Hey, sorry for the VERY long wait. Work and school have been very demanding lately, and with my studies becoming more intense, it's very hard to update or to find the inspiration anymore. In appreciation of your patience, I am dividing the final chapter into two parts. It took me forever to write this! Enjoy!"
Frick on a stick with a brick!" I muttered under my breath. There was no sight of Janitor anywhere in the cafeteria. Just a bunch of doctors sitting around and eating their lunches.
We walked over to the coffee area, poured our cups of coffee, and went to the cashier. Carla immediately recognized him as one of Janitor's friends.
"Troy, have you seen Janitor?" she asked as she handed him a dollar twenty-five.
Troy, a man who would look like a biker if I saw him on the street, shook his head. "Nope, can't say I have," he said as he took Carla's money.
I remained silent as I handed Troy my money and sat down with Carla at one of the tables.
"We're never going to have any luck finding Janitor," I whined with a groan.
"Don't give up, Elliot," Carla reassured me, "We'll find Janitor."
Turk and J.D. plopped down next to us with some donuts on their trays.
"There you are!" Carla said to her husband, "Where have you been? Don't tell me you guys have been doing The World's Most Giant Doctor again."
"Relax, baby. I was in surgery until now," Turk said, picking up a jelly donut and taking a bite. "I heard you guys were looking for the Janitor."
"Why would you be looking for that Lurch?" asked J.D., looking frightened.
I forget the Janitor is J.D.'s tormentor. I smiled a tiny smile as I stirred my coffee.
"Because," Carla answered for me. "We just are."
They shrugged and continued to chomp on their donuts.
"I had to amputate a fourteen-year-old girl's leg today," Turk said as he chewed. "She was hit by a car. We had to kick The Todd out of the OR because he kept saying how hot she was."
"That's just gross," I said, wrinkling my nose. The Todd thought anyone or anything was hot. I heard he once thought broccoli was hot.
"They're suing the driver and they're already getting three million," J.D. pointed out. "She was hit by a Porsche, so the driver is very wealthy."
"Damn, she's set for life!" Turk said in awe. "She wouldn't have to get a job, ever! She'll be getting disability, anyway."
"Hmm, I wonder what life would be like if I had one leg and didn't have to work?" J.D. asked as he tilted his head to the side, obviously getting into one of his fantasies.
I rolled my eyes and stood up, while Carla did the same. The nerve of these guys. A girl had to get her leg cut off and all they can talk about is how much money she's going to get? They're not even caring about how hard that girl's life will be without one of her legs.
"We're going to drink our coffee elsewhere," I announced.
Turk waved to us with a donut in his hand while J.D. was still in his fantasy while Carla and I turned around and walked away. That was when I saw Janitor, entering the cafeteria. He saw me and smiled. I smiled back at him.
"There he is!" Carla whispered in a hissy-excited voice. "Go get him!"
I nodded. I began to walk over to him when suddenly, my pager went off. I took it out of my pocket and read it. "Frick!" I yelled and ran off. I was so disappointed because I finally found Janitor and then I get paged right then! It's like people are messing with us on purpose!
I sighed as I watched Elliot run out of the cafeteria. I just finally found her after I spent the whole morning looking for her. Lucky for me, I was already on my lunch break, so I could have wasted all the time I wanted without being yelled at by Kelso. I took the time to call the Brain Trust together for a meeting. I sat down at an empty table and sighed.
"Hello, Brain Trust captain!" said Doug as he put his tray of food down in front of me. "You called us in for a meeting?"
"I did," I said. "Where are Todd and Ted?"
"They'll be here in a minute," replied Doug, opening his green tea Vitamin Water.
Then, Todd pulled up a chair next to Doug. "Finally here five!" he said, slamming Doug's hand. He whimpered from the pain. Todd ignored it and snapped his fingers.
"Okay, Janitor," said Ted as he sat down next to me. "Sorry I'm late. I was at a disposition."
"For what?" asked Doug.
Ted paused for a long time. "There's no need to go into it," he answered. "So what's going on, Janitor?"
"I made the decision to tell Elliot how I feel about her," I began. "Unfortunately, we keep getting separated. It's like someone doesn't want us to be together."
"You like Elliot?" asked Todd, holding out his hand again. "Alright, Janitor getting booty five!"
I made a disgusted face. "Get help, Todd!" I said. I sighed. "I just worry that Elliot's not going to like me back. I don't know what I'd do if she didn't like me back,"
The three other men just sat there, silent. They had never heard me say something like that. I normally know what to do with anything, but love is a very complicated thing. I've had plenty of experiences with anger and revenge. Dorian was pretty good practice on that. But love was much different. When I was going to school, I couldn't ask any of the girls out because they were afraid of me. Well, at my height and with the angry expressions on my face, I didn't blame them. I do blame them for spreading rumors that I ate pigeons. I didn't eat them, I just stuffed them!
"Well, if you want, we can try to get Elliot in your direction," offered Ted, interrupting my thoughts.
"Can't you just page her?" asked Doug. "You do have a pager,"
"Yeah, but mine's busted. It broke when I collapsed. I forgot to get a new one," I replied, pulling my pager off my belt. I tried paging Elliot, but the screen just went blank. "Damn." I tossed my pager in the trash can next to me and crossed my arms.
"Ah, Janitor," said a voice.
I looked up and saw Kelso, standing there with a muffin in his right hand and a phony smile pasted on his face.
"Kelso," I said with a nod.
"It's good to see you back again," Kelso continued. "So how do you like that massage chair?"
I smiled. "It's like sitting on a cloud," I said happily. It came two days after I was released and I spent some time in it. I realized that I didn't like it as much as I thought I would, since it was mine. It was better when I just sat in one that wasn't mine. I figured I could turn it into one of my inventions.
"Good," Kelso said. "By the way, you need to do a spot mop by the elevators on the second floor once you get off your lunch. Too many gurneys make black marks! Patrick was a good janitor, but he wasted too much time talking to people,"
"I'm on it!" I said. I still think Patrick O'Neill was such a tool. I noticed that he did too good of a job, so that would probably make me look bad. I guess I'd have to work as hard as he did, but then slowly go back to my old routine of doing hardly anything.
Kelso walked off, grumbling to himself.
"Jackass," I muttered.
"Do you really think we can get Elliot to you before the day's over?" asked Ted.
"Relax, we're a team. There's no 'i' in team, is there?" asked Doug, putting his arm around Todd.
"These buns look good!" a woman yelled very loudly from another table. Todd's face brightened.
"Gotta go!" he said, standing up and walking over to the other table.
I shook my head. "Forget it. You guys are useless," I concluded as I stood up and left...
I was very disappointed and irritated when I had been paged. It stomped over to the ICU where a man was sitting in a bed while Dr. Cox stood next to the bed with a chart in his hands.
"Barbie, this is Mr. Steinmetz. He's from Germany with very little knowledge of English and since you have experience in babbling in that language, you can be his doctor!" Dr. Cox explained, thrusting the chart in my hands. "Enjoy,"
He walked off and I blew the bangs away from my face. I walked over to the patient, who had short blonde hair and an uneasy look on his face.
"Guten tag, Ich heisse Ärztin Reid," I introduced myself. "Wie geht es Ihnen?"
Mr. Steinmetz groaned. "Nicht besonders gut, Ärztin," he answered. "Ich habe mit dieser schrecklichen Schmerzen in meinem Magen,"
After a long look at his charts, it appeared to be an ulcer in his stomach, so I ordered a test for him. I sighed and left his room after I gave a nurse the test orders.
"Hey, found Janitor, yet?" asked Carla, catching up to me as I walked in the hallway.
"Ich habe ihn nicht gesehen," I answered thoughtlessly in German.
"Huh?" asked Carla.
"Oh, I'm sorry! I was still in German mode! Patient from Germany." I explained apologetically, then my tone saddening. "I said I haven't seen him. I'm afraid I'll never get a chance,"
"Don't say that, Elliot!" Carla said, "We always manage to come across Janitor every single day!"
"Just not today," I said glumly.
"You shouldn't be sad, Elliot," Carla continued, "Just be happy that Janitor is somewhere in this building and he's in several different places, not like how he was a few weeks ago."
I nodded. "I guess you're right," I said. It was better to have him so that I can't find him, rather than going into one of these bedrooms and finding him lying there attached to machines.
Half an hour after Carla and Elliot left, I was still engrossed in my fantasy of living life with one leg and not having to work when Carla and Elliot left the cafeteria.
"J.D.?" asked Turk.
"Huh?" I asked, snapping out of my fantasy.
Turk sighed. "What was happening in your fantasy?" he asked.
"Oh, I was imagining that I had a prosthetic leg that I could use to freak people out." I explained with a smile on my face. "Then I decided maybe I could have several sets of legs. I could use sexy girly legs to woo bouncers at nightclubs to get in."
Turk gave me a disturbed look. "That's just downright-"
"-Don't get started!" I interrupted and made a slashing motion in the air with my hands. "Nightclub bouncers LOVE sexy legs!"
"Yeah, but on sexy women!" Turk pointed out. "WOMEN!"
"So the rumors are true." said a voice. "Annabelle has truly expressed her desire to go from a little girl to a woman."
I turned around and found Dr. Cox holding a tray with a cup of tomato soup, a few packages of crackers, and a cup of coffee on it. He was giving me a sneer as he stood there.
"Sneer all you want, Perry!" I said. "You can't stop me from having prosthetic legs!"
"I can make that possible." said another voice.
I looked up and found the Janitor towering over me with a mop in his hands. "Let me cut off your legs and we've got a deal. I'll even make you the prosthetic legs!"
I screamed and ran out of the cafeteria. Who know what would happen if Janitor cut my legs off?
Flashes into fantasy...
I was lying in a bed in a dark, unknown place. I recognized it was Janitor's garage, because I saw an army of squirrels and live raccoons staring at me on the shelves.
"Good news, Dorian!" said Janitor, wearing his janitor uniform underneath a white labcoat (his Jan Itor uniform). "The operation was a complete success! Take a look at your new legs!"
I pulled away the blankets and saw that my legs were now Randall's short little legs!
I screamed in horror. "What did you do?" I yelled.
"Oh, I didn't tell you?" asked Janitor. "I gave you a transplant and switched yours and Randall's legs. Now Randall gets to be tall!"
Right then, Randall jumped in from the Janitor's right, grinning. He was a little bit shorter than the Janitor, but he was tall alright.
"Now I can punch people in the face!" he said gleefully. His fist came flying towards me when I heard a voice calling me.
I snapped out of my fantasy and saw Dr. Cox glaring at me.
"You done, yet?" he asked.
I looked down at my legs and saw that they were my normal sized legs. I breathed a sigh of relief. "No way, Janitor. You wouldn't give me prosthetic legs. You'd just switch them with Randall's."
Janitor gave me a funny look. "I was just joking, Dorian." he said. "And why would I switch your legs with Randall's?"
I just shook it off and went back to drinking my coffee...
To Be Continued