Author's note- I was pretty darn proud of this but then I realized that Old Quil and Billy never were werewolves so I had to change the part at the end...sigh...

Hello mother,
Hello father

"Good morning Jacob" Billy said before digging his spoon in his bowl eagerly.

"What do you want, Dad?" Jacob demanded, one hand clenched in a fist and the other fervently scratching his neck.

Billy made no reply, as Jacob slammed the cabinets looking for food.

"Where's the cereal, Dad?" he yelled.

Billy calmly lifted the box sitting on the table.

"Right here, Jake."

Jacob snatched the box and dumped the entire contents into an enormous bowl. He was still scratching, only now on his leg.

"So. Damn. Itchy!" he muttered.

"Jacob, were you in the woods last night?" Billy asked calmly.

The werewolf's Achilles' heel. Fleas.

Fleas, ticks, mosquitoes,
Really bother!

Jacob was angrily throwing his clothes and sheets in the washing machine, one handed. The other hand was now scratching his back. He trembled, thinking of how Billy had been so calm, even laughing quietly when he thought Jacob wasn't looking.

He had no idea what fleas felt like.

"Old Quil keeps a few boxes of K9 Advantix for when this happens. They're for extra-large dogs." He chuckled again and reached for the phone.

Thanks for the package
That's why I'm writing

Jacob uncapped his pen with his teeth and tried to think of what to say. What did one write in a thank-you-for-the-flea-medicine card? Thanks? Or something more serious, like Thank you most sincerely? Or did he have to write one at all?

If only there was a guide to these things. He sat up suddenly. He could ask Sam.

K9 Advantix quickly stopped all the biting!

"So," Jacob began.

"Fleas, right?"

"How did you know?" Jacob wondered.

"Been there, done that." Sam flashed a rare smile.

"Did you use K9 Advantix?"He asked Jacob.

"Yes. It worked, like, right away, too! I am going to use it every month now for prevention from fleas, ticks, and other insect pests!"

Swimming hiking,
And tent pitching
They're not biting,
I'm not itching!

Jacob reveled in his freedom. The itching was gone. The scratching was gone. And the bites were already gone!

He leaped in the air, phased and began to chase his tail in joy.

Quil joined him and they ran through the creeks and crags, barking and sharing the experience through their telepathy.

Sam joined them, and so did Seth. They quickly organized a game of chase. Well, tried to organize. Seth playfully nipped Sam, and the resulting light-hearted scuffle destroyed the order.

Can't wait to show you,
All my new tricks

Old Quil leaned on his walking stick and closed his eyes, remembering how he had once watched his grandfather frolic with the pack. He wished once again that he could become a werewolf too, instead of just being "in the know", like Billy.

He looked down at his hand and smiled. A generic thank you card with a smiling dog on it beamed up at him.

The inside read:
Thanks again for sending me K9 Advantix!