Ban," a female voice cut in. "I just had a question – "
"Cork it, Himiko! Now is NOT the time!"
"Fine! I'll remember that the next time the Get Backers need my services," she snapped. "I'm glad I'm spending the weekend with Akabane and not you, if you're going to be such a – "
Ban blinked. "What was that? Since when are you spending the weekend with him?!"
"Since as of tonight we got called for a job that's going to last several days," Himiko shot back. "Didn't he tell you?"
"Ban? Ban? Are you there? Ban! Answer me!"
Ginji picked up the phone that his friend had dropped and carefully stepped over the quivering, muttering wreck on the sidewalk. "Hi, Himiko-chan!"
"Ginji?! What are you doing there?"
"Himiko-chan, um, can I ask you something?"
"What are 'blue balls'..?"