A/N: I do not own Harry Potter and would not particularly care to. I would like a rental agreement with option to buy for Hermione Granger. A short-term contract with Nymphadora Tonks would not be turned down. A Long-term agreement with Luna Lovegood would probably be a whole lot of fun. Any time Padma Patil wants to open negotiations, call me and oh for a weekend with Fleur. Oddly Lavender and Padma's sister (despite being her twin) Parvati do nothing for me…


One day Ron and Harry were in Diagon alley, standing outside Quality Quidditch Supplies discussing the relative merits of the latest broom models when a distinguished older gentleman approached them.

"Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?" he asked.

The two Hogwarts graduates just stared at him.

"Excusez-moi, parlez vous Francais?" the older wizard tried.

His only reward was vacant stares from the pair

"Parlate Italiano?"

Still no response.

"Hablan ustedes Espanol?" he tried et again Still nothing.

The older wizard stomps off, swearing in a language that neither Ron or Harry understands.

"You know Ron," Harry said after a few moments. "Maybe we should learn another language."

"Why?" Ron asked, clearly perplexed. "That guy knew four languages, and it didn't do him any good."