It's been a while I know, I'm really sorry I haven't updated in forever. I recently just finished high school, so I was busy with graduation and all that. Anyway I want to think all of you who have been reviewing and waiting so patiently for the next chapter. I appreciate the reviews a lot. So, enough of me rambling, go on, read the story.

Summaries

The computer lab is pitch dark, except for the glow of one computer. Ned is sitting in front of it, staring at the screen.

A whistling starts out of the room, and then grows into singing. Gordy jumps into the room picking at his mop like a guitar and shouting, "Because I'm bad, I'm bad, come on, You know, I'm bad, I'm bad, and the whole world has to answer right now to tell you one again who's-" He stops his solo in mid-note when he notices he's not alone. "Ned, what are you doing in here?" He asks, "I'm just about to lock up." Then he adds quickly, "you didn't happen to see any what I just did, did you?"

Ned looks up, smiling innocently, "you mean this?" He asks playing Gordy's dance sequence on his phone. "You were right, you are bad!" He laughs.

Gordy makes a lunge for the phone, "come on, delete that."

Ned shakes his head, "no, I think some one would like to see this first, like Crubs."

"You wouldn't!"

Ned just smiles.

"Alright," Gordy sighs, "what are your demands? Keys to the teacher's lounge? My year supply of spray cheese?"

"Tempting," Ned admits, "But right now I just need your help with something."

"What's that?"

Ned points to his computer screen, which is displaying the form you have to fill out before posting a new story. All the boxes are filled except one.

"No!" Gordy exclaims, "Please, anything but that!"

"Gordy, I want you to write me a (background: BUM, BUM, BUM!) Summary!"

Lightning strikes, thunder booms.

"Ned, you can't be serious! That's so diabolical!"

Ned shrugs, "That's my demand."

"Oh, alright, fine," Gordy sighs. He sits down in the seat next to Ned's, "Alright, I see here that your story is about Star wars, the main characters are Han and Luke, it's rated K+, and it's an action/adventure story. It's also called, ' Blaster Bolts'.

"Before I write the summary I need to know two things, what's going to happen, and is there a monster."

Ned gives him an odd stare, "Well, Luke and Han are going to go to a planet to look for a secret Empire holdout, there could be a monster..."

"O.K, check this out," Gordy's fingers began to flash across the keyboard keys, "Luke and Han are on a planet looking for an empire holdout, there could be a monster, I suck at summaries, read and review." He smiles at Ned.

Ned frowns, "Gordy, what is that?"

"It's a summary," the janitor mutters, "that's how I always write them."

Ned shakes his head, "That's not what I wanted at all! I wanted a summary that makes the reader what to click on my story!"

"If I was looking for a story about Han and Luke and maybe a monster," Gordy cut in, "I would click on it."

"I wouldn't!" Ned exclaimed, "Gordy the first thing anyone knows about summaries is NEVER to write the words, "I suck at summaries," in the summary!"

Gordy looks surprised, "Why not?"

"Because, if people are looking for a fic to read, and they see "I suck at summaries", than maybe they'll think that that's not the only thing you suck at. I mean if you can't write a summary that doesn't suck, can you write a story that doesn't?"

Gordy looked thoughtful, "I guess you have a point."

"Plus," Ned continued, "it uses up some of the 225 letters you're allowed to use on a summary. You need as many of those for the summary itself as you can."

"OK, well aside from the summary thing," Gordy continued, "the rest was pretty good."

"It's not bad," Ned allowed, "but it's not amazing either. I mean it doesn't grab your interest that well. It needs some pzazz, something to give it that wow effect."

" 'Pzazz', 'wow effect'?" Gordy wondered.

Ned gave an embarrassed smile, "he-he, my mom's been watching these decorating shows. But anyway you get the point, something that says 'hey all you little people out there, this story rocks, so you'd be smart to read it', you know?"

"Oh, gotchya, so, um, how about this? Han and Luke are searching a hostile planet for an Empire hideout, and they might not be alone. Read and review."

"Um, not bad, it's getting there."

Gordy scratched his chin, "how about you have a quote from the story? Or something?"

Ned nods, "it's a good idea, if you have a quote in your story that you know for sure will grab the reader's attention, it might be a good idea to use that."

"Do you have a super cool, suspenseful quote?" Gordy asked.

"Not really yet, my story's still in progress."

"Ah, um, how about a rhetorical question? Like 'Was the Empire destroyed, or is there a contingency? When rumors of a pocket of Imperial troops on a far off planet reach the federation, they send their two greatest heroes Han and Luke to find out. But when they arrive, our heroes find that their not t- Oops. Word limit."

"No, I like that last one best of all; we just have to shorten it to fit the word limit. Let's see, the start is amazing, but the middle's sort of wordy, hu... Um, how about 'Was the Empire destroyed, or is there a contingency? When rumors of a planet harboring a pocket of Imperial troops reach the federation, they send Han and Luke to investigate. But when they arrive, our heroes discover the planet holds a deep dark secret"

"Yes!" Gordy exclaims, "it makes the word limit, has pzazz, and if I was looking for a story about Luke, Han and a monster I would click it. But you don't have room for the read and review..."

Ned smiles, "You don't need it, Gordy. When a summary speaks for itself like that one, well, people will just click on it, read it, and review it without you having to ask!"

Ned turns to the camera, "So when it comes to writing a summary, remember these things: Never use the praise "I suck at Summaries" in a summary, or at all really. Next, remember the word limit, and stick to it, this is one of the most annoying parts of writing a summary, and can be especially tricky if you have to write something in the summary about what's inside as well, like "Spoiler" or "Noze", whatever that is. Also remember that quotes and rhetorical questions work good, pzazz and wow effect should be your main goals when writing a summary. Remember, the reader is going to base your story on whatever you write in that summary box, so no pressure."

"Wow," Gordy yawns, "well, it's late I'd better lock up, but first, you delete that video."

Ned smile gets an evil glint, "I don't know, Gordy, you're so good at summary ideas. Do you think you could help me think of a title?"

"No."

Ned clasps his hands and gives the puppy dog eyes, "please?"

"Nope."

"Pretty, pretty please?"

"No, Ned, now delete that file!"

"Pretty, pretty please, or I push this button and your video hits the web, and Crubs get's it emailed to him?"

Gordy frowns, "you're very evil,"

Ned smiles, "I know."