I'm a bit nervous about this...cuz i had no idea how to make Joanne react, but since i had requests for me to write a part two, i gave it a try!

So here you have it...Joanne's reaction.


Part two: How Manny? - Joanne's reaction

"Where do you think you're going?" Joanne asked, her jaw clenched, her arms folded.

Maureen froze in her spot, one leg halfway out the window, her eyes glued to the city outside, wishing she could be out there, instead of inside with her angry girlfriend. "Ummm…"

Joanne slowly walked over to the window and pushed the diva away. She slammed the window shut, and slowly turned around, her eyes burning into Maureen, "Perhaps going out to look for sex partner number twenty-eight?"


"Are disgusting!" Joanne yelled, "You are a filthy, sick, nympho!"

Maureen scrunched up her face. "Nympho? If you're going to call me names, at least use real ones."

"That is a real one Maureen! And I think you need to go see a therapist!" Joanne said, "Who in their right mind has sex with so many different people?"

"Apparently nympho's." Maureen informed her. She then put on her pout, and began to approach Joanne, "Come on Pookie, you asked me the question. If you never asked we wouldn't be having this fight right now would we?" she asked, pursing her lips a little more, reaching out for her lover.

"Don't touch me!" Joanne said and stepped back. "I don't know where you've been."

"I've been with you." Maureen said.

"You're twenty-nine years old." Joanne said. "And you had sex with twenty-seven different people…did you start having sex at the age of two!? One person for each year!?"

"No, more like grade nine…" Maureen said, "You can't get mad…you're number twenty-seven. You are my last one too! My number will not get any bigger." Maureen assured her with a bright smile, "You cured me baby…"

"No Maureen I didn't…you want sex twenty-four hours a day. That is a problem!" Joanne said.

Maureen huffed and crossed her arms, "So I have a high sex drive, it doesn't mean I have a problem." She lowered herself to the bed, "You can wipe that disgusted look off your face too…you're making me feel ashamed."

"You should be." Joanne spat with a bitter laugh, "Twenty-seven people! Twenty fucking seven people!"

"I'm going to make it thirty, if you don't stop yelling!"

"Have you ever heard of STD's?" Joanne asked.

"Have you ever heard of condoms?" Maureen fired back.

Joanne crossed her arms, her eyebrows arched with furry, "So out of all those twenty-seven people, you're telling me you never contracted anything?"

"Yeah I did!" Maureen shouted jumping off the bed, heading for the bathroom, "I caught the Joanne Jefferson herpy." Joanne's face fell, and Maureen nodded, "Yeah that's right! You bitch and moan, it makes me burn inside! And sometimes I just want to scratch your eyes out when you roll them at me! Symptoms: makes me burn, makes me want to scratch, and sticks around forever!"

"At least I'm not a slut!" Joanne said

"Whatever!" Maureen said, storming into the bathroom, slamming the door shut.

"Seriously…" Joanne began, knocking on the bathroom door, "You need to see a therapist."

"I'm not going to see some stupid therapist!" Maureen yelled, "I don't have a problem, I'm just horny!"


"No!" Maureen said, "What will you do, be mad at me!? Ooo…I'm scared!"

Joanne thought about a punishment, and soon a smirk hit her face, "If you don't I won't have sex with you."


"Maureen?" Joanne called out.

"I can cope without you." Maureen said. "There are other ways of pleasuring myself."

"For how long?" Joanne asked with a knowing smile.


Joanne continued on, "No more dirty kinky positions, no more acting out your fantasies with handcuffs, no more-"

"Okay!" Maureen said opening the door, "I'll go talk to someone!"

"Thank you." Joanne said, "Now go take a shower…and wash your va-jay-jay extra good… I don't want to touch that thing until I know it's clean."

"You're a bitch." Maureen mumbled,

"At least I'm not a slut." Joanne said, and turned to walk away,

"Okay you can stop calling me that!" Maureen said the hurt evident in her voice, "I get it, I slept with a lot of people."

Joanne turned back around, catching the tears stinging Maureen's eyes. "Honeybear… don't cry."

"Too late!" Maureen said with fret, tears freely flowing from her eyes. "I know people talk about me behind my back, and I know I'm a bitch sometimes, and yes I am a slut, but when you hear it from someone you love and the person who is supposed to love you back…it actually hurts…"

"I'm sorry." Joanne said, wrapping her in a hug. "I'm just upset."

"Why?" Maureen asked, "It's not like I cheated on you. You are twenty-seven. Mark was twenty."

"Poor Mark." Joanne mumbled, stroking the diva's hair while she sobbed.

"You're disgusted by me aren't you?" Maureen cried nuzzling her face in Joanne's neck.

"No…no…" Joanne sighed, "I'm just shocked…"

"Well let it go." Maureen sniffled. "That's the past, and I've grown up a little since then, I'm with you now, okay?"

"You're number isn't going to get any bigger?" Joanne asked,

"No…" Maureen said with a smirk, "You're the best sex I ever had. You're very adventurous when it comes to sex…I love it."

"Thank you." Joanne smiled, wiping a tear from Maureen's cheeks. "Go take a shower, I'll make us some breakfast."

Maureen nodded, and skipped to the shower, while Joanne left the bathroom with a grin on her face. "Best sex out of twenty-seven people…I must be amazing!"

Two day's later Maureen went to life support. She refused to go see a therapist, so as a way to humor Joanne, she went to life support.

"Everyone welcome Maureen." Paul said, and everyone greeted the diva. "So Maureen tell us what's troubling you."

Maureen stood up, brushing a few stray curls from her face, "Hi everyone…I'm Maureen Johnson and I'm a sex addict."

Two weeks later:

"Joanne…" Maureen whined, crawling across the couch, lying in between the lawyer's legs. "I'm horny." She bluntly stated.

"Maureen!?" Joanne asked shocked. "Hasn't life support taught you anything?"

"Yeah…how much of a waste of time it is. I spend an hour there, when I could be spending that hour in bed naked, with you!"

"You need help." Joanne stated shaking her head.

"I need you…" Maureen whispered, "Inside of me ASAP…"

"As long as you promise me one thing." Joanne said, her fingers wrapping under the drama queen's chin. "Your number stays twenty-seven, and when people ask, you say you've only been with seven people, me being the seventh one."

"Okay, okay." Maureen said, "Can we do it now?"

"Get your ass into the bedroom!" Joanne ordered.

"Pookie!" Maureen squealed with delight. "I love when you're demanding." She then raced to the bedroom door, leaning up against the frame seductively, "I may have slept with twenty-seven people, but you will always be number one on my list!"

The end!



Thanks for reading and reviewing! I'm happy you all liked it so much, you wanted a part two! ;D