[Pairing: ItaKisaIta – I'm not sure where the dominance lies, really
I'm not sure whether this should be T or M, really. oO If you review (please do), then could you comment on the accuracy of the rating, please?
I don't own Naruto or any of its characters. Obvious, much?
Hoshigaki Kisame has never wanted to do anything that would displease Itachi-san. Nothing at all – Itachi-san is who he lives for; who he breathes for. In all technical matters, a scientist will tell him that he breathes air and for some reason can breathe under water. But Kisame would simply tell that same educated person that they are very much mistaken. Kisame cannot breathe without Itachi-san. It hurts without Itachi-san.
Uchiha Itachi-san, however, is a very complex individual. And Kisame sometimes does not know what to do for the best. He does not know what 'the best' is.
Hoshigaki Kisame knows that there is nothing more beautiful than the sight of his lover. He does not know where or when Itachi-san is most beautiful. When he sees Itachi-san waking up in the morning (in those fleeting glances before the younger man rushes to the bathroom to 'pretty himself up'), Kisame thinks that Itachi-san may perhaps be incorrect (even though Itachi-san is never incorrect) in thinking that he needs to tidy himself up even in the slightest. With ruffled hair and smudged make-up and bite-marks on his lips, neck, shoulders, collarbone, chest, ribs, stomach, waistline… Kisame cannot see one part of his lover that he would want to change – except for those awful bite-marks trailing their way down, tainting him.
Uchiha Itachi-san should never be tainted. It was only the first time that Kisame ever kissed the boy that he ever truly felt like a criminal – the murders (and worse) that he has committed do not bother him. He does not feel like he has ever committed a real crime except for tainting this angel of radiance and soot.
Hoshigaki Kisame knows - very well - one thing that he will never admit. It is nothing 'sappy' or love-filled. He knows that he utterly lusts after Itachi-san, but he will admit that freely. He knows that he is, quite probably, in love with Itachi-san, and he will admit that too, though quietly, and he does not know quite whether it is true or not. No, Kisame knows one terrible thing that he does not want to admit even to himself because he can't bring himself to think so lowly of the person he, unfortunately, loves. He can't admit it to himself but he knows it's true and, at the back of his mind, he repeats it to himself, slowly and painfully as if he were masochistic. Kisame is not masochistic and he is not sadistic - not towards the one that he is in love with.
Uchiha Itachi-san is a whore. That is the one thing that Kisame will never admit out loud. He can't hurt his lover further by saying that out loud. He wants so badly to call Itachi-san his boyfriend. He does not dare. The closest he will get is 'lover', though 'love' isn't involved at all despite the deceptive nature of the devious word. He can deceive himself, too, when he uses the word 'partner' and almost he almost smiles when he says it. But inside himself, he knows that there is only empty meaning to each word, frozen by an ice age that happened so long ago that it will never lift again. And Kisame does not want to admit it at all, but when his lover is underneath him, Kisame knows that Itachi-san will beg. Itachi-san begs to beg. He screams to scream out his partner's (Kisame can feel the echo in the hollow centre of the word) name.
Hoshigaki Kisame will never draw blood. He wants to. He wants to draw blood from the feminine boy, so young to have his skin coloured with such expensive red oil, and to see it cascade to the point of danger. He wants to hear screams of agony because he knows that ultimate pleasure will be entwined within those shrieks. Kisame does not want to hurt Itachi-san for his own pleasure. He does not want his misshapen teeth to dent the skin of his condemner, because his condemner is his saviour and it confuses him so terribly. He does not want to hurt Itachi-san because he is in love with the younger boy (Kisame does not know what this means, not entirely, but he thinks he has gotten it right this time. For the first time in his life he has gotten something right, and it is so terribly wrong).
Uchiha Itachi-san wants Kisame to make him moan and shout and scream. Itachi-san wants Kisame strong and unyielding, a torrent of pain and pleasure and expertise. He is in lust with the shark, not love. He has long since destroyed love. When he bled away the life of his family, any love he felt bled straight out with them. No love lingers within his little brother. Hatred became the poison that would disintegrate any remaining scraps. He has no love left to spare. He does not want to hear words with no meaning – only sounds coming from his own throat, with more meaning than a phrase could ever conjure. He wants to see his own ecstasy.
Hoshigake Kisame has only once refused Itachi-san. The most childlike excuse, 'I am afraid, Itachi-san' came from his lips, followed meaninglessly with, 'of hurting you.' It did not matter to either of them the cause of the gilled man's fear. Kisame had been afraid.
Uchiha Itachi-san had slapped him. And Kisame was grateful for the boy's mercy. A single moment of mangekyou would drive him insane. But Itachi-san had mercy. Kisame had been slapped, stabbed, kicked, spat on, cut, bled by his younger lover for his disobedience and when his blood fell from open wounds, Itachi-san screamed at him to let his love for him flow with it. Kisame did not understand. Kisame still does not understand. But he is grateful for the boy's mercy.
Can't you see that I'm not worth protecting? Are you really so blind?! How could you even pretend that you have no eyesight when my own is failing me?! How could you mock me like this, you ungrateful idiot! Why do you disobey me?! You have promised me, you havesworn to me that you would obey my every whim and to this day you have told me nothing but lies! Do as I command! Do as I command! Do as I fucking command you!
Hoshigaki Kisame will never disobey Itachi-san again. He is far too in love with the boy to disobey him any further. He will hurt him, if that is what the Uchiha desires.
Uchiha Itachi-san will never feel more than hatred for the shark. But only his partner can make him feel such ecstasy when Kisame finally gives obeys him and draws blood. Love flows from him until there is none left to give.
Kisame is in love with Itachi-san. He does not expect Itachi-san to love him.
Itachi is in love with Kisame. But he will wait patiently until it is all drained from him and he has none left to give, and he is no longer ill from that disease.