Hello! Look a one shot! I love these! So here you go!

Disclaimer: … NO …

Bi, Gay, Asexual, or Straight?

"Did you hear?" Ino whispered as she stalked into the classroom. She had a purple halter, white skinny jeans, and purple flip-flops.

"What?" Tenten skateboarded in. She had a form-fitting pink shirt that 'YOU SUCK!' says in shiny pink bold letters, some green guy cargo shorts and awesome pink-n-green camo etnies.

Sakura rolled her green eyes and sighed. "Ino…" Sakura had a yellow form-fitting shirt with three black stripes at the bottom, black capris and some black and yellow DC shoes.

"THERE'S A NEW KID IN OUR CLASS!" Ino jumped up and down, her bouncy blonde hair was whacking people as she passed. "OW!" "DAMMIT INO!" She ignored them.

"Uh I-Ino-s-san! Y-you just hu-hurt some-someone!" Hinata said worried. She had on a blue shirt with a gray sweater on top, jean capris and black VANS.

"I really don't think she cares…" Tenten pointed out, "She wouldn't notice even if it was a hot guy, probably."

"HOT GUY? WHERE!" Ino shouted turning around. Her accursed long hair slapped more people.

"Uh… Ino-pig?" Sakura mumbled.



"Jeez, Forehead, you are so loud!"

"Look who's talking."

"T-tenten-sa-san! Th-that wa-was m-mean!"


Their teacher who was ALWAYS late just waltzed into the classroom. Early. WHAT THE HELL?!?!

"K-KA-KAKASHI-SENSEI?!?!" Another blonde yelled out. Naruto was freaking out! Half of the students weren't even here yet! It's only been like five minutes!

"Yo." It was a simple replied from the unfazed sensei. He really didn't care, as long as he got paid for teaching these dumb ass kids.

"Why are you h-here so e-early?!?!" Naruto was confused and pointing his finger at Kakashi wildly.

" 'Cause I'm always early!" Kakashi chirped. He popped out his orange "graphic novel." Indeed it 'twas a very "graphic" novel.

"Pervert." Sakura mumbled accusingly. She would hit her teacher over the head but she would get in trouble so… she didn't.

"What's the real reason?" A kid named Neji asked. His long hair rivaled Ino's. They were equally long, shiny, smooth, and girly. LOLZ.

"We have a new student."

Tenten was looking longingly at Neji, she batted her brown eyelashes. "OH! Tenten and Neji lying in the bed, F-U-C-K-I-N-G! First comes love- OW! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?" Ino shouted/sang. Tenten had thrown her pretty shoe at Ino's pretty head.

"Shut up or I'll tell Shikamaru you think he's hot when his hair is down-!" Tenten hissed, her mouth was covered by Ino's manicured hand.

"FINE! PLEASE don't tell!"


Sakura leaned to Hinata and whispered, "This is funny."

"I-indeed." Hinata giggled.


"Anyway… The new boy's name is-?" Kakashi started.

"OH! A BOY!"


Random comments like these were passed across the room.

"His name is Uchiha Sasuke."

As if on cue said boy lazily walked into the room. "HE LOOKS LIKE A BASTARD!" Naruto shouted.


"MARRY ME!" another one…

Okay it was the whole class…

"Sasuke sit wherever you think is safe." Kakashi chuckled.

Sasuke sighed. Every school was like this. Why? Why had God made him such a sexy, irresistible bastard?

He scanned the room. There was only one spot that looked comfortable. Between a pink-headed girl who was looking out the window, and the blindingly-dressed-up-in-orange boy who called him a "bastard."

He walked up to that and ignored the pleas of the girls practically selling themselves to him. Screw them, he believed in L O V E! Awww, how cute of Sasuke.

He sat down and the room was filled with complaints. Kakashi just sat down and continued to read his so-called "novel."

This is boring… Will I actually learn in this class? Sasuke thought leaning his head on his hand, tapping his pencil.


While Sasuke was scanning the classroom Ino and Sakura were talking….

"Screw Sai. This Sasuke-guy is hotter than that artsy rebel!" Ino whispered loudly.

"Sure. They both look so cold."

"All they need is a hot girl like me to warm them up!"

"Ino-pig, you're a freak."

"A beautiful freak."

"Who is utterly shameless to hot guys."

"I'm sorry I am the one who actually has eyes looking for a guy!"

"What the hell are you talking about? Tenten is obviously hitting on Neji and we all know that Hinata has this thing for Naruto! WHAT NOW!"

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Don't you like anybody?"


"Well… I'll help you Forehead, I dare you to ask Sasuke if he's bi, gay, asexual, or straight!" Ino giggled at her semi-ingenious plan.

"How the hell is that supposed to help me? And what makes you think he's gay?"

"Look at all the girls throwing themselves at him! He isn't even caring! I now it will help you! I've had experience with these kind of guys." Ino nodded.

"Ooooooohhhhhhhhh… Experience? With who, Lazy-ass Shikamaru? Or did you really do it with Sai?" Sakura smirked sneakily.

"No! That's not what I meant!"

"Yeah, right."

"Oh! Look he's coming the dare's still on!"


"Can I sit with you?" The Sasuke boy asked. He was standing straight, and from Sakura's sitting point, he looked like a freaking tall monster.

"Sure." Sakura smiled and let him sit between her and the hyperactive blonde boy. As soon as he was settled down he asked her a question.

"Will I actually learn in this class?" His voice sounded like he really didn't care though.

"Yeah… Somehow with the homework he gives us… We all pass this class, even the blonde idiots." She referred to Ino and Naruto.

There was a moment's silence until he spoke again… "I'm sorry but why is your hair pink?" her hair is bothering me!

Sakura closed her eyes and sighed, "I was named Sakura because my hair is pink. And, no, I did not color dye it."

"Well you should because it's annoying, and so damn blinding!"

"I'm sorry it bothers you…" What's his name again?

"Sasuke. Uchiha Sasuke."

"Well I'm sorry, Sasuke. It's my hair. Live with it. By the way I'm Haruno Sakura."

"Hn. Change it you look like a freak."

"Why do you care again?" Sakura was getting pissed.

"I guess it looks lesbian."

"WHAT! WELL YOU LOOK GAY!" The class was listening in right now.

"At least I can't get pregnant." Calm… that is the way to go at a time like this.

"HA! You just gave me proof that you are indeed gay." Sakura crossed her arms and smiled.

He scowled. "You thought I was gay?"

"I know this is mean but are you: bi, gay, asexual, or straight?"

Neji choked. This is never how you ask a guy that. Especially not in front of the whole damned class.

Ino laughed. It's working!

Tenten and Hinata covered each other's mouths to stop themselves from laughing.

Naruto was laughing his ass off.

Kakashi was smirking under his gay mask.

Shikamaru woke up from his nap and smirked, this is better than watching Temari and Ino fight over him.

"I am S-T-R-A-I-G-H-T." He spelled it out.

"Prove it."


The bell rang. Sakura cursed. She just wanted to get this dare over with.

As she walked to her next class Neji walked up to her. "That was some show you put up there at Kakashi's."

"Sure." Sakura laughed uneasily. Th-they heard that? LOL you are screwed.

Neji walked off. Sakura had no friends in this class, except for Naruto. He was usually in the classes she had that nobody else has. For example, their next class… Orochimaru.

They walked in. Naruto sat in the inside, Sakura in the middle and a familiar form sat next to her. "Sas-Sasu-uke?"

"Hn. What?"

"Y-you're stitting next t-to me?"

"Yeah. What about it?"

"I thought you'd be mad at me."


"I said in front of the class that you were gay."

"Well I'm not-?"

"And who is this fine young man with an awesome body, Sakura-chan?" Their gay sensei asked. Orochimaru let his tongue hang out and licked his lips.

"This is Uchiha Sasuke."

"So would you like to stay after class with me?" Orochimaru leaned over the desk and showed some manly cleavage.

"No. And why does everyone think I'm gay?" Sasuke deepened his everlasting (or so it seemed) scowl and sighed.

"Because most pretty boys go gay." Sakura whispered, "I'm sorry to break it to you."


Somewhere Neji sneezed. "My pretty boy senses are tingling."

Somewhere Sai perked up, "Did someone say Gay Show? Yes I am!"


"That's a load of shit." Naruto butted in.

"Says you." Sasuke retorted.

"So you believe me?" Sakura batted her eyelashes fakely and smiled. "So answer the question Uchiha, Are you bi, gay, asexual, or straight?"

Sasuke sighed. This was going to be a very, very long day. Fuck. Fuck it all.


So for the whole day Sakura and Sasuke found out they had all the same classes and they became friends (I guess) and Sakura kept asking her awkward question… and Sasuke is know fed up with it.

They are in front of the whole school now. "Come on Sasuke… Give me some proof."

"Like what?" Damn, Sakura, why is she so persistent? This is a gay waste of time, is what he thinks.

"Kiss a girl or guy, I just want to see the truth."


Sasuke grabbed a very surprised Sakura by the waist and brought her head close, "I'm damn straight." He kissed her fully on the lips, and he might have slipped his tongue in. They broke apart, her head was leaning on his chest and his chin was on her back, "Is this good enough proof?"

Sakura smiled, "That was plenty. Thanks for the kiss!" Sakura smiled. He blushed.

Ino smiled. "Told forehead it would help her get a guy." She went back to making out with Shikamaru. "Now to start with Neji and Tenten."

Ino the matchmaker. She never loses.

Sasuke and Sakura walked home hand-in-hand smiling like lovers should. This was a very eventful first day for Sasuke. Hoo-ray!

So how was that? I dunno I thought of this a while ago, and it wouldn't shut up in my head, so deal with it!

Love me and my bitchy self,


Review because I love you.