Title: BLEACH – Immaculate

Rating: T

Pairing: IchiHichi

Disclaimer: Tomatoes are red, blueberries are blue…um, mangos are yellow, unlike…orange? (My poetry sucks)

Summary: AU. 'You know, when you're fifteen, you're not supposed to be sharing a bed OR shower with your twin brother.' IchiHichi. Twincest.


Ufufufuu…my first completely AU story really, but since my other IchiHichi stories were such a hit, I decided to write an AU one. Hope everyone will like this as much as Dysfunctional Camaraderie!!!

Sorry if some people are OOC but this is my first time writing a drastic AU. Hum, criticism is welcome!

Plus, the pairing is HichiIchiHichi. Dunno who's gonna be the seme yet…


Word Count: 3'549


"She fell onto a burning sword, exploded into a million pieces where two dwarfs made entirely out of celery and spider sperm took back the tinfoil stolen from a school bus when the children on board tried to smuggle chutney over the Mexican border in their headsbefore drowning in a well of Dentist piss."

--- Don't ask.



People always said that two guys aged fifteen sleeping in the same bed isn't socially acceptable.

But if Ichigo actually cared what other people thought, he would've dyed his hair black long ago.

However, currently neither he nor his twin was in a bed of any sorts, rather, the very uncomfortable backseat of their father's truck. His sisters, Karin and Yuzu, were in the two front seats beside their energetically chattering father; Karin's scathing remarks accompanied by Yuzu's scolding not deflating the immature man's excitement.

Ichigo was being used as a pillow.

Shiro didn't do well with travelling, so the albino teen was stretched out along the backseat, his head resting on the redhead's lap with an arm hanging off the edge of the backseat and the other draped over his stomach. Ichigo didn't mind though, he absently ran his fingers through snow white hair – which was more out of habit then anything.

"Hey, Old Man. Are we nearly there yet?" The redhead called over the cacophony of three voices. Isshin peered at the eldest twin with the rear view mirror and nodded.

"In about 20 minutes, my son!" He chirped in his usual childish demeanour. He was immediately dragged into another argument with the youngest Kurosaki siblings and Ichigo sighed heavily.

"Dammit." The albino groaned. Outlandish gold eyes cracked open as the truck went over a particularly large bump. "Why'd we hafta move again, King?" Ichigo's lips curled up into smirk at the whiny tone to the question and tugged a little sharply at spiky white hair.

"You don't remember, idiot? Dad got a transfer to some clinic in a town called Karakura or something." He shrugged and adjusted his sitting position against the car door. "Personally I think Dad just wanted to get away from our old home since…"

The two twins fell silent at that, allowing the three way argument up front to fill the sudden quietness. The albino groaned when the car went over another large bump. "Dammit…old man! Can't ya drive a little smoother!? Zangetsu drives better than ya!!" Ichigo snickered when the eldest male Kurosaki squawked that he was 'far better than that depressing man.'

"You're not gonna be sick, are you?" The redhead asked, looking cautiously at the greenish tint that coloured the youngest twin's normally alabaster skin. The truck jolting and a pained groan answered his question. "Hey! Old man! Shiro's gonna be sick if you keep that up!"

"Oh, Shiro's always sick." Karin cuttingly remarked while looking sordidly at the scenery shooting by. "He catches some illness practically every week, and he gets motion sickness. God knows what else he'll have next."

The albino twin bristled at having his weaknesses dragged unceremoniously out in the open and thumped the back of the female Kurosaki sibling's seat. "Shaddup! At least I don' sleep with th' night-light on!" He immediately cringed as a wave of nausea roiled his stomach with the sudden movement.

Karin shrugged, not at all insulted. "You have to sleep with your Ichigo Teddy Bear."

"Soccer freak." The albino retorted weakly, clutching at his stomach when his light breakfast tried to escape. Ichigo visibly grimaced. "Try to keep it in, moron. I don't want vomit all over me."

"I will hurl if all of ya don't shaddup!" The car jolted again. "And this fuckin' car stops bouncin'!"

"Language!" Isshin warned sternly, lifting a hand from the steering wheel to wave it in the general direction of the youngest twin. "I won't have you swearing in front of your younger sisters, Shiro!"

"Fuck you, old man."

Ichigo rolled his eyes in exasperation, clamping a hand over the albino's mouth before any more profanities slipped out. "Aw, is Shiro-chan cranky?" He cooed sickly, grinning a little at the disgruntled expression his younger twin shot up at him.

"Fuphh yophh." Was the muffled growl accompanied by a venomous glare with molten gold eyes. Ichigo winced a second afterwards when this statement was followed up by the albino's tongue licking his palm but he did not remove his hand. "Ew. That's disgusting."

A smudge of victory stained the younger twin's golden eyes.

"Oh-ho!" The redhead crowed. "So you wanna play, huh?" The hand that was recently clamped over the albino's mouth skimmed down the albino's pale shirt, the eldest twin grinned when Shiro squirmed in discomfort. "Who's been King for ten years?"

"Tch." The albino lethargically batted away the hands from his ticklish sides in mild irritation. "You cheat, King, so it doesn't count." Shiro thumped the back of Karin's chair when snickering could be heard. "Shaddup, ya lil' monster."

"You two are so gay." Karin snorted in bland amusement, ignoring her sister's disapproving half hearted glare. "…Together." She added on as an afterthought. Another thump on the seat made her erupt into another fit of vindictive sniggers.

"You've been hanging around those Twincest girls again, haven't you?" Ichigo accused dismissively. "You know the ones that hand out those smutty photos of male twins making out or whatever."

The car swerved dangerously as Isshin choked in surprise. Ignoring Shiro's angered shouts and swearing for the time being, the single parent stared in horror at the road ahead of them.

"Karin! You have been hanging around with perverts!?" Isshin flicked the sun visor down to reveal a photo of a beautiful woman. "Masaki! My love! Please forgive me for allowing our lovely daughter Karin to be corrupted by vile perverts!"

A vein bulged at Karin's temple as she screeched. "I have not been corrupted, Dad! And will you stop sticking pictures of Mom everywhere, please! It was bad enough when you stuck one in the bathroom!" Another yelling match between them ensued as Yuzu attempted to keep the peace, and failing miserably.

"Hn." Shiro snorted contemptuously. "That lil' monster 'as always been corrupted; she's th' female version of that kid in 'The Omen'."

"You are the kid in 'The Omen'." Ichigo shot back flatly. Looking away from the squabbling trio to outside, he caught the first glimpse of Karakura Town. "Hm. It seems like a nice place."

"I don' care if it's nice or not." The albino groaned in nausea as another swerve unsettled his stomach. "As long as it has a toilet and a chair to kill th' old man with."

"Bludgeoning the old man to death with a chair won't do anything 'cept land you in jail." The redhead yawned, tangling his fingers back into snow white locks. "Plus he's like a cockroach. Nothing will kill him."

"Like The Terminator." The albino mumbled to himself absently, being lulled to sleep by the eldest twin's fingers massaging his scalp. "Wha'ver. It'll ma'e me feel be'er." Shiro slurred as he drifted off to sleep. Ichigo rolled his eyes again.

"No point going to sleep, idiot." The redhead admonished, though it landed on deaf ears. "We're gonna be there soon."

He didn't receive an answer – though he wasn't expecting one – and Ichigo looked back out of the window, watching streets and pedestrians pass by. It seemed like a moderately sized town, not too crowded and friendly looking too. Ah well, that means the alleyways would be crawling with those itching for a fight. A great way to relieve stress.

Ichigo's attention snapped back to the single parent as the truck rolled to a stop outside of a reasonably large building, 'Kurosaki Health Clinic' sign in Kanji and English placed above automatic glass doors. Isshin turned in his seat to give the perpetually frowning teen an excited grin.

"Welcome to our new home, kids!"


He was glad Shiro was so damn light.

Giving the sleeping albino a piggy back was something that he had done plenty of times due to his twin's, ah…condition (That-Shall-Not-Be-Named-In-Shiro's-Presence). Standing in the empty entrance room – a small waiting room to the left and a corridor leading down to the five rooms for patients – Ichigo looked round at the unopened boxes.

"So this is where you've been going to for the past few weeks with our stuff, Dad." Karin snidely cut in, turning round and looking through an open doorway opposite the 'medical' side of the building. "So we're living in a health clinic, huh?"

Yuzu smiled happily. "I think it's great, you guys! That means Dad won't be away from home in work because home is work!"

Karin and Ichigo shared a look in a temporary truce born from disbelief. And that's a good thing…?

"Yes, my lovely daughter, Yuzu!" Isshin cried happily, a blown up poster of Masaki already tacked up on the wall behind him. "Come give your father a manly hug!" He cheered, sweeping the petite girl into his arms and spinning round.

Karin grumbled under her breath and marched over to the mountain of boxes to look for her stuff, steering well clear of the energetic duo in distaste. Ichigo stared at the two for a few seconds, his brain already too used to the display filled with bubbles and the random pink sparkle for it to be traumatised, before ambling off up the stairs to dump his younger twin on a flat surface somewhere.

He heard a faint, 'your room is at the far end, my son!' as he reached the landing and the redhead looked down the corridor, spotting five individual doors. Adjusting his grip on the sleeping albino's legs the eldest Kurosaki sibling kicked the door open with a clothed foot and raised an eyebrow.

The room was pretty big, though bare aside from the double mattress bed underneath the wide window, dark green curtains partially closed. Ichigo shrugged as well as he could with dead weight draped over his shoulders and walked up to the bed, turning round and depositing his younger twin upon the bed.

The albino merely mumbled and curled up on the soft quilt, burying his face into his arms in the process. Ichigo couldn't help rolling his eyes for the third time that day, ruffling the white hair fondly and lying down on the bed next to his albino twin. They always shared a bed, amongst other things, no matter how 'socially unacceptable' it was. It seemed natural to do so.

He snuck a half lidded glance at his sleeping twin. Then again, Shiro wasn't exactly socially acceptable either, being an albino and all, with uncanny golden eyes. Ichigo huffed and flung an arm over his bronze eyes, a small yawn contorting his features briefly. That car ride really wore him out, especially when dealing with his dysfunctional family for 2 hours straight.

He rolled over and spooned against his twin, falling into a light sleep.



"Dammit." The albino groaned in despair. "Dad's awake." He looked past his elder twin's orange hair to peer at the open doorway, a grinning Isshin with pink sparkles twinkling merrily in the background.

Shiro fought the urge to brush his teeth. "Shaddup old man and piss off!" However, the single parent wasn't deterred by his son's hostile reception and bounded into the room happily. "Daaaaaaaaad!"

"My sons!" Isshin ignored the younger twin's whine but he did nudge the dozing Ichigo's head with his foot. "Today we shall…UNPACK!" Obviously he was waiting for a happy chorus to do the tedious chore that was unpacking everyone's possessions from cardboard boxes.

A pillow slammed squarely into his face via a disgruntled Ichigo accompanied by a growl. "We'll do it later."

The eldest Kurosaki recovered quickly. "Ah ah ah!" He cried, wagging his finger at the two glaring twins. "You'll say that you'll do it later now. But later, you'll say the exact thing! Now get up my lazy sons and unpack your possessions!" With that said, Isshin sailed from the room crying, "KARIN! MY LOVELY DAUGHTER!!! TIME TO UNPAAAAAACK!!!"

"Please tell me we're adopted." The redhead grumbled, pushing himself from the crumpled quilt. Shiro scoffed and rolled over, obviously not going to move anytime soon. "Fine. We're adopted." The albino slurred, already drifting back to sleep.

"Oh no you don't!" The eldest twin snarled; grasping the back of the albino's pale T-shirt. "If I'm going to suffer, you're going to suffer with me!" A few minutes later, the evidence of Ichigo's bullying was evident through two things; one, Shiro was out of bed, and two, the younger twin's trousers were pulled halfway down his legs when he refused to let go of the double bed's headboard.

Pulling his trousers back up round his hips – and casting a disgruntled glare at the retreating back of his twin – Shiro followed the redhead out of the room, unconsciously ducking under Isshin's flailing arm as Karin bodily threw him out of her bedroom.

The albino grimaced lightly when a mild headache pounded against his temples due to the very loud argument between Karin and their eccentric father and the bright fluorescent lights above.

"Guh. Do they hafta be so loud?" Shiro whined piteously, pinching the bridge of his nose in irritation. He stepped back when Ichigo nosed through the cardboard boxes, picking out the ones with the twins' names on them.

"You know those two; they'd never be able have a normal conversation with each other using indoor voices." Dumping the albino's box in front of Shiro, Ichigo took a closer look round. "It's bigger then our last home."

"Th' last home was cosy." Shiro muttered with an overtone of defensiveness. "Don' know why th' old man wanted to move so much." But he silently agreed that their new home was larger. He blinked in surprise when another box was dumped before him.

"You know why." Ichigo grunted. "It was killing Dad staying there." He ignored his younger twin's disgruntled sigh and thwacked the albino lightly on the shoulder. "C'mon, idiot. Let's just unpack for now while the old man is still distracted."


Shiro hated himself sometimes.

Well, not exactly himself, but rather this crappy, faulty body of his.

It had decided to happen again – which he should've seen coming as headaches usually were the warning signals – so his elder twin told him to 'park his skinny pale ass down' and that he'll finish unpacking while the albino's dizzy spell passed.

Shiro cursed his body again.

He remembered when they were five or six, that their dad's colleagues told him that he would be 'lucky to make it to his teens' due to his…condition, but at the time Shiro didn't care aside from actually being able to get up and walk without the help of his brother or mother; though it always left him really tired afterwards.

He hated being frail and a burden, which was the reason why he had his tough guy attitude and only asked for help when…well, he never did. King usually knew when he was feeling off and would make him rest with or without the albino's consent. Contrary to the doctors' claims, he made it to his teens and was still going strong, despite the dizzy spells and crappy immune system.

He squeezed his eyes shut as the world stopped swirling round sickeningly and took deep breaths. That high pitched ringing noise in his ears that accompanied these frequent dizzy spells vanished and Shiro heard the faint scuff of feet and objects being placed or moved around.

He was also thankful that King wasn't much of a mother hen either.

Lying there for a few more seconds to shake off the dregs of disorientation, the albino pushed himself up from the bed and watched as Ichigo placed the last content of the now empty cardboard box – an alarm clock – on the bedside table and kicked the box into a far corner, muttering, "You never know when we'll need a box."

Shiro shook his head in bemusement. King could be such a weirdo sometimes.

Bronze eyes turned to the smirking albino. "You okay now?"

Shiro waved a flippant hand before falling aback onto the soft comfort of the quilt. "Yeah. This one wasn' a bad one." He stretched languidly, spreading his body across the bed, limbs taking up most of the space on the bed. "I haven' had a fit in…" He paused in thought. "A year I think."

"You could be getting better." Ichigo muttered slowly, nudging the paler of the two's arms out of the way before flopping down next to his younger twin. "Or it could be the calm before the storm."

"Cynic." The albino snorted, though the redhead saw the albino's sinewy muscles tense slightly. "But maybe yer right." Dulled gold eyes turned to his frowning brother. "Maybe I'll have a really violent fit one day an' die a horrible, gruesome death. Who knows, really?"

Ichigo growled, roughly shoving the albino's shoulder. "Don't say things like that. You're not going to die."

"That's what ya implied." Shiro muttered tightly, rolling over so that his back was facing the redhead. "'Sides, it's a fuckin' terminal illness. I'll die of it sooner or later." The albino hugged himself as old fears clawed at his chest. "I'm lucky ta be alive now."

He tensed up slightly when feeling his elder twin wrap an arm round his waist and tugged him gently against the redhead's chest. "Shut up, moron." Ichigo snorted softly. "If you're going to stress about it then you're obviously going to work yourself into an early grave, illness or not. You don't usually care about this anyway."

A low laugh wormed its way from Shiro's throat, an almost maniacal grin stretching his alabaster face. "Nah. I don', do I?" The albino snorted to himself in mild disgust. "Dunno what came over me then. Ignore those past few minutes."

Ichigo gave Shiro's waist a quick squeeze before releasing him and rolling off the bed. "Alright then. C'mon, moron. Let's go get a bite to eat before Dad gets it into his head to cook again."

Shiro snickered as he followed his elder twin from the room. "Yeah. How th' Hell did he set fire to th' water anyway?"



Motion Sickness is not fun guys. Not fun at all.

Many of you are probably confused as to why I made Hichigo the weak one. I'll tell you my reason. Hichigo is the youngest because, in Canon!BLEACH™, Ichigo is older as Hichigo didn't fully come into being until around when Ichigo was 15 (Though my own theory was that the Hollow was floating about in Ichigo's mind when Ichigo's mother died but fully awakened when he gained his Shinigami powers. But, y'know, that's my theory) and as for being weak?

Now then, you heard sometimes, when a woman is pregnant with twins, that one of them is stronger than the other – and that usually the younger one dies for a multitude of reasons that I won't get into right now – something to that affect happened. Aside from being albino, Shiro has a mutant gene that makes him all sick and crappy.

Here's where science mumbo jumbo comes in so I won't start speaking sciencese and give it to ya in layman terms. You have heard of mutations within DNA, right? Well, an albino is a mutation within those genes that cause them to be unable to produce colour pigments, basically. They either have very pale blue eyes or slightly pinkish eyes and pale skin/hair (There are actually multiple strains of albinism but I could go on for hours about that so wikipedia it). Now then, with Shiro, however, this mutation had another mutation into a genetic disease which made the doctors tell Isshin that; 'the albino kid's got a terminal illness, yo, he'll be meeting the Big Man Upstairs before he's ten'.

Of course Shiro ain't gonna lay down and take that.

Dunno what to call his illness actually as some hereditary diseases cause the same effects that Shiro is going through (dizziness/violent seizures/fainting/etc) but whatever.

Genetics are so tricky.

Oh, and before I forget, at the moment, the intimacy that Ichigo and Shiro have ain't Eros (Sexual/Romantic love); they're just really really close brothers. Yeah… ¬.¬

This'll be angsty/fluffness and whether it'll have a sad or happy ending…well; that's what polls are for. Who wants a happy ending?

Hope y'all enjoyed!