A/N: Some lines and situations I got from Episode 25. Can't get enough of these two so I made one again, slightly longer than the last I made. Hope you like it. Reviews don't forget! he he he
L is feeling strange. There is something bothering him inside and he doesn't like it. He has mastered on how to control his emotions but right now he must be faltering. And there's the sound of the bells resounding in his ear, making him reminisce, making him uneasy.
He could feel the distress looming behind his back. The investigation is taking longer than expected, and the team has struck yet another dead end. Matsuda is snoring somewhere and Yagami-san is frustrated by the fact that his son is still suspected of being Kira. The handcuffs are proof for that, and as he looked his way down the other side of the chain that connects him and his suspect, he saw Raito completely immersed in the laptop in front of him, the light casting shadows on the boy's pretty face.
He looks good, thought L, maybe that's why he appeals to people well. He's popular and well-bred and is acting absurdly normal, thus the suspicion of being Kira once, or probably right now. He heard Aizawa's deep sighs and decides to call it a day for the team.
"Minna-san, I know you are all tired. You can all go home now. We will have a fresh start again in the morning."
Matsuda let out a great yelp and the team said their thanks and left, leaving him and Raito alone in the dim office room. The digital clock read 3:18am and the box of doughnuts he's eating have long missed its contents, and the sugar cubes are now inside his already warm coffee. He glanced over to where Raito was sitting, and as the boy's fingers danced through the laptop, the chains give off a tinkling, sleepy sound. He focused on his own computer and started reviewing files. And as he poised to type in again, he felt the chain move slightly and realized that Raito yawned while stretching his arms up, and he watched him with interest for a while and then got back to his computer screen, and as Raito started working again, he said
"Raito-kun, daijobu? You seem pretty tired." He didn't look at him so he never saw the expression on his face. Raito however stared at him. With no recollection of being Kira, he thought that being tied to the detective is as tedious as Hell. But he was wrong. The past few days he has gotten really curious about what's going on through L's mind. He's been really quiet, and his mind games and psychological attacks come in rare, although his sugar consumption seem to double at the process.
"No, I'm fine Ryuzaki. But you, though. Don't you think you need some rest too?"
do you mean Raito-kun?"
L's eyes never left the screen but he felt a wall beginning to build up somewhere and he felt somewhat weird. Has he developed some emotional concern for this detective who stops at nothing to prove he is somehow Kira? "You seem so quiet to me the past days Ryuzaki. I thought maybe you just need to clear your mind a bit."
"But I am not tired Raito-kun, I need to work. If you like you can sleep on the sofa over there and I will continue to work." He said his eyes still locked on the damn screen.
"No,Ryuzaki. We're both tired and I'm not going to sleep on some couch. Get up Ryuzaki, before I make you." He didn't mean it to be as bratty as that but he's getting pissed at how stubborn this man could be. He never admits what he feels and it's starting to wear on his nerves. Being chained together makes him feel like he's resembling L. He has this disheveled look that's beginning to annoy him and notices dark underlines in his eyes now. He hadn't had a good sleep since God-knows-when and tonight will be an exception.
"Raito-kun even if we sleep on that bedroom it'll be useless, I'm still bringing the laptop and the cake in the fridge with me. So what's the point?"
"Do whatever you like Ryuzaki, bring the damn laptop and the cake with you alright.I just want the bed. My back is aching like crazy trying to sleep while sitting up and chained to you."
To Raito's surprise L closed his laptop and got up. Why is he not being formidable today? He has been so quiet and seem to be not in the mood to have word fights with him. It's harder to convince him to do anything before. And as he followed L in the kitchen to get his pineapple upside down cake he couldn't help but wonder what could it be that makes L like this. Is he depressed again? Or is he just too tired like him to be indulged in an argument? He helped L carry his truckload of sweets and as they climbed up the stairs he heard him said softly
"It must be raining..."
"Hmmmm... yeah I heard sounds on the roof earlier. It doesn't seem to be raining hard though..."
They worked their way up in silence, and as the door closed behind them, Raito felt that L stopped dead in his tracks. He turned around and saw him looking at the window, his eyes fixed to it. And he was wrong with what he said earlier. It is raining hard. L continued to watch through the window, his face giving away nothing. There are no curtains in the room, it only has one big window that is tinted dark. He walked over to where he was standing and nudged him gently.
"Ryuzaki? Are you okay?"
As if waking up in deep reverie, he felt static come up his shoulder when Raito's skin made contact. He followed him to where the bed was, and placed his things at the bedside table and crouched over there, watching Raito as he climbed his side of the bed.
"Well, good night Ryuzaki." He closed his eyes, lying here in this bed is like a foreign feeling, mainly because he's been sleeping on chairs and stools lately. He rested his back comfortably and rested his head on the soft pillow.
L watched Raito as he lay there on his side, eyes closed and his chained hand now resting on his chest. This rain is bothering him to the hilt. He thought that being in this bedroom is a bad idea, for the window is a big distraction to his thoughts. He could hear the drops clearly now, and the bells are pounding harder and harder in his ear. He tried to block it by devouring his cake, and popping chocolates every so often, but then he found himself staring back at that window, lost in pointless reverie. He crouched nearer to the bedside table to where his laptop is, and by doing so, he got off-balance and gripped the sides of the table, causing the laptop to slip, and in his attempt to prevent it crashing down the floor, he lunged forward and managed to save it, but the chains of their handcuffs flew right smack on Raito's face.
"Itai! What the hell was that? Ryuzaki!" he snapped awake greatly annoyed. He looked at L's figure and saw him holding the laptop on one hand, the other gripping the side of the bedside table, knees still up to his chest at the edge of the bed. He didn't know what to do first, to laugh or to kick him. In the end, he helped L up and heaved a great sigh.
"Yare yare Ryuzaki. What are you doing? Don't you ever sleep? Or let people sleep? This is getting so stupid." He felt his left cheek and felt a painful throb there, he could feel the chain mark burn but then maybe that's just his displeasure rising.
"But Raito-kun, this is your idea. I told you I'd rather stay down the office. So, there is 76.98 that you brought this upon yourself." He retorted, looking at Raito's face, with his left cheek where the chain has landed turning red. He could see that the teen has clenched his fists in anger, and for a second readied himself to get punched at or something. But the punches never came. What came next shook L more than being hit.
"What's it with you Ryuzaki? I know you don't care about other people and it's getting tiresome. You're so distant, and stubborn and a puzzle. I hate putting up with this every freaking day. I don't know and get you at all."
It struck a nerve and he scratched one knee and said "But I never asked Raito-kun to know me,nor get me. This chain" he said, moving his handcuffed hand up and the other pointing at it "and you being tied with me is just my way of proving that you're not Kira. I never said that it would be fun."
"Yeah you're right. No one really knows what you're up to. What do we know about you anyway? The only thing that's certain to us is your abnormal love for sweets and a letter for a name!" this time he didn't hold back. And the look on L's face troubled him. What has he done? Did he somehow break the barrier of L's emotions? But he just sat there, in his usual manner, looking at him with those innocent eyes. After a moment or so, L slowly turned his back, still sitting the way he used to and picked up his fork.
"Gomen. Go back to sleep Raito-kun..." Something stirred inside Raito. Why is he like this? He knew that L is not used to showing his feelings to people, but the way his voice sounded... it's like ice down his skin. He looked at the crouching figure in front of him, and he suddenly felt an urge to pull him close. But his left cheek throbbed in pain and remembered why he was angry.
"Right. I'm going back to sleep, don't try anything stupid again or I'll yank this handcuffs off of you." He slumped back to bed and turned his back to L too. He threw the pillow over his head and closed his eyes. He felt L move and the chime of a fork on a saucer. L probably started eating again. He ignored the detective and grasped the pillow and feigned sleeping, consciously making out what was happening behind his back. Unwavering silence came next. He thought maybe L decided to sleep after all. But out of all the things he expected L to do, it never prepared him for what he realized next.
Raito heard a faint ticking sound. Something being unlocked. It can't be! He didn't just took off the handcuffs off of him didn't he? He felt the bed move and knew L got up. He can hear padded footsteps away from where the bed was and he just lay there, anxious of what L could possibly be doing. Unable to fake it, he turned around slowly putting away the pillow over his head and he saw him standing there by the window, his reflection dancing in the dim glass.
Even though his image is obscured by the rain, there's no denying that the eyes that pierced him so intently, and so emotionless at times now seem to mirror different levels of mixed sobriety and repression. He sat up and stared at his slightly hunchbacked figure down the window. L unblinkingly stared at the water sliding down the smooth glass, oblivious of the teenager now watching him with profound curiosity. Raito looked at the now empty end of the handcuffs and wondered why L is acting this way. He looked back up and blurted
"Ryuzaki, what's wrong?" L turned his head a little to acknowledge that he heard him, and his hair covered his dark eyes, and without moving from where he was he asked,
"Since the day you were born, have you ever told the truth even once?" It took a while before Raito had the sense to answer the question.
"What are you talking about Ryuzaki? Of course I tell lies occasionally. There is no human who have never told a lie, but I make sure that if I do tell lies, it will not hurt the ones that I love."
"I see. Maybe that's why you're popular... But... If I try to be honest now, will you listen?"
A deep kind of chill is now playing in Raito's spine. He managed to say the word 'yes' out and sat at the edge of the bed, heart pounding. L moved his gaze back towards the window, pondering on words to say. He put his hands on his pockets, feet rubbing together like trying to relieve an itch that wasn't there.
"You said I don't know anything about people. It's true. I don't know anything about emotions, or relationships, maybe even friendship. I don't know the first thing about being someone's friend and it hurts somehow. It hurts that what you know about me is only a beautifully stylized letter for a name. But what hurts most maybe is being unable to say it hurts... after all these years of existing... or not..." His forehead touched the cold glass, and his hair completely blocked his eyes from view.
Raito sat there still, cold sweat running the sides of his face, his eyes also hidden from view. L, the famous, eternally indifferent young genius just broke a side of the wall he so carefully built upon himself. Raito stood up with the chain crashing down the floor, and in one instant movement hugs L from behind, shock rippling inside the young detective. He nuzzled on his smooth neck, his lips trailing just below his ear and whispered "Daijobu... you can tell me." L saw their reflection in the window and goosebumps rise from his skin. This feeling... it can't be good... but why does it feel so? He can feel Raito's lean chest brushing up his back, his hands clutching his shirt. He could feel his warm breath at his nape now, sending another wave of strangely pleasant shocks in his spine.
But he broke away, pushing him back and turning to face him.
"No, Raito-kun. You will never understand. You... you... I suspect you of being Kira and you're like this. How will I know if it is just a front you're using against me?"
Raito, agitated by the surprisingly harsh words grabbed L by the shoulders and sits him down the window ledge and caged him with his arms on both sides. His head bowed low, so he couldn't see the detective's confused reaction as he watched him, his scent filling his system like a virus.
So this is what it's like with your reason dropping 40 when you sit the normal way L thought, because right now he could not think properly, the only thing he knew is how close Raito was and how he seem to need his touch. And with these thoughts swirling in his mind, Raito's head moved up, leveling with his. His honey-colored gaze was met with his confused dark ones, and Raito's head moved ever so slowly, and he could feel his slow, warm breath in his cheek, his nostrils inhaling the sweet scent coming from his body. The last thing he saw is Raito's lips parting slightly as it gently covered his own.
L felt Raito's lips caress the sides of his mouth, with firm, steady pressure that felt so damned good leaving him weak and sliding under the ledge Raito had to steady him again, his hands moving through his shoulders sliding to his back. His other hand now grabbed handfuls of his hair, deepening the kiss as he went. L closed his eyes, as waves of pleasure start to wash over him. There's a sensation coming forth below his waist, and as Raito's body rubbed into him he could feel the same warm hardness coming from him, driving him onto unknown verges of ecstasy.
He could feel himself succumbing to this feeling, but as Raito's hand started to travel down his navel, he pushed him back a second time with his senses coming back to him. He covered his mouth with the back of his hand and stood up looking at the bereft teenager, with his eyebrows meeting at the center. He heard him say
"Why... why won't you let people in? Why won't you let me in?"
He crossed the room away from Raito, but before he could go on further with his steps he felt Raito grip his arm and wheeled him around with such force he faced him again. L shocked by the sudden movement made a few steps back, stopping when he felt the edge of the bed on his heels. Before he could do anything else, nor say anything Raito held up a hand on his lips, then softly touched the bridge of his nose and said "Daijobu" while tilting his chin up and dove in for a fast, open-mouthed kiss.
His tongue moved, claiming and overpowering Ryuzaki, and as the teen caressed his chest he stopped holding back for they knew they were in vain, so he kissed back letting all suppressed feelings out and savored his sweet, soft mouth, his hands moving to run through his hair. They moaned in pleasure, and Raito's tongue traveled down his neck and licked his ear, whispering, breathing hard and pulling him close to him. They crashed on the bed, with the chains still on Raito dangling at his side. He stopped kissing his neck and hugged him close and as he shifted them in a sitting position he hugged him even tighter.
"Ryuzaki-kun?" the words resonated in L's mind. He called me Ryuzaki-kun.
And in that fevered trance he answered with half-closed eyes "Hmmmmm, Raito-kun?"
"Ryuzaki you told me I was your first friend, ne? But I have never been one to you. Not ever. So tonight, I'll prove to you that I am, and that I could be more than that..." He released him and Raito picked up the chain of his still attached handcuff, when he reached the other end he said,
"They're always on the way, they're heavy and they're cold. But if this would let me be closer to you, then I guess it's fine." And he locked the other end back on L's wrist, and the detective held it up as if to see if it really was there. Raito cupped his face and looked right in his eyes, flashing a faint smile. L took one hand and entwined it on his own, and tilted his head so he could welcome Raito's waiting kiss. This time he hugged Raito when they both catch up for breath. He nestled on his neck, and moved his lips closer to his ear.
"For the first time since I suspected you, for the first time... I don't want you to be Kira. Please, Raito-kun, do not be Kira..."
Raito sat there wide-eyed with shock with what he just heard. He could feel L's fast breathing on his neck. He grabbed L by the shoulder so he could see his face, and his eyes bore the same innocence as ever looking back at him. They kissed once more, with a renewed intensity that sent them both on fire. And after the deep, extraordinary sensation, their foreheads touched, with L's eyes closed. As he opened them he saw Raito looking at him searchingly.
"Arigato, Raito-kun," their lips melding. Raito hugged him again, this time lying on the bed, beside each other, wrapped in each other's arms.
"Tonight you will sleep... I'll help you..." And he felt him kiss his hair. L, knowing that the wall around him indeed cracked, let go of the world and felt safe, in Raito's arms, his face feeling the calm breathing in Raito's chest.
Morning dawned, and L could feel the bed under his skin, and he could also feel wisps of hair brushing his face. Someone began to pull him close, and the bells that have been so loud yesterday seem to be just a faded, distant echo, almost inaudible. He was awoken completely with pale honey eyes looking longingly back at him, with soft, warm lips covering his own. He heard the rain still pounding on the roof, but he no longer cared. He may never know why, but he felt himself smile in that kiss that lasted for what seemed like eternity...