it didn't even hurt

one second standing
the next discorporate

doesn't feel like it
feels wider awake than eternity

harry running

"how does it feel to be a godfather, padfoot"

nearly curtains for him now too

grab him

he's so tiny
no i shouldn't hold him
he'll break


good old moony
best of us all really

best of a sorry lot

clever padfoot

where has your cleverness gotten you now

like soot
like snivellus' oil-slick hair
like night
like dementors' o-round mouths
like black

no stars but one
brightest in the black sky

no how
no when
no why

could be tumbling
could be streaking like a long-haired comet
could be stuck stock still like a beetle pinned to a black card

no up
no here
no down
no there
no in
no out

no anywhere

big guilty scared black eyes in a white face

caught him doing god knows what with kreacher

kick the elf

hit the brother

eating rats in a cave for harry

laughing my arse off with james behind peter's back
he was so proud to be a rat

rats are dog food

so how did he end up eating us all

little white hands furtively smoothing down james' black hair
"it's always so messy, you prat"
little soft strokes
did she think he didn't know then

hands held his universe
always comes down to that in the end

her little white hands hold all the power
she's a pinpoint of fire in the dark that stretches and stretches
she pulled us all into her orbit
gravity well like a white dwarf

even remus looked
and hid behind his book
and looked

and turned away and didn't look
spent years and years not looking
clever lupin
but he still went round and round her too
just another moon

"say hello to your new brother, sirius"

don't need another
will have james already
in ten years or so

prongs and his lily
stag and his doe

stag's gone

african wizards knew her three thousand years ago

dogon tribe

little white hands pulling sirius into her orbit
into the centre of the sky

doe's gone

now dog's gone


maybe 8.6 light-years gone by now
wherever now is


i loved her too

"let me do it, padfoot"
never thought to ask where had he grown a pair all of a sudden
just relieved it wouldn't be me
even for her
for him

fire in heart
(water for limbs)
serpent family breeds serpent offspring
but not this one no never


little white hands reaching
angel voice laughing
"come on, you can do it, not far now"


white hands
white light

I'm home.