Bleach is created by Tite Kubo and distributed by Weekly Shonen Jump,
Shueisha, Studio Pierrot, TV Tokyo, Adult Swim, & Viz Media LLC.
Should Kubo, or any of his affiliates, request it, this not-for-profit
story will be taken off line as quickly as possible.
Any original characters, however, are owned by me. If you steal them, I
shall hunt you down and skewer your nuts.
Feedback is encouraged. That's why I write. Also for the cookies.
And The Root Beer. The sweet, nectar-of-the-gods root beer.
Flames are pointless, as the author is a flaming retard.
...hold up, that's not what I meant. Uh, let's just start the story.
"Oh, this shit is NOT gonna fly."
Ichigo let off a small sigh as he looked at
his girlfriend with a look of understanding,
"That's what I told her. But little miss
pain-in-my-ass says she needs to be close
to me in case a hollow shows up."
"Yeah, I just bet she does." Tatsuki
muttered under her breath.
"I don't see what the problem is here."
Rukia shrugged," As oversexed as today's
youth is a man and a woman living
under the same roof is no big deal.
At least that's what I've read."
Tatsuki turned to Rukia, "That's only when
they're old enough to do such things, old hag.
Not when they're fifteen."
Rukia's eye twitched, "Old... hag? Did you just
call me an old hag?"
Ichigo blanched as he looked between Rukia's frown
and Tatsuki's smirk, swearing he could feel a very
oppressive aura in his room.
"Yeah, I did. You said you were a hundred and fifty right?
You're practically ancient, mummy dear."
Ichigo gulped and started to slowly make way for
his bedroom door, 'Oh shit, this does NOT bode
well for me.'
Rukia's eye twitched faster as Tatsuki continued,
"Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if you did try to
seduce MY Ichigo with that whole 'stay close in
case a hollow shows up' bs."
Ichigo gulped as he noticed Rukia's face scrunched up even more.
That Tatsuki didn't notice [or more likely didn't care] did
nothing for his heart.
"You must've really been hard up to come up with that excuse.
I can see that, being as old as you are."
Rukia's teeth grounded at that comment, "...You little brat. Where
the HELL do you get off with saying that to me?!?"
Tatsuki smirked. "Facts are facts, bitch. You're old and scrawny. That
you've picked on my boyfriend only shows that you're tastes aren't
completely worthless, however your ideas of staying close are
embarrassingly childish". Tatsuki laughed.
Ichigo had gulped a third time for luck as he was in mere fingertips reach
of the doorknob, 'Yessire, definitely time to go. Dontlookback,dontlookback,
The boy paused and let off a sickly grin as he looked back to the
center of his bedroom, 'Ah, fuck me sideways.' "Y-yeah, Tatsuki?"
"Don't. Touch. That. Doorknob."
"W-wh-why not, babe? It's my room, right?" The confident smile
he tried to put up did not quite reach his face as he turned back
Tatsuki turned to Ichigo and gave him a dark smile that caused the
boy to look like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming
freight train, " Face up to your own problems like a man, OK?"
Ichigo slumped down to the floor, defeated. He let off a silent prayer to
God and his mother that the next life would be nice and comfortable,
"Yes,dear." 'I am so whipped', he silently bemoaned, 'And not in the
Tatsuki then turned back to Rukia, "As for you... If you think for one second I'm
gonna let you stay here, you're outta yer goddamn mummified mind chick."
Rukia glared up at Tatsuki, "Well then little miss prim and proper, what do
you suggest we do?"
Tatsuki glared at Rukia before shoving her aside to walk towards Ichigo's room.
Not sparing her boyfriend a look she opened his door and walked to his closet.
Ichigo blinked, "Tatsuki.... what are you doing?"
Not responding she opened the closet and took note of the bed and contents.
Her face briefly darkened as her mind registered just how close this hag was
to her boyfriend.
Ichigo's eyes widened as he saw his girlfriend practically rip out the contents
of the closet.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?", Rukia screeched.
"Evicting you," Tatsuki said as if explaining it to a child.
"Not that I'm complaining babe", Ichigo pointedly ignored Rukia's ire now
being directed at him, "but where's chibi-gami gonna stay at?"
Ichigo stared as he watched his closet being gutted. Considering Tatsuki's
words before elegantly coming up with, "Come again?"
Tatsuki stopped the gutting of Ichigo's closet to stare flatly at her boyfriend,
"Do you want her in your place?"
"And there's no way in hell I'm gonna let this old mummy stay in your room any longer."
"I AM NOT A MUMMY, YOU BRAT!" Rukia retorted.
Tatsuki ignored her, naturally, "So, if she absolutely HAS to stay here, she's gonna stay
where I can always keep my eye on her 24/7. Understand?"
Ichigo nodded warily. Anything to get back on her good side.
Rukia on the other hand was doing her best to reign in her temper. "And just
how... exactly do I go along with you on this?"
Tatsuki smirked at the shinigami, "Who said you had a choice in the matter?"
Tatsuki then twisted the knife further. "You have none of your fancy Chibi-gami
strength, right? Meaning you're just a regular helpless little girl. Not that I enjoy
picking on the weak, mind you, but I'll make a very welcome exception for you.
Don't you feel honored?"
Rukia grumbled under her breath as Tatsuki continued to gut out Ichigo's closet
of her presence, "...Damned Gigai. Damned expensive Kikonchan. Damn it all."
"This is one of those 'get worse before it gets better scenarios' ain't it?"
Ichigo asked himself.
"Worse" - "Better", came the two different replies. Tatsuki beat Rukia to the explanation.
"You get your life back, Berry-tan. I get this scrawny thing who, if she knows what's good
for her won't cause any problems for me."
"And should a hollow appear?", Rukia challenged Tatsuki's answer.
"Then you better be damn quick at contacting him", Tatsuki smoothly answered,
taking the last few items out. She dusted off her hands as she finished gutting Ichigo's
closet and gave Rukia a look of triumph, "Besides, ain't that what Kon's for?"
Rukia frowned even deeper as she had forgotten about that little detail in all the arguing
she had been doing with Tatsuki. Dammit, defeated in all areas. Rukia then blinked in surprise
as she felt a poke on her bottom. She slowly turned to find Kon, still in his dog body,
nose on her bottom, "....What do you think you're doing?"
Kon grinned as sheepishly as a dog could, "Saying Hello?"
As Rukia cracked her knuckles, Kon reflected to himself that this was not as good of an
idea as he thought.
As Rukia began to knock Kon out of the dead dog's body to Tatsuki's laughter, Ichigo
sighed to himself, 'I wonder what a normal person's love life is like.'
Sadly, he wouldn't know the answer to that question for a good, long while.
A Bleach Story
Stranger Than Fiction
Chapter Five: Free from work, now let´s chill
Ichigo sighed as he pocketed Kon's mod soul capsule in his back pocket,
"Did you REALLY need to go that far?"
Rukia turned and glared at Ichigo, causing him to back up slightly as the trio
made their way down the stairs, "Hey, I'm just sayin' ya went a little far.
Now I gotta find a new body for this guy."
Tatsuki nodded, "Really, that was very rude of you. All that stuffing and all
he wanted to say was hello. Probably the most action you've seen in god knows how
Rukia glared down Tatsuki in response, "You shut up! I still can't believe you expect
me to go through with this...."
Tatsuki turned around and glared right back at the shinigami, "You bet your ass you're
doing this. Like I said, you're outta your mind if you think I'll let you just stay in my
boyfriend's closet for one day, one hour, one second, one
millisecond longer than you already have."
"And I still don't see what the problem is?", muttered Rukia.
"The fact that you don't see the problem is all the more reason that you need to
"Hardly. You assume a relationship that doesn't exist."
"I don't care if it exists or not! I'm ending it here and now! So what if you gotta
run a block or two, that's what phones are for, chibi-gami!"
"If you've spent the time like I have with him you'd know that having that isn't enough.
Being away will take more time than we can afford, and we lose a lot already!"
Tatsuki walked up to Rukia and loomed down on her face, "Whadda mean 'spending time'?!
No, don't tell me, cause your ass is out! You don't gotta choice in the matter!"
Rukia stopped and raised an eyebrow at Tatsuki, causing the taller girl's to twitch.
"Your lover has a habit of needing to be pulled into a situation, often lamenting it
in spite how decently he has performed."
"What're you getting at?"
"That if I'm not here to pull him along when a job calls he's likely to ignore it or wait
until the last minute or manage to show up too late".
"So you think that if you're not here, he'll just sit on his ass and let those souls get eaten
by those hollow things?"
Ichigo frowned, "Could you at least not talk about me like I'm not here?"
"Have I said anything untrue", Rukia asked the ignored shinigami substitute.
Tatsuki then chuckled, "If you honestly think that, then you don't know Ichigo
as well as you think."
"Having lived along side him for the last few weeks I can say that it may be you how
doesn't know him as well you think".
Tatsuki blinked, then frowned DEEPLY. ".... What did you say?"
Rukia looked Tatsuki in the eye. I said, 'having lived along side him for the last few
weeks I can say that it may be you how doesn't know him as well you think'.
Tatsuki barely contained herself from grinding her teeth in rage, "....I'm sorry....
My hearing's not a good as it should be. Could you say that.... ONE more time?!"
Rukia again raised an eyebrow. "I do not understand how you've missed it twice
now, but fine. I said, 'having lived with him for some time now, watching him
fight, dragging him to each location, that it is most likely you who doesn't know
him as well as you think'. Do you get it now?"
Tatsuki nodded as she retreated her fist from Rukia's face, "Yeah, I get it now.
Thanks for clearing that up."
Ichigo looked down at Rukia's comatose form before looking at his girlfriend
and frowning, "Babe... did you really need to go that far?"
Tatsuki snorted as she lifted Rukia up and over her shoulder, "Of course I did."
Ichigo sighed as his girlfriend left his home.
The first thing Rukia noticed as consciousness came back to her, was that her jaw was aching
like crazy. Damn, but could that girl punch. She really needed to work on that temper of hers.
The second thing she noticed as her eyes opened was that whoever was looking down on her was
triggering all sorts of warnings for some god-only-knows why reason.
"Are you ok?" the man asked.
She nodded slowly in confirmation, and the man let of a deep sigh of relief, "Oh thank goodness!
After Tat-chan told me your story, I was so worried I didn't know what to do! But now that you're
awake I can ask you directly!"
She eyed the man curiously, "Ask me what?"
"How do you want me to mutilate him?!"
Rukia blinked. "Excuse me", she asked uncertainly.
"Your jackass of a father. With this beautiful body, I can torture him in ways that are unsuitable
for your pure and dainty little mind to comprehend! Don't you worry Ruru-chan! You can stay here
for as long as you need!"
He then grasped her hands as manly tears began to flow freely from his eyes, "You have the Shuya seal
of approval! Consider me your new daddy, Ruru-chan!"
"'Ru-ruru chan...'", she repeated, before turning her head to find Tatsuki looking at her, appearing
as if she were struggling to hide her amusement.
"That's right Ruru-chan!" Shuya nodded enthusiastically before hugging Rukia tightly to his chest, "It's
all right! Let it all out on daddy's manly chest! I'm here for you Ruru-chan!" Rukia punched Shuya's
stomach, but the man didn't notice as he continued to hold the shinigami tightly to his bosom, "You
don't have to hurt no more, my little one! You're safe here. Daddy will always protect you!"
A tap on his shoulder caused Shuya's manly tears to stop flowing slightly and turn to find his wife
smiling serenely at him. He returned the smile, "Oh, Tomo-chan! Look! We have a new daughter! Isn't
"She also isn't breathing, dear." Tomoyo noted.
Shuya blinked in surprise before letting go of the hug, "Oh, I'm sorry Ruru-chan! Daddy just doesn't
know his own strength sometimes!"
Rukia found her self coughing before gasping for breath, overwhelmed.
Tomoyo rubbed Rukia's back as she regained her breath, "Are you ok, Rukia-chan?"
Shuya laughed heartily, "Of course she is, Tomo-chan! She my second daughter! And you know that the
Arisawa bloodline is a strong one!" He then turned to Tatsuki, a serious look on her face, "Tat-chan.
You're a big sister now. I'm counting on you to look after your little Ruru-chan!"
Tatsuki's eye twitched briefly. "Don't worry daddy, Tat-chan will take *real* good care of Ruru-chan".
He smiled and gave his daughter a thumb's up, That's my girl. Make your daddy proud and develop that
sisterly bond!" He stood up and walked to his personal weight room, "I'll leave you girls alone so
you can have your girl talk. Enjoy!"
Rukia eyed Shuya oddly as he left the room. She sighed and turned to Tatsuki, "Your father is a very
Tatsuki sighed, "Don't remind me, shorty."
Tomoyo sighed, "Well, I'm going to get dinner ready girls. And Rukia-chan, despite how my husband came off,
I do agree that you're welcome to stay here for as long as you need to."
Rukia blinked at her as Tomoyo left the room. Once the door was shut she turned to Tatsuki. "Stay"?
She gave Rukia a half lidded stare and folded her arms at the question, "What part of 'you're not staying in
my boyfriend's closet' did you miss chibi-gami?"
"I thought I explained why I needed to be close", she then paused before rubbing her jaw. "I see that you
have again assumed my reasons for doing so where of a different sort".
She snorted in response, "Don't care. It ain't proper and it ain't right So you'd best learn how to use a
phone, shrimp or learn how to get your powers back really freaking' fast if you wanna be outta here ASAP. Until
that happens, however, your ass is staying here. And I don't care how you feel 'bout that. That's just the
way it is."
She smirked darkly at Rukia, "So you'd best learn to like it, Little sister."
Rukia snorted, "You're being ridiculous."
Tatsuki snorted in response, "And you're being stubborn."
"I am not being stubborn. I am concerned for the welfare of this town if it's only protector isn't able or
willing to take care of the situation unless I have to drag him there".
She shrugged, "I dunno about able, but if you don't think Ichigo's all that willing... then maybe it wan't
the job, but the boss."
She shot an eyebrow up at that, "What's that supposed to mean?"
She just smirked again in response, "Why don't you think about it over dinner? You got plenty of time considering
that you'll be here for a while."
Rukia paused. "How long have I been here?"
"Hmmm... about an hour and a half."
Rukia pulled out her cellphone and checked for messages. Finding none she sighed in relief before putting it away.
Tatsuki eyed the device curiously, "Is That how you know about those hollow things attacking?"
Rukia nodded, "Yes, that's right."
"Can you call Ichigo with that?"
"Yeah. Y'know call him on the hone, let him know a hollow's attacking?"
She blinked, "Phone?"
"You don't know what a phone is?"
Rukia's blank look was her only response. Tatsuki sighed and held her hand out, "Let me see that."
Rukia gave Tatsuki and odd look before complying. Tatsuki looked at the device for a moment before
dialing a few numbers into the device and placing it to her ears.
-Tatsuki? Did you get a new phone or something? You didn't show up on the caller I.D.-
"Something like that. Just wanted to see if this worked or not. I'll talk to ya later, ok. Dinner's almost
ready over here."
-Alright then. Later,babe.-
Tatsuki hung up and smirked at the shinigami, "Well what do you know, it is a phone. So you can call his ass
when a hollow shows up. No need to hole up in his closet." She tossed it back to Rukia. She caught it as
Tatsuki opened up the door to her room, "Dinner's almost ready. Can't stay there forever shorty."
Rukia blinked for a moment before frowning in thought, This would be trickier than she thought.
"Man, I'm stuffed! Mama's cooking's always good to knock me out!"
Rukia nodded as Tatsuki patted her full belly, "Yes. Your mother's
cooking is quite good."
Tatsuki simply smiled in satisfaction, "See, living here ain't so
bad is it?"
Rukia frowned slightly at that, "I still don't understand."
Tatsuki's smile faded and was replaced with a neutral look, "What's
there not to understand?"
"Why you're so insistent on me not staying with Ichigo. To ensure
he's doing his duty."
Tatsuki sighed in annoyance, "You're still harping on about that..."
"But I've told you I have not been doing anything to intrude on him.
I do not understand you refusal to accept this", she stated.
"Let's just say I'm making sure of it and drop if for the night, all right?"
Rukia sighed, "Alright." She frowned softly as another question popped into
her mind, "Why did you hit me?"
Tatsuki blinked, "Humm?"
"Earlier tonight. Before you took me here. Why did you hit me?"
"You haven't figured it out yet?"
Rukia shook her head in the negative. Causing Tatsuki to pinch the bridge of
her nose in frustration, "Because of what you said."
"You mean about Ichigo?"
"Duh. Why else would I hit you?"
Rukia sighed softly, "Perhaps my words were not as... tactful as they could've
"No shit Sherlock."
"I do stand by what I said though", Rukia remarked. "It has trying to get him
to do this job".
"Even so, you didn't have to say it like that."
Rukia nodded, "I apologize."
"Besides, Ichigo's probably giving you a hard time 'cause you forced it on him.
Not 'cause he doesn't want to help you."
She gave Tatsuki an odd look, "He could have fooled me at times".
She laughed, "Yeah, I can imagine. He can be a jerk sometimes, but his heart's
in the right place."
Rukia sighed, "I just wish he understood that it's important and not give me
such a hard time about it. I practically had to drag him to show him why it
"What else can you tell me about this shinigami stuff?" Tatsuki asked.
Rukia blinked, "Why do you want to know?"
Tatsuki shrugged, "Hell, if my boyfriend's gotta do you job for ya, I might as
well know more about it."
Rukia hummed, "I don't know how much I can say..."
Before Tatsuki could respond, someone knocked on her door, "Who is it?"
"Oh daughters, It's daddy! I've something to give Ruru-chan before bedtime!"
Rukia's eyebrow twitched slightly at the nickname.
Tatsuki snickered a it before responding, "Come in, dad."
The door opened and Shuya stepped into his daughter's room, giving a goofy grin
at Rukia. "Ruru-chan."
Rukia forced a smile as Tatsuki restrained her laughter, "Y-yes, Arisawa-san?"
"Eh", Rukia peeped.
Shuya's eyes watered slightly, "I thought I told you to call me daddy,
Rukia's wide eyes twitched, "Dah-dad-ee", she said as best she could.
Tatsuki was close to turning blue as she tried to contain her laughter.
Shuya's manly tears flowed freely from his eyes once more as he embraced
Rukia weased as Shuya's loving embrace threatened her life once more, "can't...
breath...," she whispered.
Tatsuki couldn't contain it anymore. She laughed long and loud at the display.
Shuya nodded at his daughter's laughter, "Yes, yes daughter. This is a joyous
occasion! Let you joy sing throughout your new home!"
"To-Tomo-chan!", Shuya shrieked, surprised.
Tomoyo smiled serenely at her husband, "As happy as this occasion is, it'll turn
into a tragedy if you don't let her go."
Shuya blinked and looked to find Rukia unconscious in his arms, "...Ruru-chan!
Ruru-chan speak to daddy!!"
Tomoyo put a comforting hand on Shuya's shoulder, "I think it's best if we let
her sleep for the night, honey."
Shuya sniffled a bit, as he pulled out Rukia's gift from his shirt. It was a
pair of Tatsuki's pajamas she had long outgrown, but would fit Rukia's small
frame. They were rather plain save for the back. Where it had rhinestones that
spelled RURU-CHAN in English. "But.. but what bout her present, Tomo-chan?"
"She can receive it in the morning. Unlesss you want to dress her up in it, dear?"
Shuya looked aghast at the thought, "And take my Ruru-chan's purity?! Never!!"
"I'll do it!!" Tatsuki cried out.
Shuya blinked at his eldest daughter, "You, Tat-chan?"
Tatsuki nodded, "It would be my pleasure." she smirked.
Shuya gave her a thumb's-up, "That's my baby girl! We'll leave you two alone.
C'mon hon." He motioned to Tomoyo, who nodded as he left the room. Tomoyo
kissed her daughter's forehead, "Goodnight, Tatsuki-chan."
"Night mama," she responded as Tomoyo walked to the door. She gave Rukia a
rather odd look before she closed the door behind her. Tatsuki looked at the
comatose form of Rukia and smirked.
"Pleasant dreams, chibi-gami."
Night left. Mourning came. Same as it always did and always would. Rukia
awoke, yawning and scratching her stomach. Same as she always did. She
looked to her side and frowned slightly, finding Tatsuki snoring softly.
Her mind recalled yesterdays previous events, wondering how the girl could
act in such an impulsive manner. Letting jealousy cloud her better judgment.
"This world is very strange." she muttered to herself.
She stretched slightly, getting the kinks out of her body from the long sleep.
As she finished, her eyes caught sight of her clothes atop of Tatsuki's dresser.
'Hmm? My clothes?' she thought to herself as she finally looked down at her
She urked in surprise as she noticed her garments had changed from what she was
wearing the night before. Also...she could feel the air on the back of her neck,
but that shouldn't be with her hair in the way. She reached up and to her
astonishment felt her neck. 'What the hell is going on', she questioned mentally.
Her frown deepened as she got out of the bed, careful not to disturb Tatsuki
from her slumber. 'Did she do this?' She thought to herself, 'But why? If
this is vengeance, it's too petty. It doesn't make sense.'
Her eyes glanced to a mirror in the girls room and she stopped. Taking a good
look at herself. She was wearing a nightie that could have easily doubled as a
sundress. It was white with pink flowers upon it. Her hair, however, was
rather jarring. It was done up in Chinese hair braids on both sides of her head.
Easily explaining the wind she felt on her neck.
'This will NOT do,' she thought as she stormed back to Tatsuki's bed. She glared
at the sleeping martial artist. "Wake up."
"Hn?", was all she got out of the bed's occupant who promptly rolled over and
curled up further into the blanket.
Rukia's frown deepened as she began to attempt to shake the girl awake.
"Ichigo..." she mummer-ed deliriously, "But... but I'm not sure I'm ready
Rukia blushed slightly at that, "Get up! Now!"
Tatsuki groaned as she awoken, "Blug... what time is it?"
Rukia pointed at her head, "Time for you to explain this! What's the big
idea? Some petty jealousy?"
Tatsuki opened her eyes took one look at Rukia before she shrugged, "Oh...
momma got to you. Whoop-de-freaking-do." She yawned, "Wake me when
breakfast is ready."
Rukia blinked and played what she said in her head again. "Can you say
that again? What do you mean by, 'momma got to you'?
Tatsuki snored in response, already out of it.
Rukia's eyes narrowed at the girl, "Fine. If you want to be like that..."
She left the girl's room, frowning as she closed the door. Perhaps going
to the source would prove fruitful in this one instance.
"Ah, Ruru-chan! Good Mourning!"
Rukia blinked, turning the the cheerful voice, "Good mourning, Arisawa-san."
Shuya pouted, causing Rukia to sigh dejectedly. "Good mourning, daddy," she
said in a monotone voice.
Shuya nodded and hugged himself, "Much better my adorable baby girl!"
Rukia laughed uncomfortably at that, "Yes well... 'daddy'," she ignored the
pleasant shudder that Shuya had, "Can you explain this?" she asked. Pointing
to her head and pajamas respectively.
Shuya blinked before he nodded to himself, "Ah... you like my pajamas?"
"You.... made these?"
The Arisawa patriarch nodded, "I admit it's not up to my usual standards, but
I don't think I did that bad of a job considering how short notice your arrival
Rukia stared at the man, her mind in slight shock at how tacky he was.
"Indeed, I am amazing. A gorgeous body and a fantastic seamstress. Or is is
streamster? Well, no matter," He placed a gentle shoulder on Rukia's shoulder,
"It's the least daddy could do for his precious baby daughter!"
"Y....yes...." Rukia muttered, struggling not to criticize her host, "Still....
daddy... that doesn't explain my hair."
Shuya blinked, "Oh, that. It looks like mommy has taken to you as well."
Rukia blinked. "Mo-mommy?", she questioned woodenly.
Shuya grinned, "Yes... My Tomo-chan does have a habit of trying to make things
she deems cute and making them cuter.. It's her way of saying she accepts you
as her own!"
Rukia's eye twitched and her head twisted to look at her roommate.
Tatsuki continued to snore, oblivious to the goings on in her room.
"Hehehe... she tries her best with Tat-chan, but it's become an uphill struggle
ever since....The Crybaby has been attempting his thievery" He growled out that
Rukia blinked and turned back to Shuya, "The Crybaby?" she asked.
Shuya nodded, "That filthy, weakling, thieving crybaby boy who has been trying
to steal my precious Tat-chan from me... and my Tomo-chan as well! As if to
rub salt into my wounds!!" He turned To Rukia, grasping her shoulders as he
looked close to tears, "You won't let that crybaby steal you away from daddy
to, will you?"
"Are you..", she paused at his watery eyes, shell-shocked at everything that
was happening, "...talking about Ichigo", she managed to finish.
Shuya blinked, "You... you have met the crybaby? He hasn't entrapped you in
his deceitful web of seduction has he?!?"
'Se-seduction?!', she thought, her face twisting at the thought.
Shuya nodded, "Yes... though a weakling and a crybaby, he is full of pheromones
that seem to trip women up to fall for his weaklingness!" He grasped her
shoulders, "You haven't fallen for his wild seduction pheromones have you?!?"
"N-no", she weakly replied.
His eyes then shone with determination, taking Rukia once more by surprise, "Good,
Ruru-chan! You must be strong! I'll need your help to free your mommy and sister
from the crybaby's grasp!" He grasped her shoulders, "Come with me!"
"We're going to the gym!" He cried, pointing bravely down the hall, "We must make
you as strong as daddy in order for you to help daddy defeat the crybaby!"
He nodded, "YES! It's the perfect plan! We'll bond in our shared building of
strength and plotting the end of the Crybaby menace!" He scooped Rukia in one
arm, clenching his fist, "Just trust Daddy, Ruru-chan! And LET'S GOOOOOOO!"
Before Rukia could reply Shuya crashed into the floor. Looking to the side, she
saw Tatsuki sitting up in bed, her arm outstretched, "Dammit, ol' man... If you
gotta trash my boyfriend can you do it quieter? I'm tryin' ta sleep." Tatsuki
grumbled. Scratching her head irritably.
Shuya groaned as Rukia wiggled free from his grasp.
"Dammit," Tatsuki groaned, "Now I'm awake." Sh yawned as she shucked the covers
off her frame, scratching her back, "Guess I'll make breakfast."
Rukia eyed Tatsuki oddly as she walked pass her father, who was still down from
her attack. She then looked down at the unconscious Arisawa patriarch and back
to where Tatsuki had been.
'...How in the world did she come from... him?' she wondered.
No answer would be forthcoming anytime soon.
The next day...
"Gotta admit, I'm surprised to see you're still in one piece chibi-gami."
Rukia frowned, shoving her hands into her pockets as the gathered trio of Ichigo,
Tatsuki, and herself marched to school. He rose an eyebrow towards his girlfriend,
"I'm even more surprised that you girls actually managed to room together for one whole
day without you tryin' to kill her, babe. I mean, what happened to all that rage-ahol
you had goin' on for the past few weeks?"
Tatsuki smirked, "Seeing the shrimp over here deal with her new 'daddy' is almost enough
to make up for it."
Ichigo blinked and looked at Rukia with a raised eyebrow. Rukia in turn leveled a hard
stare at Ichigo, "Don't.... just.... don't."
Ichigo shrugged as he put two and two together, "Ah, Ol' man Arisawa-san... guess he liked
"You have no idea...." Rukia muttered, "How do you deal with him on a regular basis?
I'm worn out and It's been one day."
The substitute shinigami simply shrugged again in response, "You get used to him after having
him in most of your life."
"So you're saying I'm going to end up like you?", Rukia mentioned, deadpan.
"At this rate it'll be an improvement." Ichigo responded equally deadpan.
Tatsuki snickered at them, causing both of them to look at her.
"Something funny babe?" Ichigo asked.
"Just the thought", she chortled again, "of miss prissy-pants here turning out like you".
Rukia's eyebrow twitched, "Well... I certainly wouldn't want to be known as a womanizer."
The mention of what had happened on Saturday caused Ichigo to pale. He clutched his head and
groaned, "Oh man... I almost forgot what that horny mod did in my body! And that everyone thinks it me!!"
Tatsuki nodded in understanding, "That's true... you should be a bloody spec for kissing
Orihime in front of me, y'know."
Ichigo groaned. "Don't remind me", he said, palming his face and rubbing his temple with
Rukia sighed, "Don't worry about it."
Ichigo looked up at Rukia, frowning slightly, "....Why?" he asked warily.
"It's... been taken care of most likely."
Ichigo's frown deepened into his trademark scowl, "How do you know that?"
Tatsuki rose an eyebrow at the turn the conversation was going, but remained silent.
"I thought we agreed on no more of 'those'."
"Ichigo...what are you two talking about?"
Ichigo blanched, quickly reminded that a person on the reviving end of many of those memory
wipes was within earshot.
She crossed her arms over her breasts as she looked upon the duo. Her face developing her
own sight frown, "Does this have to do with peoples memories?"
He sighed, 'Might as well get the ass whooping over with now', "Yes. Yes it does."
Rukia sighed, "I know what you said Ichigo, but let me ask you this. Do YOU want your
classmates to remember what that Mod Soul did in your body? Or how Tatsuki reacted?"
Ichigo groaned as he developed a headache just remembering the mess that had gone down,
"No, but dammit..."
"Just chalk it up to a necessary evil. Besides, if you do your job right it won't be an
issue again, will it?"
The substitute shinigami just glared slightly at his 'supervisor', "Don't mean I gotta like
"Sometimes we have to do things we don't like for the greater good Ichigo. At the very
least your reputation will be salvaged."
Ichigo was about to retort when Tatsuki made her presence known once more by grabbing Ichigo
into a headlock. The boy let off a a startled cry as his girlfriend began tightening her grip
around his neck, "Y'know Ichigo... that reminds me. I haven't exactly gotten to your punishment
for lying all this time to me."
"Yeah about that..." the boy began, "I think I could apologize better if ya let me breath."
She noggied him in response.
"Ow,ow,ow." Ichigo responded as Tatsuki really got into the noggie.
"You're not getting outta this one that easy babe," Tatsuki began. "You messed up big time
and you know that you gotta pay for it."
"Sorry! Ow. Sorry! Ow. How can I make it up to ya?! Ow."
Ichigo was surprised when Tatsuki released her hold on him. He turned to look back at her,
finding her giving him an appraising look. "You wanna know?"
Her boyfriend nodded, "Yes. Without the noggies." Girl could noggie coal into diamonds.
"It's much more simple than you think. Of course," She smirked as he paused. Ichigo hated
that smirk that was on her face. Nothing good ever came out of Tatsuki having that look on
her face, "You could refuse, but if you do that I can guarantee you that you'll be speaking
like Orihime's big sister for a month."
Ichigo blanched and covered his manly zone protectively, "GAH!! You don't have'ta go there
woman!! I'll do it! What ever you want, I'll do it!!"
Tatsuki smiled, "Good boy. Like I said, it's simple really. Just don't coddle me like that
ever again. Tell me when you going out to fight a Hollow, ok? You think you can do that, babe?"
Ichigo nodded, "Done deal. So do you forgive me?"
Tatsuki nodded and kissed his cheek, causing the substitute shinigami's cheeks to redden
slightly, "Yes you are forgiven Kurosaki Ichigo."
He sighed in relief, "Thank you."
"But you're still in the doghouse."
She smirked as she took Ichigo's hand in hers and dragged him off to class, "Don't worry, you
got plenty of time to make it up to me."
Ichigo sighed dramatically, "Yes dear."
"That's the spirit."
Rukia was silent throughout the exchange, but was a bit surprised at how quick the girl was to
forgive her lover over these events. Then again, she supposed it might have been natural for
the girl to forgive and forget as quickly as she did. She did frown as she felt a familiar sense
of foreboding at the girl's ultimatum. As if involving this girl in these matters would lead to
the start of an even bigger mess than before.
"I can't wait to get back to Soul Society where things make sense," she muttered to herself.
Following the couple to school.
And so began the start of another ordinary day in Katakura Town.
End Ch. 5