Real Author's Note:

So there's a parody challenge over at theboothexpress, and I couldn't resist writing a response for it. I've deliberately kept it short in order to minimize pain. Read it at your own risk.

Please note this isn't how I normally write. This is all for the purpose of parody. All errors and abuses of the English language are deliberate. Forgive me.

If you're unsure about the definition of a parody, here it is: "A literary or artistic work that imitates the characteristic style of an author or a work for comic effect or ridicule."

Every last word that follows this sentence is a part of the parody.


Revelations: A Parody

Author's Note:

I suck at summaries. Bones may be slightly OOC. My first time ritting a story plz b nice. If I don't get reviews, there will be no updatings.

Taking place during Allens in a SPaceshp

Bones' cerulean orbs welled with tears that spilled down her alabaster cheeks as she stared down at the page before her. Time and oxygen were running out, but like Hodgings, she had someone she needed to say goodbye to.

She began to sang, ignoring the strange looks Hodgen's was gave to her.

And I don't know how
I can get in touch with you
Now there's only one thing
for me to do, that's to
To get home to you

Blinking, she took the pen in her hand and begins to write. Out of nowehere, the right words came to her as a rush of emotion uncoiled in belly and washed over her skin, leaving her shivering.

Dearest Selly,

Before I met you, I didn't believe in love. Anthropologically speaking, monogamy, and indeed, marriage, are recent human inventions. But what was once just an oppressive, archaic institution, suddenly holds an undeniable appeal. Listening to Hodgins proclaim his love for Angela has forced me to see my own truth. As I sit here and take stock of my life, what I regret most is not having been with you.

With the specter of death looming before me, I am forced to imagine the future you and I will never have. I will never have the chance to feel your tongue probe the hot, wet depths of my mouth and engage in that ancient mating dance until both of us are gasping for air. I will never have the chance to wear the white dress of shantung and tulle that Angela chose for me the week after you and I first became partners, and be lead down the aisle toward you by my father. I will never have the chance to get fat with your twins after we make love for the first time against the wall and you call me Temperance, and I make you buy me pickles and ice cream and Thai food in the middle of the night and massage my swollen ankles.

Silly, from the moment I looked into your soft, warm, chocolate brown Labrador Retriver eyes, I knew you were my soulmate, my destiny, an Angel sent down to me by God Himself, and all those other things I never dreamed I'd believe in. It turns out all I needed to be whole was a good man like you. Without you, I'm nothing.

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance

All my love, xoxoxo,
Temprance

P.S.
I have been cuttting myself for weeks now. It helps relive the pain I felt knowing that you and CAm were satisfying your biolOgIcaL urjes together. We hates her.

-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-

Want more? You know what you've gotta do. Clicky the little button.