Disclaimer : I do not own Naruto, you silly. I MARKED him. With Sasuke's spit.

Summary : Sasuke Uchiha is not a heterosexual, not a homosexual, nor an asexual. Sasuke Uchiha, the great prodigy of Uchiha clan is… a Naruto-sexual. And the truth to be told.. Extreme silliness. NOT FOR CHILDREN TO READ.

A/N : …why the hell I posted a one-shot instead of updating ST, you ask? Well… -scratches her head- Currently have no mood to write it so…and my boredom and I produced another piece of silliness… -. um, think of it as an appetizer? ;) (excuses, excuses…will this authoress ever be responsible?) Warning: And overly perverted Sasuke, language, OOCness, and humor!

A Naruto-sexual

I woke up early in the morning when I noticed my little (or I must say, BIG) penis is having an extremely unpleasant morning wood. It was the third time of this week.

I grunted as I poked my very hard, raging red hot rode that quivered at my touch. Oh my poor, poor little (BIG) penis… it's so long and thick and hairy and in a very flattering size, such a pity you don't have a sheath to relieve yourself, hmm? But I know what it is you would like to have as a perfect sheath. Oh yes, my dear, I know.

The dream was turning you on? I know, my penis, for it still turning me on even after I awaked. We both love his tight little hole, aren't we? The best part was when we cooperate to screw our little blonde's brain out, right? Yes, yes, I remember how good it felt, how tight, how hot it was…

Fuck, I'm gonna cum if I keep these naughty thoughts in my head.

Let's relieve you first, shall we?

I went to the bathroom and positioned my raging hard-on to the off-white porcelain toilet hole and began running my cold, cold fingers around the hot, quivering male materiel. I rubbed the wet slit as it kept spewing little dribbles of pre-cum, staring at my big manhood with love and sympathy.

Ah, my poor, poor virgin penis… I'm sorry this morning I only have my hand to relieve you, if only I can coax my beautiful, sexy, fuckable blonde to accept you and your litters like in the dream, you would've been happy and content… and me too. At least after three to five rounds of hot, steamy, kinky mansex a day… and night. I won't wish for more…

I began stroking my raging hard-on, screwing my eyes shut and imagining it was my lovely dobe's hand. Mmmhh… Naruto… Such a wonderful hand-job, yes, faster… ooh, you're so good, my sweet kitsune… if only you can put your mouth in instead of your hand—oh Gods—I can die happily… Hhmm…more, Naruto… Yes, yes…

I screamed the dobe's name as I spurt my seeds into the toilet hole, some spilt messily to the floor. I panted harshly as I rode my orgasm, even when I'm done I'm still thinking of my cute dobe…he's driving me crazy…

I then showered and prepared to meet with my lovely Naruto (and other extras) at the usual place.

Walking down the street, I thought of the last erotic dreams I had this past few weeks. Hmm… Naruto…the way you writhed in my touch…when I pounded into you so deliciously wild…oh my sweet, little fuckable kitsune, I could never be turned on by anyone but you…not by any woman, not by any guy, only you, my dear…you make me so obsessed over you…

Do you know how sexy your erotic blue eyes looked when I purposely annoyed you? How your red, luscious lips looked so ravishable whenever you're angry? How your sweet, little tight ass wriggling around as you walked ahead of me? Mmm… my hard, throbbing penis and I just wanted to jump on you right there and then! Let us make little Uchiha babies, dearest Naru-chan…

"Yo, morning, teme!"

I saw my Naruto greeted me with his cute, sexy voice, I heard another voice greeted me too, but I felt it was from miles away, and I am too preoccupied by my kitsune's beautiful appearance…

He was talking to the pink-mass beside him, and I stared at his sexy, curvaceous ass of his. Such a tight, perky ass…so cute and fuckable, I felt my pants getting tighter…no, my dear penis, not now, we can't have it unless we're alone, or with my Naru-chan in our bed…calm down, Sasuke's penis…

"Teme, let's spar, I'm bored!" My cute kistune whined.

God, I love it when he does that, his lower lip goes all pouty and kissable, his big blue eyes looked so sexy and erotic like a puppy's…I want to pounce at him… Ugh, calm down, Sasuke's penis! Must not have a raging hard-on in a place like this! Must not pounce at him in front of the pink blob!

But I wonder what's under those obnoxious pants of his…I wonder how would it feels like when I have my hands on his cute little bums…were it soft? Or firm? If only I could just rip it away, pinched it, stroking his hard, hard length as we have rounds of heavy, steamy, wild sex…I'm on top and he's on bottom…perfect.

"…teme? Hellooo? Earth to Sasuke?"

Ooh…I love it when he called my name…especially if he screamed it passionately in his peak of climax, which I was the cause, and me, spurting my hot seeds into his hot, tight inside…then we'll restart our activity again, and again, until I impregnated my sweet little kitsune and we'll establish a new generation of Uchiha-Uzumaki clan together…

Dammit, I'm hard. Very.

"Um, teme? My face is up here!"

He sounded scared so I looked up to his beautiful face, he looked so cutely confused that I wanted to kiss all over his face and reassure it'll be fine…which I may have to say when we're about to make love for the first time…which will be happened in the near future.

"Hn. Fine." I answered coolly.

We left the daydreaming pink-mass (I don't know why she did it so often) and entered the forest where a training ground was. I walked behind my kitsune and me and my hardened penis felt so turned on at the sight of his wriggling firm ass…God…I almost couldn't hold the urge to jump on him and ravish him right there and then…Mm! Calm down, Sasuke's libido…and Sasuke's raging hard penis. I think we need a cold shower…

We reached the training ground and my dobe immediately took a battle stance, he shouted something about defeating me, but I didn't hear him, I was thinking of how I could fit my little (BIG) penis into his sexy virgin hole…perhaps it's better to use fingers first? Or just roughly pound into him dry? Both ways are fine, actually… I vaguely noticed he was forming hand seals, and shouted his usual Kagebunshin no jutsu, when…

Blood streamed down my nose.

Oh, my fucking God—Naruto was standing there, completely and utterly (and deliciously) naked. I felt my jaw dropped and my eyes widened at the sight of barely clothed body…I greedily sucked every detail of the hard muscles of his stomach, his cute little dusky rose tits, his slender, hairless legs… Fuck, I think I'm going to die from both blood-loss and cum-restriction…

He squeaked cutely as he tried to cover his entirely exposed body, adorable tints of crimson tainted his scarred cheeks. He screamed erratically as his palms trying to cover his private organ and chest…cursing something about Konohamaru's prank…I couldn't hear it well, I was busy staring at his exposed manhood eagerly, imagining my fingers around it…how I would tease him a lot before we go to the next level… I noticed my pants were getting tighter and tighter…gradually becoming harder and painful! …I couldn't take it anymore!

I took a step forward.

My kitsune jumped in surprised, his beautiful eyes met mine fearfully. "S-Sasuke? Wh-why are you staring at me like that? Stop looking, you pervert!"

My dearest penis…let's thank the God, shall we? Sasuke's penis will finally have what it wants… and Sasuke Uchiha will finally have what he had been wanting for years…Mmm…Naru-chan, come to Papa, little one…

"S-Sasuke? What the fuck-?

My beautiful, cute kitsune…how I've wanted you for so many years, and now you will be mine alone forever…I'll make sure you'll feel good…come here, baby…Papa won't hurt you…let's have lots and lots of Uchiha babies!

"Sasuke, this isn't funny! …Where the fuck are you touching!? P-put your hands elsewhere! You're not supposed to be touchy! S-stop… teme! ..n-no……aa……aaahhh…"

Sasuke Uchiha is not a heterosexual, not a homosexual, or an asexual. Sasuke Uchiha is…a Naruto-sexual. He never meant for another.

…and his penis finally got its eternal sheath.



A/N : This getting worse, my sense of humor is just so…perverted. -. Please notice that this fic is only for laugh, and not supposed to be read by innocent children! Protect your last remaining innocence!

…or was it too late to say this?

Ja, Mata Ne!