Once a Freak, Always a Freak
Always a Freak
Dean tucked the blankets up closer to Sam's chin, fingers lightly tugging through his long hair and pushing it off his face. He patted the covers unconscientiously and moved away in the darkness to lie down on his own bed. He had sat for almost two hours soothing his kid brother as he rested uneasily. The migraine Sam was experiencing was one of the worst he had seen, and he had been around for a lot of them. The fact Sam was even having a migraine just pissed him off. When was Sam going to get a break? It was bad enough before Cold Oak, the physic kids, the damn demon, but now, Dean was at a loss as to why his brother would be having migraines again. What did it mean? Were visions soon to follow?
The sun cast a dark yellow hue across the motel room as it peeked over the top of the dirty curtains. Sam shifted slightly and flung his long arm up over his face, to cover it from the brightness. He vaguely remembered the last 24 hours, a multitude of murky memories coming to mind. The car, a dingy restaurant, a headache…the worst he had ever experienced and then nothing. He blinked his bleary eyes as he moved his arm down to squint at the sunlight, attempting to pull his ragged mind back toward some order. His head throbbed lightly, although nothing like it did before. He slowly turned, gazing toward the other bed. Dean looked exhausted, like he had been up all night. His muddled mind attempted to sort through the sluggishness, vague moments dancing around in brief spurts of reality. A voice that had murmured to him, a beacon through the blinding pain. A warm hand that had rested on his arm; grounding him to reality, and a slow, continuous motion, brushing through his bangs, soothing him to sleep. He smiled faintly. Dean. Suddenly, he trembled as recollection assaulted him and he pulled in a shuddering breathe of air. He wanted to forget, forget the darkness, the demons, the deals, the headaches. Forget the overwhelming fear, the fear that his visions may come again.
"So, if we get there by 5:00, we can stow our gear. We can get something to eat, walk around. See the sights." Sam's voice echoed through the Impala.
"Uh huh…" Dean nodded, fingers twisting on the steering wheel.
"You know I might just eat some dessert tonight, I am really hunger. Hey Dean, we might want stop and wash the car on the way. I saw a sign back there about a car wash. You remember when Dad used to let us wash the car…."
Yada, yada, yada. Dean sighed; his brother had been yammering non stop for the last 300 miles, about absolutely nothing. His mindless chatter was grating on Dean's nerves, but more than that, he had not said a word about "it". The 'it' being the massive migraine he had experienced the day before, the first one in six months. He watched with concerned eyes as Sam did not seem to acknowledge it, but chattered on and on about everything else. This was not a good thing. He had attempted to breach the topic several times since they loaded back up in the Impala and hit the road, but Sam just changed the subject. He had finally had enough of his brother's mindless chatter and whipped the car into the next rest area. As much as I don't like chick flick moments….We ARE talking about this. He switched off the ignition as he turned to glare intently at his little brother.
"Wh…" Sam stuttered, as his head turned to look at Dean. "Why we stopping, I though you wanted to get there by 5:00? You know if we get there before then…."
"SHUT Up, Sam." Dean's voice edged on anger, but his face showed something totally akin to worry.
Sam's eyes grew large as he clamped his mouth shut, staring at his brother.
"You have been talking non-stop for the last 3 hours about everything, but what I want you to talk about."
"You…you want me to talk about something?" Sam's wide eyes gawked at Dean, a large knot clutching in his throat. I don't want to talk about it.
"Oh come on man, you know I want you to talk about something. I have brought it up four times in the last 2 hours, but you just ignore me, and keep on talking about bullshit." Dean's eyebrows arched up in a large V, his piecing grey eyes gaping at his younger brother.
Sam seemed to slump in the passenger seat, eyes glazing over, turning back to the dashboard. "I…I…don't want to talk…." He whispered.
"Sam…" Dean watched as his brother seemed to curl in on himself, looking far younger than his 25 years. "Listen, I know …"
Sam's hand wretched down to grab the handle as he swung the heavy metal door open with a creak, "No…no…no…man, I am not talking about this." He whipped his legs out of the car and moved silently toward a wayward picnic table in the tree line, door thudding harshly behind him.
Dean shifted in the front seat and sucked in a heavy breath of air. He watched his brother's retreating back and pulled himself out of the Impala, following behind Sam. He eyed his back quietly as Sam plopped himself down on the picnic bench, lying his tousled locks down on his crossed arms against the table, face hidden from his older brother's view. He stepped up silently next to him and waited, hoped that Sam would relent, and talk to him about everything that was going on in the freaky head of his. He heard a light hiccup come from his little brother's lips and watched as a light shudder racked his long body. Sam was crying. He shuffled quickly into full big brother mode, and sat down hastily on the bench, bringing his fingers up to nest in his brother's neck, thumb rubbing gently against the back of his hair.
"It's okay Sammy. It will be okay." He murmured.
Sam slowly raised his head, his red rimmed eyes peering at his brother, tears rolling unabated down his cheeks. "I don't….don't want…I can't…" he stuttered.
"Shhhh. Sam, I'll be here. If a vision happens…." He kept his hand resting on the nap of Sam's neck, eyes never wavering from Sam's gaze.
"I thought…you know…thought I was done… I don't want to have them. I'm sc...scared Dean. I don't want to be psychic, a freak again." Sam's hand reached up and lightly brushed the tears from his cheeks as he looked intently at his older brother.
"Well, if it's meant to be, we will just deal with it. Just like before, Sam…. We will deal with it." Dean smile eased up on his lips. His brother wasn't scared of ghosts, monsters, or any other supernatural creature; but a vision that scared the crap out of them both. "We have always been in this together Sam. We will always be in this together. Got it?" He gave Sam's neck a grasp, shaking his head lightly.
Sam nodded slowly. "Th...thanks Dean." He leaned into his brother's hand and Dean tugged his head down lightly, fingers placing a nuggie on the top of his Sam's shaggy hair.
"De...AN…" Sam quipped, grin rising to his lips. His brother's fingers patting him lightly on the shoulder as they both stood and walked slowly back toward the waiting Impala.
"Hey, Sammy." Dean voice quirked out as he walked beside his little brother, eyes crinkling up in laugh lines.
"Yeah", Sam said, pace steady as he turned to look at his brother.
"You know you have always been a freak…right? It's got nothing to do with visions."
Sam's face eased into an extensive smile, a light laugh escaping from his lips. He rolled his eyes and poked his elbow in his brother's side. Dean ducked away quickly as he veered from his brother's nudge.
Dean chuckled and grinned back at his little brother. Visions or no visions, Sammy was worth the chick flick moment.