This snippet arose from a comment I made on the Sheppard/Teyla thread. We were discussing the fact that an upcoming episode of Atlantis would involve a large bathtub in Rodney's quarters. I speculated a little about who might join him in said bathtub, and the response from one person in particular was especially disgusted… so I thought it only fair to write a fanfic about it for her reading pleasure.

So – Linda, this one's for you, darlin':-D

Splish Splash

Rodney felt the hot water undulate round him, caressing every inch of his body. He closed his eyes and rested his head back against the cool tile. He'd been rushed off his feet all day, putting out fires for the inept so-called scientists that worked for him. This was… this was deserved.

He sighed contentedly.

"Hello Rodney."

For a moment Rodney was sure he had imagined the voice. Teyla wasn't in his bathroom. He knew she wasn't. But he opened his eyes anyway.

Teyla was in his bathroom. And she wasn't alone.

"Hi there," said Jennifer.

Teyla and Jennifer smiled down at Rodney, who just gulped in surprise.

"My, you do look comfortable," said Teyla. Her voice was low and throaty, and her fingers skimmed the rim of the bathtub, a smile still playing on her lips.

"Mind if we join you?" Asked Jennifer. She reached up and hand and pulled her hair free from its elastic – it cascaded down around her shoulders as she smiled again.

Rodney looked between the smiling women, and said the only thing that seemed remotely sensible. "Sure."

Their smiles turned into delighted grins, and they immediately turned to face one another, hands reaching out to help the other get undressed. Rodney's jaw dropped slightly but he stayed quiet, just watching. He would have offered his assistance, but they seemed to… have it covered. Or uncovered.

Soon they were just standing there in their underwear, and both turned smiles on him again as they reached to unclasp their –


Rodney's eyes widened and he swore under his breath at the sudden knock on his bathroom door. Teyla and Jennifer looked startled and clutched their discarded clothes back up to their bodies. Rodney sat forward hurriedly.

"No – it's okay, don't worry they'll go away –"

Bang. "Rodney!"

Rodney's heard jerked up and his eyes flew open. "Wh-?"

"Shake it off buddy, we've got a briefing."

Rodney blinked, still trying to get his bearings. He was sitting on a stool at one of the tables in his lab, wearing his lab coat. There were research notes in front of him, and a post-it stuck to his cheek. He scowled and tore it away.

Sheppard was standing on the other side of the table, smirking slightly. "Come on," he said.

Rodney focused on him and his smirk. "I was… I hate you."

The smirk disappeared and Sheppard looked a little surprised for a moment. Then he shrugged. "Okay," he said. "But come on."

And he turned and walked out of the lab.

Rodney balled up the post-it he was still holding in his fist, and shook his head. Someone up there really didn't like him.

The End