Okay, so I sick over the weekend and in my sick mind I thought of this little gem of a story. Its only purpose is to be a funny little story, so enjoy!
Summary: Rory decides to kill Dean because of his hair... no it was his attitude... no, maybe it WAS his hair. Oh wait, it was just cause she was bored (The cable was out. What else what she supposed to do?)
"Oh Dean, I never did like you" Rory started, twirling a knife in her hand. She was at Luke's Diner. "I don't know if it was you hair, or your attitude, or maybe it was just your face"
"Hey! I do take offense to that. I happen to know my hair is brilliant!" Dean retorted
"That's what you think," Jess said. "Your hair is just so... floppy. Really, it's all about the gel"
"Hells yeah!" Rory chimed in.
"Whatever. So, why am I tied up?" Dean questioned.
"Rory!" Lorelai yelped
"You didn't tell him?" Luke asked.
"Umm..." Rory shifted her stance "It never came up"
"That's cold" Taylor added
"Sorry!" Rory said.
"Wait! What's going on?"
"Oh, Rory is gonna kill you." Lane said simply.
"Hey! Don't you get angry at my precious offspring. The cable is out, what else is she supposed to do?" Lorelai said
"Well, I guess that's true" Dean agreed
"See, it's nothing personal Dean, there's just nothing else to do"
"So..." Jess said "Is this thing gonna get started soon? Because I made reservations at a restaurant for us Rory"
"Awwww..." Rory cooed. "Your so sweet"
"Yeah, I know"
Rory left her position in front of Dean, and went over to Jess to give him a kiss.
"Um, hello?" Dean said
"Oh, sorry! I totally forgot about you" Rory said, blushing.
Just then, Kirk came running through the doors of the diner. "Did I miss it? Oh sweet Jesus, tell me I didn't miss it" Kirk glanced over to see a very alive Dean, and simmered down."Oh good, the floppy haired idiot is still alive"
"My hair isn't floppy!" Dean yelled.
The whole town replied, "Yes it is"
"So, how are you gonna kill him" Miss Patty inquired
"I don't know. I was thinking I was just gonna stab him. I'm kind of tired"
The towns people moaned.
"Come on darling! I canceled Dance Class for this, and trust me those dance students need all the practice they can get"
"Okay, then what do you guys suggest we do?"
"We could hang him!"
"Nah, that's how we killed Logan"
"No, that's how we killed Jason" Lorelai said
Lorelai smiled "That's how we killed Max"
Luke joined in "I've got it!"
Luke quickly went to the kitchen, and retrieved two frying pans.
"You want me to..." Rory trailed off.
"Hit him with the frying pan till he dies. Duh!" Lorelai said.
"God, your such a genius" Luke said
"Yeah, I know"
"Uncle Luke" Rory whined, "I'm really tired though"
"Silly Rory, that why I brought two. Jess is gonna help you" Luke said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world
"Cool!" Jess said, getting up. "I never get to help!"
"Aw man" Dean whined "This is gonna hurt. Can't you just poison me? It would be a whole lot easier"
"And a whole lot less fun!" Lane shouted.
"Sorry Dean, you're getting killed by a frying pan" Luke said.
"Well, let's get this started" Jess said.
After the floppy haired idiot was killed, the town slowly filed out of Luke's.
"That was fun," Lorelai said
"Yeah, I liked the whole frying pan idea Luke" Jess commented.
"Yeah" Rory said. She looked at the dead Dean. "So, what are we gonna do with his body?"
"All I know is we can't use the lake" Lorelai started, "Taylor will kill us if we stuff another body down there"
"How about in front of Al's. We could burry him there" Jess suggested
"Oh, yeah. Good idea, Al hated Dean"
So, the four adults picked up Dead Dean and started off to Al's Pancake World.
Come on, press that silly little review button. My life is dull, I need entertainment