Disclaimer: I dont own Twilight nor the real book Thriteen Reasons in which I borrowed its title
"Bella," a soft voice whispered.
"Mhmm?" I mumbled back incoherently.
The voice answered, closer now, "It's time to wake up." I could feel the cool breath tickle my neck, like a feather it fluttered across my warm skin, sending a shiver down my body.
I couldn't help smile, but I didn't want to open my eyes yet, I was saving the best for last. "I'm still sleeping," I said back, burying my head farther into his stone chest, my fingers idly playing with the collar of his shirt.
He chuckled, even closer then before. I could feel his icy lips graze my forehead. "Would you be so kind as to open your eyes?"
"Why?" I mumbled back, still hiding my head in his chest as my face reddened and my heart raced, all due to his simple touch.
"I'd like to see my fiancée'seyes when I tell her that I love her."
My eyes flew open and my breath caught in my throat. I meet his topaz eyes, and tried to focus on them which was hard when the room was spinning.
"Bella what's wrong?" He didn't sound very concerned, in fact he looked as if he was trying to stifle a laugh. Amusement obvious in his eyes.
"Fiancée?" I choked out.
He nodded, a little more serious now, gazing over me features trying to figure out my expression.
"You mean it wasn't a dream?" I whispered mostly to myself, dropping my eyes, trying to remember the scene that had played in my head. Edward and I in the meadow, and then driving back to Charlie's house. The look on Charlie's face when we told him we were …
"Oh my god," I breathed, "We're…"
"Getting married," he finished warily, leaning closer, his eyes boring into mine, helplessly trying to read my thoughts. And with that he reached for my left had and watched my eyes as I took in the ring that rested on my third finger.
"Oh," I respired, placing my other hand on the side of my head, desperately wishing the room would stop spinning.
Edward knew me too well and quickly undid the first three buttons of his shirt and lowered me down to rest my forehead against his soothingly icy chest.
After a few deep breaths and my lips all too eagerly replacing my forehead, he bent down to kiss my hair. "Better?" He chuckled.
"I think so," I replied between kisses to his perfect chest.
"I must say, you did do better then Charlie," he said with a twinge of sadness in his voice.
"Charlie," I gasped, the whole scene fluttering back to me. Charlie forcefully taking me into the other room, away from Edward. Though I knew Edward would hear everything he said just the same. "What if he leaves you again Bella," Charlie had bellowed, making me flinch. "He left you once and was able to pick up all the pieces, but what about next time Bells? Huh? What if next time the pieces are too small?" Charlie had been on the verge of screaming at me and I had felt blistering tears form in my eye.
"You're wrong Dad." I had tried to sound strong, but my voice cracked, making me sound vulnerable and weak. "Edward's not going to leave me."
"Did you think he was going to leave the first time?" Charlie challenged.
That's when I began to cry, my broken sobs had erupted in my chest suddenly like someone had sent off a bomb. Then, remembering Edward could hear all of this, probably holding himself down against the urge to comfort me, had made me cry harder.
"Bella," Charlie had sighed frustrated. "I didn't mean to make you cry. Can we just talk about this first," his voice had become barley above a whisper at the end, pleading with me.
"There's nothing to talk about," I said back, barley containing the sobs. "I love Edward."
Suddenly Charlie, the name Edward, and the word love, all together in one room made me feel intensely claustrophobic. Though it must have been obvious that I loved Edward, even to someone as stubborn as Charlie, I had now realized that I never said it openly like that to him. Standing there I felt clear, like Charlie could see right through me. I didn't get to look at Charlie's face, to try and find the happiness and love, or at least acceptance that I was looking for. And it was a horrible feeling, the feeling of standing there with nothing to hide behind. I didn't get to analyze his expression, because I ran back to the kitchen where Edward was sitting. Sure enough his hand were clenched against the table, surely making dents and his eyes were squeezed tight. I didn't speak as I jumped onto his lap and collapsed against him, my body heaving with fresh sobs, feeling weak and guilty for putting Edward through this kind of torture.
I felt his hand smoothing down the back of my hair. I could fell the extra control it took to be gentle with me when his body had just been doused with anger. I couldn't remember anything after that. I guess that's the point where I fell asleep.
"I'm sorry, Edward," I gasped loudly, pulling back from my vision like state to throw my arms around his neck, " I'm so sorry."
He laughed and made soothing circles on my back, "don't apologize, Bella. It's not your fault."
I could hear it in his voice, he was blaming himself again. "Stop," I hissed pulling away.
"Stop, blaming yourself!"
"But Bella, if I didn't leave you, Charlie would have never –"
"I said stop," I interrupted him, his face pained. This whole blaming himself all the time thing was getting old.
"Lets get some things straight," I told him sternly, my own forehead wrinkling as I thought hard. "I love you, and for some bizarre reason you love me to."
His face hardened, but he didn't say anything. I must say, he was getting better at this stay on my good side thing.
"You made a deal with me, that you would change me, only if I married you first. Correct?"
"I said yes, and then when we told my dad he flipped out. Have I lost you yet?"
He smiled crookedly, shaking his head back and forth, his beautiful bronze hair falling in front of his eyes.
"I wake up in the morning to find you here, despite all of the horrible things Charlie most likely threatened you with."
Edward smiled bleakly and shrugged.
"So far I see nothing that you should be blamed for," I pointed out, surely a smug look on my face.
He glowered at me. I giggled and knelt down on the bed so that I could rest my forehead against his. "I love you. Don't you love me?"
He rolled his eyes.
I waited, "Well is that a yes or no?" I was teasing him.
"Isabella Marie Swan, I love you more then anyone in this entire universe loves another person."
I frowned at that. "You mean … besides me of course."
I watched his expression carefully as it became puzzled. "Excuse me?"
"Well, I love you more then anyone in this entire universe loves another person. And we both can't share the same title," I smirked.
He chuckled, kissed my nose, and then whispered in my ear, "So I guess I win." He was about to scoop me off the bed when I stopped him.
"Oh no you don't." I held a firm grip to my comforter. "You really don't think you love me more then I love you. Do you?"
He chuckled and scooped me up against my will anyway, but he didn't answer.
"Well?" I pressed.
"Let me get this straight," he prodded, "You think you love me more then I love you?"
I giggled but otherwise nodded. I don't think he knew if I was being serious or not. Was I being serious? I didn't even know, but the mixture of amusement and frustration on his face was priceless.
"Well you're wrong." He flashed a grin as we both remembered the last time this conversation had taken place. At the lunch table, junior year, all the while my heart had been beating so fast it must have bruised the inside of my chest. "And this time," he continued, "I'll prove it to you."
"Prove it to me?" I repeated, eyeing his face suspiciously. What was he getting at?
"Yes I'm going to prove it too you, with thirteen reasons."
"Thirteen reasons why…"
"Thirteen reasons why I love you of course."