Tagline: Haruhi was the statistical improbability that he was lucky enough to find, the unwelcome distraction that he didn't want to lose. (Kyouya/Haruhi)
Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran.
Lost and Found
Kyouya had finally run out of excuses. His brilliant mind could no longer create elaborate schemes of logic to explain away his behavior. It could not provide a reason for why he bothered to distract Tamaki when she sent a pleading look his way, or why he manipulated the others just so he could sit next to her. Despite how hard he tried to convince himself that his interest was completely based on the merits of money and, occasionally, amusement, there was just no way around the fact that Kyouya had the powerful urge to spend every waking moment with Haruhi. No, it seemed he could not write off his feelings for her as platonic anymore. It was over, and he knew it.
It was over the moment she had dared to do the one thing that no one else would ever dream of attempting. She had stood up to his father, without a second thought. The powerful patriarch of the Ootori family, known for his cold attitude and ruthless business tactics, could easily have ruined her future right then and there. He could have snapped his fingers and made sure that she was never admitted to law school or given a position in a firm. With one phone call, Ootori Yoshio could have even ordered his Private Police to "relocate" Fujioka Ryoji and his meddlesome, outspoken, impertinent daughter to Siberia. Kyouya was sure that Haruhi had to have known all this, but it hadn't stopped her from defending him from his father. She never even hesitated.
Although Kyouya hadn't needed to be rescued, especially when he had already bought out his father's company from under him, Haruhi's words had still touched him with their honesty and indignation, which had shown how much she cared for him as a friend. And for the first time since the Blonde Idiot had woken him from his state of quiet dissatisfaction, Kyouya had seen himself clearly and understood what he was feeling.
Haruhi was more than an intriguing commoner and slave to debt. She was more than a fellow host and companion. Somewhere in the chaos of the Host Club and all its antics, she had become more than just a friend to him. Kyouya had come to care for her. He wasn't sure how or when it had happened, how he had become so weak, so confused, so lost in her brown eyes. But whenever she looked at him, he only felt himself fall further and further.
And now she was capturing him all over again.
"Kyouya-sempai," Haruhi said, as she leaned over the back of his chair, "I think you made a mistake."
Kyouya felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up. Her gentle voice came from somewhere close to his ear, and he could feel her breath on his shoulder. He swallowed before speaking.
"Excuse me?" he drawled. He chanced a slight turn of his head and found her face inches from his. She was peering at his laptop screen, which had some bookkeeping spreadsheet on it. Kyouya couldn't say for sure what it was exactly because he'd only been pretending to work on it while he watched Haruhi clean up the Third Music Room after the rest of the Host Club had already gone home.
"Right there," she pointed at a column, "it should have an exponent of (n-1), not (n+1)."
Kyouya stared at the financial equation for a second and realized that she was right.
"Ah, yes," he recovered quickly, "thank you, Haruhi, I was just about to correct the typo when you interrupted me." He pushed his glasses up his nose, hoping it would conceal his shock and unease at having made such a simple mistake.
But he might as well have held up a sign that read "I FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE." This was Haruhi, after all, the most perceptive person he'd ever known. He hated that.
She walked around his chair to look at him. She had a slightly bewildered expression. Kyouya forced his face to remain impassive.
"Sempai, are you alright? I hope you're not getting sick." Her voice sounded concerned.
Kyouya smiled a little. Haruhi was blunt, but she was also very caring.
"I'm fine. Why? Is it so strange that I should make the occasional typo?" he quipped.
Haruhi blinked. "Well, yes. It is you, after all, Kyouya-sempai." she replied candidly.
Kyouya merely smirked.
"You don't make mistakes," she continued. "Perhaps you've been staring at the screen too long. Why don't you take a break? You must be tired."
"I'm fine," he said again, but in an assuring way rather than in annoyance. However, he took her advice and shut his Pineapple laptop with a snap. Haruhi grinned and proceeded to clear his table. Kyouya stood, picking up a couple of the teacups and saucers himself.
"Oh, thanks," she said in slight surprise.
"It's nothing," he said courteously.
They finished the last two tables quickly. As they packed up their things, Kyouya spoke again. "You're wrong, you know."
"Eh?" She looked at him. "About what?"
"About me not making any mistakes."
"Oh, really?" She looked amused.
"Indeed. You were there when my father pointed out several of my inadequacies, I believe."
Haruhi's expression immediately turned hard. "He was the one who was wrong, not you."
Kyouya gave a small smile. He appreciated her feeling righteous anger on his behalf. "But in this case, you are wrong. I, of course, make mistakes. I am human."
Haruhi returned to her pleasant demeanor. "Kyouya-sempai, you act so perfect that I sometimes suspect you're actually an android." she joked, zipping up her book bag.
He shrugged. "True, my focus and determination in completing tasks may seem robotic, but my motivation for working makes me human. I not only work toward my goals, but also for my desires."
Haruhi's brow furrowed. "What do you mean?"
Kyouya fastened the clasps of his brief case and straightened, adjusting his glasses. "It's simple. Goals come from logic, while desires are based on emotions. A machine may have the power of thought, but a human also has the ability to feel. After all, isn't that what being human is all about? We all feel the basic needs for food and shelter; we all have fears and doubts, hopes and dreams. Only a human being could have both goals and desires, because only we possess both a brain and a heart. And thus, we alone are qualified to decide the outcome of the constant battle between our hearts and our minds."
Haruhi processed his words for a moment. "Hmm, I guess that makes sense." Then her face broke into a smile, and she said, "But you know, Sempai, as logical as that argument may be, you have yet to actually prove that you are human. We all know your goal is to become the successor of the Ootori Group, but so far, you haven't shown any desires from your heart. Are you really human?"
Kyouya smirked. "Well said, Haruhi. But did I not just say that all humans share basic needs? I fit that criterion, don't I?"
"Actually, from all the time I've known you, I've never observed you to have the need for sustenance or rest, so that does not support your claim."
Kyouya noticed that her eyes seemed brightened by their stimulating conversation, and he found he was enjoying their exchange of teasing remarks, as well.
"My question remains. Are you in fact human, Kyouya-sempai?"
"How shall I prove it to you then, Haruhi?"
"Tell me, what do you desire?" she asked with a trace of a giggle.
Kyouya blinked in surprise. "I-" he began, then stopped and just said, "Huh." He bowed his head a little, and only a vague smile and the glare of his glasses could be seen.
"Ah, y-you don't have to answer the question," Haruhi said quickly. "It's okay if you don't want to tell me." She took a couple of steps closer, chuckling nervously.
The truth was, Kyouya knew his answer, and he did want to tell her. But once again, his logical mind was telling his foolish feelings that there was absolutely no merit in confessing to Haruhi and humiliating himself.
He was just about to declare his brain the winner and come up with a feasible lie when Haruhi spoke.
"I already know you're human, Kyouya-sempai." He looked up to see her gentle smile. "There have been many times when I've seen you forego the most logical course of action in favor of one that would benefit the whole Club, not just yourself. You often ignore your own misgivings just to please Tamaki and the others. And don't try to say it was just easier to do what they wanted in order to shut them up or something. You really are a nice guy."
Normally, Kyouya would have tried to deny all of this. He would've demanded a list of every instance in which she thought he was acting in an altruistic manner, and then he would have gone on to find some sort of selfish reason for doing all of them. But something in the way she looked at him and spoke about him… could it possibly be admiration? Whatever it was, it rendered him unable to defend his precious reputation, and all he could do was stare at her as she took another step closer.
She frowned at him. "But I still don't know what you work towards, what merits you seek." Another step. "And not Ootori the machine, but you, Kyouya, the human." Her large brown eyes searched his face for answers, and that's when his mind finally lost the battle.
"What I desire…"
Kyouya closed the small distance between them. Haruhi continued to look puzzled, just like she had at the beach house. But this time, when he leaned his face close to hers, she did not seem so innocently oblivious. Her eyes betrayed apprehension, and Kyouya wondered if she was afraid of him.
He straightened, moving away from her, but stopped when Haruhi suddenly said, "Yes?" She looked expectant, as if she was encouraging him to finish his confession.
Kyouya paused, and then spoke quietly. "What I want is…"
His gray eyes softened as they swept over her face, studying the shape of her eyes, down her cute nose, and lingering at her lips. A faint blush appeared on her pale complexion. Unconsciously, Kyouya raised his hand and placed his cold fingertips on her warm cheek. Haruhi flinched a little, but she didn't turn away. She remained still, her doe eyes gazing steadily up at him.
"I want," he whispered, as he bent his head to hers, "to do this." And he gently pressed his lips to hers.
Haruhi immediately became rigid, and her eyes, ridiculously wide. Kyouya chuckled softly as he placed his other hand on her shoulder comfortingly. When he felt the muscles begin to relax, he slowly kissed her again. A small sigh escaped her parted lips. When he continued to kiss her tenderly, she tentatively returned the pressure and then reached out to grasp the front of his blazer. Kyouya slid his hand to her back and drew her closer, and Haruhi allowed herself to lean into his body.
Their kisses deepened. She moaned slightly against his mouth, and he laughed soundlessly into hers. Seemingly of their own accord, Haruhi's hands moved up his chest and around his neck, her fingers weaving into his silky, raven-black hair. When breathing became difficult, Kyouya reluctantly loosened his hold on her waist, and they broke apart.
It was blissful relief, to finally fulfill a long-time wish, and Kyouya had dreamt of that often. He rested his forehead against hers, letting out slow, steadying breaths. Haruhi, on the other hand, seemed incapable of proper respiration. She was still gasping erratically, and her flushed face still showed some degree of alarm.
Kyouya cupped her warm face. "Haruhi."
She snapped out of her trance. "Kyouya-sempai?" she responded, a little too loudly.
He smirked at her flustering, while his hand caressed her cheek. "Are you alright?"
Haruhi needed a second to decide if she was or not, but then she said, "Yes," with a small, embarrassed smile. "I think so."
He grinned back at her, placing his hands on her waist again. "So, are you convinced now?"
"What?" she asked in confusion.
"Now do you believe that I am human?"
Haruhi laughed. "Mm, I'm still not sure. I think I may need more convincing."
"That can be arranged," he said with a sly smile.
But then a sudden concern came to him. A quick calculation told him that he had to explain to her that his desire was not simply lust, or else he would never get what he truly sought.
"Haruhi, I-" he began, but stumbled and lost his voice.
Haruhi smiled kindly at him. "I know," she said, "you like me."
Kyouya was startled a bit by the frankness of her statement, but he was mostly thankful that her amazing perceptive skills had actually been applied to a romantic situation, an area that she usually failed at quite miserably.
"Hmm." He pushed his glasses up. "Something like that."
Haruhi chuckled. Then she put her hand on his face and looked at him with affection. "So this is the real Kyouya," she said. "I'm glad I found you."
And Kyouya knew he was lost forever.
A/N: I'm not that happy with how this turned out. I think I might've tried to use too many parallels in this one fic. :P I mean, I like it when writers have recurring themes, but I had "lost/found", "robot/human", and "heart/mind" in here. I'm sorry if it was confusing or repetitive. D: Please review!