Team Gai and Neji's cousin all made wishes the previous night on the first star in the sky, making the authoress smile slyly. Hinata wanted to be a pimp, Neji wanted a fashion sense, Lee only wanted to be loved, and TenTen really just wanted to suck face with a popular boy.
That wasn't too much to ask for, right?
There weren't any problems with their requests. There were small simple ways to get their wishes to come true, but none of them really wished for those to be the way that they could come true.
Sure, Neji and Lee could be Hinata's hoes. Hinata could dress Neji--- seeing as she still dressed her eight-year-old sister, she probably wouldn't have a problem. Lee could become Hinata's ho and get some 'good lovin'. And, TenTen could attack the poor Uchiha boy.
But, Lee and Neji had better things to do than get paid for having secks, only to have their salaries taken away. And, Neji would rather not be embarrassed by having his cousin squeeze his cheek in the morning and ask him if he wanted to wear purple, blue or pink that day. Lee really didn't want to be a prostitute. And TenTen… well… TenTen couldn't become one of the fangirls; she wouldn't stand out enough.
With that in mind, Hinata set off to become a pimp. She'd discovered the 'ways of the pimp' from a bunch of shows, movies, etc. and knew all she had to do was get a pimp coat and a hat. So, the young girl set off in search of both pieces. When she'd found and bought them, hoes did not magically appear, as the movies and shows had told her.
She sunk to her knees, before being told by Kiba and Shino that she needed a pimp cane and some 'bishies' to push around. The girl grinned, sending shivers up and down the duo's spines. They had regretted giving her the advice; since before they knew it, they were tied up and put up for an auction, butts pained from the amount of spanking she'd been giving them, courtesy of her brand new pimp cane, bishies.
Neji, the genius of the Hyuuga family, set off for Lee's apartment in hopes of training with the 'Green Beast'. When the young man arrived there, he'd expected to find Lee boisterously proclaiming that it was 'youthful' of the Hyuuga boy to stop by his home. With a sigh, he entered the home and looked around, finding strange pictures of flora that said 'peace' and 'love'. While in the home, he decided that he would ask Lee for help with his vexing 'problem'.
While in the sitting room, looking over a few plants, wondering what they were and what that strangely familiar aroma was, Lee burst through his door and tossed himself onto the couch. He caught sight of Neji and began a speech of 'youthfulness', 'youth' and the 'flame of youth'—it was all pretty much the same stuff over and over. Words were spoken, and before either of them could squeal 'uno' and show of their cards, the pair were in the bedroom, practicing for being Hinata's hoes, and Neji had a new green jumpsuit he was desperately trying to take off without ripping.
Well… with three problems finished, the authoress thought she'd done a good job. So, with that in mind—
"Oi! What the hell! What about me?!"
Sasuke looked from the sky to the panda girl and frowned at her. "Who are you talking to?" he asked.
"The author of this stupid fanfic," she replied, sounding rather insane, but serious.
"The one making you talk, baka," TenTen told him, hands planted firmly on her hips.
"Oh." He looked at the sky, seeing what he believed to be Kami-sama, and what TenTen seemed to be calling 'The Author'. He looked from the bun girl to the sky, waving at the teenaged-looking Kami. "Wanna make out?"
A/N: Well… I have nothing to say for this, other than I am sorry. This was pure crack. Totally random. And… Yes, I made fun of TenTen, but only because I love her. See, she gets her wish too.
So… review. Tell me how great I did! Or… laugh at how stupid this was. 'Cos… ya know what, it was pretty stupid. So… yeah. That's it.