Hey. This is practically one of the very first fan fictions I have ever written or posted online, so please do not be too harsh on any errors in spelling, grammar, or anything else you find you do not like. Instead, how about a friendly review offering advice or constructive criticism? Anyhoo, I hope you enjoy it.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of the characters in the story. Masashi Kishimoto created and owns them all. Not me.
"Jiraiya-sama, why are you following me?"
"Whaaaaa?? How the hell'd you know I was there, you little - " Jiraiya stepped out from behind a doorway. He walked into the street, the setting sun casting his shadow across the road.
Kakashi turned to give the Sannin a weary stare. "I am a jounin, you do realize that."
Jiraiya huffed and crossed his arms over his chest. "Yes, but I have long since perfected my sneaking techniques. I have fooled many a lady with them."
"What are you talking about?"
Jiraiya smirked. "Oh, nothing…"
Kakashi just shrugged and started walking away.
"Hey, hey, wait!" Jiraiya raced after the silver-haired teen. "I wanted to give you a little something for being accepted into ANBU."
Kakashi froze. "How'd you know about that? That's classified information!"
"My dear boy, Minato was my dearest student, and I his dearest teacher. He couldn't help but inform me of your achievement!"
"You were probably eavesdropping," Kakashi muttered darkly.
Jiraiya ignored the last comment, instead rustling around in his sack for something. "Minato…wouldn't let me…give it to you…but…I think…you should…be allowed to…have it…" Jiraiya, after much rummaging, finally pulled out a small parcel. "Here it is!"
"What do you mean, Minato wouldn't let you give it to me?" Kakashi asked suspiciously, eyeing the package. He sincerely hoped it wasn't some kind of food… Experience had told him to never, ever again eat anything in Jiraiya's house.
"I thought you should have something a little more…exciting to do in your pastime than train and such, or stare at the Memorial Stone," Jiraiya explained.
Jiraiya tore off the wrapping, holding out a small orange book to Kakashi. "You should be honoured! This is only the first book in my newly planned series! I've been researching it for years now, but I think the first one will be a big hit!"
"Wait, you wrote a book?"
Jiraiya nodded proudly. "Go on, take a look and see if you like it!"
"What would you write a book about…" Kakashi muttered as he reluctantly took the orange novel. Holding it up, he slowly opened the cover and flipped through a few pages, reading in some spots here and there. Jiraiya noted how his face grew continually redder as he skimmed through it.
"What kind of research have you been doing?" Kakashi slammed the book shut, his face returning to a normal hue. "I can't read this, it's…it's porn, for crying out loud!"
"It is not! Just a stunning story about love, passion, despair, heartbreak…" Jiraiya continued on.
"No wonder Minato-sensei didn't want me reading it," Kakashi observed darkly.
Jiraiya stopped talking, smirking at Kakashi. "I'll let you keep it. It is a tiny bit obvious, you know."
Kakashi's face tightened. "What's obvious?"
Jiraiya leaned close, whispering. "You like it, don't you?"
Once again, Jiraiya was pleased at how he could make the face of an apparently emotionless teen turn a blazing crimson.
The Toad Sage smiled to himself, satisfied that his work was done. His own student may not have fallen for it, but he had successfully recruited another fan.
Leaning over, he patted Kakashi on the back, grinning. "I'll let you know when more come out, okay? And please, don't let Minato know that I showed that book to you. He'd probably kill me for turning his student into a - "
Kakashi whirled his head around, giving Jiraiya one of his most ferocious and ice-cold glares, before he could finish his sentence.
Jiraiya gulped. That could outmatch any Uchiha.
Kakashi turned and began to walk away again, leaving a contented pervert in his wake. Jiraiya watched as Kakashi leaped onto the rooftops. He chuckled to himself. 'Never knew that kid would like that kinda stuff. But, he really does need something else to do other than train or fight. Heh. Figures.' Jiraiya headed off for the new hot springs he heard was in town, eager to do more 'research.'
"Hey, Kakashi-kun, what do you have there?"
Kakashi jumped, swiftly trying to pocket the orange book he was so intently reading.
Minato did not earn his nickname for nothing, however. In a flash, he had grabbed the book out of Kakashi's hands. "I never knew you were into books, Kashi-kun. Must be pretty interesting for you to not notice me." Minato stepped away from the tree he had been in, standing in front of Kakashi.
Kakashi jumped up from his position against the base of the tree, vainly trying to reclaim his novel, but Minato leaped out of reach again. The blonde jounin stared at the cover.
His student cringed when he heard the tone of Minato's voice. He discreetly began to slip away before his sensei could ask any questions. Unfortunately for him, Minato noticed and landed at his side before he could make his escape. He latched onto his arm to keep him from going anywhere.
"Do you realize what this is?"
"Why were you reading it?"
"Why do you even have it?"
"Where did you get it?"
"Did you buy it?"
Kakashi shook his head.
"Do you…like this stuff??"
Kakashi felt the blood rising to his face.
"You do like it, don't you!" Minato exclaimed, noticing Kakashi's reaction. "Wait…let me guess… Did Jiraiya give this to you?"
Kakashi said nothing.
"Did he?" Minato tightened his grip on Kakashi's arm, making his student squirm painfully.
Kakashi gave the slightest inclination with his head, hoping to fend off more injuries.
Minato groaned, releasing Kakashi, who rubbed his arm. He slapped a hand to his forehead. "I told that idiot not to get you involved with this stuff! It's not even appropriate for your age! Being so young, so susceptible, no wonder he got you hooked so fast! How long did it take, a few glances, a few pages? Kami, when I get my hands on him, I'll - "
"Um, sensei, can I have my book back?"
Minato stopped his ranting, looking at Kakashi in surprise. "What…did you say?"
"Can I have it back? I want to finish it."
Minato couldn't believe what he was hearing. Just great. Jiraiya had turned his student into a porn-loving pervert. He gave a resigned sigh. Reluctantly, he handed back the book to Kakashi. Once they were into it, there was no way they'd stop. Only one thing to do now. Give a talk to that idiot he called sensei.
Minato leaped away into the trees, leaving a blissful Kakashi to settle back against a trunk and continue his adventures in the wonderful world of Jiraiya's book.
"Ahem. Jiraiya-sensei."Jiraiya glanced up from where he had been snoozing on his porch. "Eh?" He held a hand up over his eyes to block out the sun, trying to see the figure in front of him.
Minato stepped beside Jiraiya. The Toad Sage did not like the look on his face.
"Ah, Minato, my favourite student. What brings you to my humble abode?"
The blonde jounin leaned closer to Jiraiya. "I met up with Kakashi this morning."
"Oh?" Jiraiya tried to sound genuinely surprised. He did not like the way this conversation was going.
"Guess what I found him with?"
"Why, whatever do you mean, Minato-kun?"
"I think you know perfectly well what."
Jiraiya smiled innocently.
"He was reading that book of yours. You know, the result of your research.' Minato's voice dripped with venom.
Jiraiya laughed nervously. "Oh, that. Hey, I thought he needed some variation in his life. Some excitement. It was only a present for being accepted into ANBU!"
"He does not need that kind of stuff filling his mind with ideas! Especially when he's going into ANBU! How is it going to affect his performance?" Minato raged.
"Don't worry about it. He's a good kid; I think he can handle it. Certainly seemed interested when he looked through it. Only took a couple of pages to get him hooked."
Minato threw his hands up in exasperation. "That stuff is practically illegal for his age! What would Sarutobi say if he knew one of Konoha's top ninja was suddenly interested in porn. And that the Toad Sage, no less, had been the cause!"
"You sure don't know Sarutobi very well, do you. Why, he asked for my book just the other day!"
Minato stared at Jiraiya.
"See, it must be some kind of special trait, passed down from teacher to student. Sarutobi, me, you, and now Kakashi." Jiraiya observed in a matter of fact tone.
Minato sputtered, his face growing red. "What are you talking about, me? I've never been interested in that kind of stuff!"
"Oh, really? I've seen you looking at the bookstands, Minato. Trust me, I'm pretty sure the trait didn't skip you." Jiraiya was pleased with the glow radiating from Minato's face.
"You may not admit it, but you're into it!" Jiraiya yelled as Minato started walking away, not wanting to get involved anymore. "It takes one to know one!" The Toad Sage chuckled as Minato disappeared. The trait was certainly true. He wondered if Kakashi would pass it to any of his students.
Jiraiya settled back into his chair, closing his eyes contently.
Ah yes, life was good.