I don't own Naruto or its characters. This is just some of my inane thoughts on electronic paper. Hope whoever reads this can enjoy them. If not, oh well. Based off the new manga.

Ultimate Summons

Sasuke gasped as he saw his brother's last technique, Susanno. The giant phantom-like armor that saved him from Sasuke's ultimate lightning attack was truly an awe-inspiring jutsu. Sasuke knew that he could hold back no longer. It was time for that jutsu.

The younger Uchiha bit his thumb and spread the blood across a hidden seal on his arm. He was glad that he had already stored enough chakra into the seal to activate the summoning, Sasuke performed the requisite hand signs.

"What are you doing, foolish little brother?" Itachi asked lazily as he strolled towards Sasuke.

"Behold your doom Itachi! Ultimate Summoning Jutsu: FanGirl Army!" Sasuke screamed at his brother as he slams his hands to the ground. Smoke arose and numerous figures could be seen. As it cleared, thousands of young girls could be seen wearing t-shirts and holding banners proclaiming their devotion to one Uchiha Sasuke. "Not even Susanno can withstand this!"

Itachi closed his eyes and released Susanno. Sasuke looked on in puzzlement as his hated sibling chuckled and burst into a terrifying laugh. "An impressive jutsu little brother, but why must you always use someone else's techniques?"

Sasuke clenched his fists in anger, "What are you talking about? This was entirely my idea!"

Itachi shook his admonishingly, "No my foolish little brother, it is not." Itachi bit his thumb and wiped it across a seal on his own arm. "You are not the first to create such a jutsu. Ultimate Summoning Jutsu: FanGirl Elites!" A much smaller smoke cloud formed compared to Sasuke's but the result was no less terrible. Hundreds of older girls stood tall in matching "WE LOVE ITACHI" shirts, with various souvenirs wielded as deadly weapons. "Your rabble is no much for my elites, little brother."

The two brothers stared into each other's eyes and signaled their fangirls to attack simultaneously.


The two groups charged each other, screaming the names of their respective obsessions and profanities against his enemies. The larger but less experienced army was initially pierced by the well armed smaller army, but before long superior numbers took down several of the Elites. Despite losing some of their sisters of the cause, the Elites fought viciously, pulling hair and slapping the younger girls down. Terrible, terrible attacks reigned on this battlefield.

Sasuke stood on a rock cliff next to his brother. They looked on at the carnage they had unleashed and smiled.

Itachi took out a box of pocky and offered Sasuke a stick.


"No problem. Sorry about the whole, 'pluck your eye out' thing."

"Forget about it. Water?" Sasuke asked, pulling out two bottles from nowhere.

"Thanks. This is the good stuff, where'd you get it?"

"Suigetsu has a ton of these, I just swiped a couple."

"You do the Uchiha name proud little brother." The brothers enjoyed the view of the battling girls and sighed in unison wishing for rain.

"We should have done this a long time ago."

"Got that right. That avenger stuff was getting depressing. I finally discover hormones and Orochimaru shows up with his fanboy army. Jerk."

Itachi shivered beside him, recalling his own experiences with the Snake Sannin. "That's why I made my Fangirl Elites."

"Same here."

"Great minds. . . "

"Great minds."

Well there it is. OOC in the extreme, but that's what came to mind. Review, flame, gossip, or joke I don't really care. Scattered Dreams should also be updated today.