Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
A/N: Same warnings still apply.
Lifeline - Part 2
Posted on 17th March 2008
The next morning he resisted the urge to run from Heero. The sleepy, happy smile Heero gave him when he woke up and found Duo still next to him both terrified and comforted Duo.
He stayed jittery all day, keeping close to Heero and letting him know that he didn't regret the intimacy they had shared the night before… even though he did. He knew that he was in a difficult position, if he so much as hinted at Heero that he was in this relationship purely for the physical aspect of it, it would break Heero's heart. But if he didn't tell him that, then Heero would stay convinced that now they were 'official' and when he slipped up – because he was bound to slip up – Heero's heart would break anyway, worse than if he had told him.
Apparently it was only a matter of time. And either way Heero was going to get hurt. And all the possible consequences kept looping around in his head until he was edgy, jumpy and just plain nervous all day.
Heero was surprisingly patient. Duo knew Heero had noticed his edginess, but he didn't comment on it. If anything, he refrained from being too clingy which helped immensely.
A whole week went by like this. A fragile calm had settled between them and the tension was gone. There was even a little bit of playful banter between them at dinner time one day that ended with Heero having hair full of corn flour and Duo's hair clumped with grease.
Duo tried to pretend it was strictly friendly, but it ended with them both in the shower.
That day Duo had sex with Heero for the third time.
Soon after that Duo ran into Caleb down in the archives section. They were the only two people there and he realised that Caleb had grown fucking hot in the time they had been separate. They started talking, just friendly at first and slowly it dissolved into flirting. Before they knew it they were swallowing each other's tongues, pushed up against the shelves full of financial accounts and mission reports.
And began Duo's sordid affair.
Any place was fair game. Duo fucked Caleb more times than he could count. They fucked in the bathroom, the archives, back of the building, at Caleb's apartment… anywhere they felt like and could get away with it.
Duo's nervousness around Heero increased as his guilt increased. It was not cheating because they were not in a relationship, he told himself constantly. Funny enough, the longer it went on the easier it got to lie to Heero.
One thing that bugged Duo immensely was the fact that suddenly he found Caleb too loud. A small flick of Duo's tongue against his nipples had him moaning and groaning and screaming 'fuck yes'. One day Duo just stopped, looked at him and asked if he was faking it. The surprised look that Caleb shot Duo had him laughing.
Turns out he was not faking, that he was just plain loud. Duo liked his guys quiet, with breathy, husky moans and little gasps and hitched breaths.
Regardless, Caleb was hot and Duo didn't care much when he was inside him.
Duo had to be careful around Heero. He made sure he went in straight to shower when he came back after being with Caleb. He wouldn't put it past Heero to sniff out another man on him. Duo was terrified of the day that Heero found out. Not because he was afraid that Heero would do something stupid, but he was sure that everything would go to hell that day.
Ha! As if it wasn't bad enough. But the recent calm that he was endangering with his fucking around was precious to him. He liked having his friend back.
Things did go to hell. And it happened so suddenly that it left Duo gaping, shocked and surprised.
It was a calm night, the moon bright and the breeze warm. They had opened all the windows in the apartment enjoying the warm breeze moving through the rooms.
It had started with a small kiss and before they knew it, they were in Duo's bed Heero straddling Duo, rolling his hips as he breathed out his moans, deep and husky, his hisses and nonsense words hoarse.
Duo's hands were on Heero's strong chest, tracing the curves of his sculpted torso, hot with arousal and slick with sweat. Duo felt Heero's orgasm before he actually came, his body shuddered and Heero arched his back before gasping and coming. Duo followed closely after and pulled Heero down to his chest, kissing his hair and holding him tight.
Sometimes he wondered how he could not love Heero the way Heero wanted him to, when he felt so strongly for him. But he tried not to think about it too much.
"Mm…" Heero grunted and shifted a little, pulling out of Duo's arms. "Water…" He said as explanation, his voice still deep.
Duo smiled at him lazily. "Don't take too long." He grunted as Heero got up. Duo turned to his side, throwing a leg out to make himself more comfortable. Heero laughed softly and kissed his hip bone before leaving the bedroom, still naked.
Only a couple of minutes had passed before Heero slammed open the bedroom door, threw Duo's cell phone on him so hard that Duo yelped with the sudden sting and shot up in bed.
"What the fuck Heero!" He yelled but then froze suddenly when he saw the look in Heero's eyes. He was glaring at Duo, his gaze icy cold and his jaw locked.
"You have a message." He said and pulled on his discarded jeans in record time.
Duo stared at his cell and noticed that the message he was talking about was from Caleb.
"Heero—" Duo started but snapped his mouth shut when Heero sliced is hand through the air telling him to shut up. He could see his hand trembling faintly before he fisted it and stormed out of Duo's room and into his own.
Duo opened the message and read it, wondering what Caleb had said that had turned Heero's mood around so fast. 'Hey Duo, I didn't have the confidence to ask you this in person so I'm messaging you. Do you want to go steady? Because see… we're already together… and I want to be able to tell people, you know? Let me know what you think.'
"Fuck!" Duo swore angrily as he pulled out of bed and into the hallway just as he saw Heero pulling his shoes on. "Where are you going?"
Heero didn't answer him, instead tying his shoes even faster.
"Stop!" Duo said as he grabbed Heero's arm.
"Don't touch me." Heero hissed at him but Duo's hands only tightened.
"Listen to me Heero, let me explain. Come on…" He urged but he hadn't counted on Heero putting both his hands on Duo's chest and shoving him back hard. This time he was not pulling punches.
"Heero…" Duo said rubbing his sternum slightly where Heero had pushed him. In response to Duo's call Heero pushed him again, harder than before, and then again until Duo stumbled and his back hit the wall behind him.
"No. You don't get to say anything this time." Heero grated out. "I'm tired of this. No more."
"NO!" Heero yelled and Duo snapped his mouth shut. "No." He repeated softly. "You'll say something and make me believe you again. But not this time." He shook his head, his bangs falling in his eyes with the movement. "I've decided you're not worth it. You can't possibly be worth all this."
Duo swallowed, wondering why Heero's words hurt.
Heero turned around and started leaving. Duo felt a sudden inexplicable fear that Heero was leaving and he pushed forward, hurrying towards him.
Heero shot him a look from the front door. "Don't worry, I'll be back in time to cook you dinner." He spat, disgusted, before slamming the door closed, the bang echoing in the suddenly empty apartment.
Duo sank to his knees, put his head in his hands and pulled on his hair.
Well… that went well. Duo thought sarcastically.
Heero did come back in time to cook him a meal. But he didn't stick around to eat it with him. He said a small, curt 'dinner's ready' to Duo as he passed his bedroom and then left the apartment again.
He didn't come back until the next morning and quickly showered, shaved, changed his clothes and was back out again before Duo could say one word to him.
At work Duo tried talking to Heero since they shared the same office. Heero resolutely ignored every word he said and then when he dissolved into pleading and begging Heero pulled out a pair of headphones and blasted music. Heero hated listening to loud music and yet he would bear that if it meant he could ignore Duo.
Duo's heart constricted, and he didn't know why.
In the cafeteria Heero caught Duo and Caleb talking and the look he shot the both of them nearly made Duo pee himself. Caleb was rightfully freaked out and he spent the rest of the day trying to hide from Heero, even though he had no idea why.
It was times like these that Duo was reminded why Heero was one of the best Preventeer Agents they had. Living with the guy dulled his idea of what Heero was capable of.
Heero left for home before Duo did. When Duo got home, Heero had left and there was food on the counter.
For the first time in several years, Duo felt like crying.
Things didn't get better as the days wore on. If anything, Heero receded even more. He couldn't even bear to be in the same room as Duo anymore and he would leave immediately. He was constantly bitter and angry. He even blew up on a well-meaning Quatre and told everyone to 'leave him alone'.
He didn't make anyone worry any less, but he did scare them off enough that no one approached him again. Instead they approached Duo who snarled at them so viciously that they left him alone too.
Then he started hearing rumours.
He always considered water-cooler conversations as the worst kinds. Pure gossip that served no other purpose than to hurt. This one particular conversation caught his attention though, and he was forced to hide to the side and eavesdrop.
He recognized the two men hanging around there. They were those macho older agents that usually despised the Gundam pilots just because they were younger and had a higher rank than them. One of them was feeling particularly boisterous today.
"Yuy and Maxwell are rocky right now, ya hear?" He said.
"Been hearing something… but I'm afraid of messing with them. If we fuck with one of them while they're still involved…" The other commented.
"No, they're not involved." The first agent said loudly, confident. Duo frowned with worry.
"How are you so sure?"
"Because…" Duo could pretty much feel the glee that came with that one word. "Because I fucked Yuy this afternoon."
"No way man! I don't believe you."
"Don't believe me? I left a mark on 'im. He has a hickey on his neck, left side." The man gloated.
"When? How the hell?"
Duo heard the first agent huffing with pride. "Just walked up to him and asked him. He said yes."
"So you just walked up to Agent Yuy, ex pilot of Wing, and said 'can I fuck you?' and he said 'yes'?"
"I'll make a believer out of you yet! I walked up to him, whispered in his ear all low and seductive and said, 'you're real pretty' and I placed one hand on his hip like that." There was a second's pause. "Then he said 'you want me?' and I was surprised because I expected him to hit me ya know?"
"Yeah, I know."
"And instead he asked me if I wanted him! So I said 'fuck yeah' and then he led me to the bathroom and god dude! He is tight!"
Duo felt himself getting sick, thick acidic bile rising in his throat as he listened to them.
"No way, you're making it up."
"Seems that way doesn't it? But I'm not! And he has this breathy moan, all husky and hoarse. It's like he almost moans every time and then breaks it off in the middle! It's really fucking hot."
Duo rubbed his face hard, surprised when he found himself sweating.
"Fuck man, you think if I asked him he'd let me?"
"Word is he won't refuse anyone. Try your luck."
Duo walked into the cubicle then, beat the shit out of the two agents until they were begging for mercy and his knuckles were bloody, then stalked towards his office.
Entering he saw Heero typing up a report but as soon as he saw Duo his fingers stalled and he glanced up at him warily. Duo dashed forward, swivelled Heero's chair around so that he was facing Duo and then grabbed his collar unbuttoning it with shaking fingers. All this time Heero let him.
Once the button was open and the collar pushed to the side, Duo's eyes took in the rather large red-purple bruise forming on the left side, just above where Heero's neck met his shoulder.
"You fucking slut." Duo spat at him and Heero didn't even flinch. Heero grabbed Duo's hands where they were gripping his collar and ripped them off. Then he turned around in his chair and returned to working.
"This is dangerous Heero! You can't just let anyone… You can't just…" Duo said frustrated, and he turned around, taking deep breaths to calm himself down. "You just can't."
Heero didn't say anything, just kept looking at him blankly until Duo huffed and returned to his desk to sulk the rest of the day.
He felt fear growing in the pit of his stomach but he found out that he could do nothing to help Heero. That he had fucked himself over and there was nothing left to do anymore.
The resignation only added to the fear.
Duo's attack on the agents didn't get overlooked and he got into a fair bit of trouble, but he could care less.
It all came to an end when one day Duo received a phone call from the hospital. Heero had been found beaten bloody and unconscious. There were signs of rape and he had been rushed to the hospital. Their first and foremost worry was his head injury, and that he had lost a lot of blood.
Duo broke every speed limit trying to get to the hospital in time.
He paced the hallway outside Heero's room, afraid of going in and seeing Heero bandaged up and hooked up to a dozen tubes, feeding him blood and glucose and antibiotics.
Quatre, Trowa and Wufei came a little while later. This time when Quatre hugged him, Duo broke down into tears.
"It's all my fault. All my fault. All mine." Duo sobbed and all Quatre did was shush him as he rocked him back and forth gently.
Trowa's hand on his shoulder was strong and Wufei's presence near him was solid. They vowed to find who had done that to Heero and punish them accordingly.
Duo wondered if he should be punished right along with the rapists.
While Heero slept. The ex-pilots worked together to find the culprits. They were surprised when they turned out to be agents at the HQ.
Heero's reputation as the local slut had spread quickly. Heero was a gorgeous guy, and everyone wanted a piece of him. When the rumours reached a wrong group of men who wanted Heero badly, they didn't bother asking.
Few of the men involved jumped at the chance of a more lenient sentencing if they confessed. They told them that it had started with just one guy fucking Yuy. But the rest quickly got impatient and all too soon the sex had turned into gang rape.
When Heero had fought them, the strongest of them had slammed his head against the wall, knocking him out. Then it had been a free for all.
Trowa had to restrain Duo from bashing the guy's skull in.
The confession caused all the men to be court marshalled and jailed for sexual assault, rape and battery.
All the tests for STDs came back negative. Heero had escaped one possible hell. Now they all waited for him to wake up.
It took him two weeks. Duo fell asleep next to Heero's bed, his head on mattress, and one hand holding Heero's. When he woke up he saw Heero's eyes open, blinking sleepily at him.
Duo, convinced that he must be dreaming, pinched his arm several times until it turned red and raw. Once he had assured himself that Heero really had woken up he called for the nurse, called Quatre to tell him Heero was awake, and then proceeded to kiss every inch of Heero he could access.
The team of doctors that swarmed in pushed Duo out of the room as they took Heero's stats, his blood pressure, heart rate and reflex, asked him inane questions like 'what year is this?', 'do you know your name?' and 'where do you think you are?'.
Heero passed all the tests, he had healed without adverse affects of the head injury. The first thing he said to Duo was 'I'm hungry', and Duo had laughed so hard that he had cried. Then he had dashed to get Heero everything he may have wanted to eat – burgers, fries, steamed vegetables, it didn't matter. He bought everything he could get his hands on. All Heero ate was some soup and a couple of pieces of the steamed vegetables. Duo had been so happy he felt like he would burst.
Two days later the doctors proclaimed him ready to leave. That night, Duo crawled into Heero's bed as he slept and hugged him tightly.
The next day Duo proceeded to cook lunch. He sucked at it, but damnit he was going to try.
While he struggled with trying to chop the vegetables all the same size, Heero came into the kitchen, movements still a little stiff as his body recovered from being in the same position for too long. He came and leaned against the counter Duo was working on.
"You're worth it." He said his voice still a little rough but much better than yesterday. Duo shot him a confused look and Heero elaborated. "I was worried that the last thing I said to you would be that you weren't worth it. You are." He cleared his throat. "And I'll always love you. Nothing you can do will make me stop loving you."
Duo swallowed thickly, looking at Heero's profile as he talked. The knife slipped out of his fingers and clattered against the chopping board loudly in the silence that followed Heero's words. He touched the side of Heero's neck lightly, pushing his face towards him as he leaned forward. He kissed Heero softly, his lips barely grazing Heero's.
"I'm sorry." Duo whispered against his mouth and Heero nodded.
"Me too." Heero whispered back then he pulled away. "You're with Caleb now… right?" He asked in a casual tone but Duo could detect a small tone of... something else there.
"No. Never again. No one but you." Heero looked at him, pulling back with eyes a little narrowed, rightfully suspicious. "No, no Heero. I'm not lying. I won't go back on it. I won't cheat on you or run away from you. I spent the last two weeks wondering if you'll live or die, and if I'll ever see you again. This time if you left, I knew there was nothing I could do to bring you back."
Duo laughed a little then, the sound broken and wet. "Makes a man think, you know?" Duo shrugged slightly, "Made me wonder how life would be without you… and it sucked! And it wasn't because I'll have to cook my own meals or do my own laundry or clean the place up myself. It was stupid things like the sound of your breathing would be gone, the sound of you flipping a page as you read, the way you would smile when it snowed, the sound of my name when you say it…" Duo blinked quickly trying to keep his eyes dry.
"In the last two weeks, I spent every day wondering if this time when you left, you'll leave all your things behind, your bed still unmade, your toothbrush still in the bathroom and your blue towel still hanging behind the door. That this time, you'll leave your clothes in the closet and your scent in the room. And I realised how much I'll miss you if you left."
Slowly Duo tugged on Heero arm and pulled him close, hugging hesitantly like it was the first time they had hugged. "It made me realise that if you died, then I'd die too. You're my lifeline Heero, and I don't think I could live without you."
Heero wrapped his arms around Duo, holding him tightly against himself, Duo's warmth seeping into his chest and everywhere they touched. "I love you Duo." He whispered.
Duo smiled into Heero's hair. "I love you too 'Ro."
End. (This time for real)
A/N: So yeah, it's done. When I wrote Beyond Repair I hadn't expected it to branch out into this many parts but it took out my urge to write something super angsty with a happy ending so I'm kind of glad it went that way. I hope you guys enjoyed reading this as much as I had fun writing it. Review please? Coz they make me feel nice and I am obsessed with them. XD
Hope you liked!
Until next time,