Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, and I never, ever will. This is fanfiction, being written for no other reason than the stupid fanfiction-bug biting me.

AN: This is a 'what-if' story. What the what-if is, I don't know. But Yachiru and Nell know each other. . . . And Nell always has this sort-of lisp when she's talking with the letter 'S'. Those are not typos.

"Ya—Yachiru-nee-chan!" Nell pointed beside them at one of the bodies with wide eyes.

Yachiru blinked and said, in a very cutesy way, "Oh! He's injured!"

Nell eyes were wide and fearful. "Oh, that'th bad. . . ." She looked up at the slightly taller, pink-haired girl. "What'd we do?"

"What do you mean, what do we do? You drool on him!"

Nell considered this. ". . . I don't think he'd like that."

"Why not?"

"Everyone elthe theemth upthet when I do that. . . ."

"Oh, don't be silly! They just don't know how to thank people properly."


"Yep! Ken-chan said so!"

"Oh, well, okay!"

Yumichika awoke with a splutter and a cough.

"Oh! I think it's working!" He could barely see the grinning face of his lieutenant above him, and it frightened him. Badly. "Do it just one more time!"

"Okay." Yumichika's vision cleared up a little more, just in time for him to see a little blueish-green-haired girl with a skull mask stick her hand into her mouth. His eyes widened in horror.


Nell barfed on him.

A half hour later, when reinforcements found them, Yumichika was still trying to figure out how to get such "ugly stuff" out of his mouth and off his clothes and skin with only the use of some dirt and some twigs with leaves on them (and do it beautifully, damn it) and Yachiru and Nell were still laughing.