Nervousness

I should probably be nervous.

That was what I was thinking about, sitting carefully on a wooden chair and fingering the fine satin between my fingers. Today was my wedding day, and I was not even a little nervous. I felt kind of tired, bored even, and it frightened me to no end.

Why the hell wasn't I so scared I couldn't even sit still without falling over? That was exactly how I usually was, even when I was just nervous about a test or something trivial like that. This was a huge deal and I hadn't even tripped over the edge of the carpet once.

My dress was perfect. I hadn't even been with Alice when she got it for me, but something told me it wasn't exactly retail. Maybe it was the way, when I asked how much it had cost, Alice had just kept smiling and said, "Pretty cheap, actually." But I saw it. The way she smiled for way too long and the smile itself was way too wide.

Oh God, Queen Elizabeth had probably gotten married in this very dress.

My thoughts were interrupted by the door opening. I swung around in shock, but did it too quickly for my own ability and found myself surrounded by white silk on the floor.

I heard a high chuckle and muttered, "Alice." Of all the people I hoped would walk through that door, Alice was somewhere in the bottom five right now.

There was a swooshing sound, and suddenly I was on my feet with the dress gently swinging impeccably against my body. "No vampire tricks right now, Alice," I groaned, knowing that when she started, there was practically no stopping her.

She visibly deflated and frowned at me. "Why aren't you happy, Bella? It's your wedding day!"

"I am happy," I defended myself distractedly. I was trying to sit down on my chair again, but my dress skirt was so full that it pushed away the chair every time I tried to get my butt close to it.

"But you're not excited," Alice said, sounding as though she was trying to figure a puzzle out.

I looked up from my predicament with the chair. Giving up, I stood straight and folded my arms over my chest. "Yes, I am excited," I rolled my eyes. "As excited as I can be with all this attention on me. That's not the problem."

"There is a problem then," Alice said triumphantly. "Come on, Bella, talk to me. Maybe I can help you."

I appraised her silently. Alice was my best friend. She was annoying, pushy, bossy and short, but she genuinely cared for me and made me feel very good about myself. Part of my participation in this wedding thing was for her sake, she really wanted to give it to us.



"Okay." Here it goes, I thought, she'll think I'm insane. "I'm not nervous."

Alice stare went kind of blank. "What do you mean? Why does it matter if you're not nervous?"

I gaped at her. Was she the one who was insane? "It's my wedding, Alice! I'm getting married today, and I haven't even broken a sweat."

She was suddenly smiling at me, and she looked more like an angel than ever before. I couldn't help but feel some small kind of relief, but I still didn't see what there was to smile about.

"That's because you're marrying Edward, silly," she said, slapping my shoulder lightly.

Edward. As soon as she uttered his name, I felt warmth spread through me, calming me marginally.

"You have nothing to be nervous about, so you're not nervous," Alice said, then she mumbled playfully," That's probably the most sensible thing you've ever managed."

I stuck my tongue out at her half-heartedly, still trying to understand exactly what she was saying.

"Do you understand, Bella? You're so sure that you and Edward are going to be perfectly blissful together that you don't feel the need to be nervous," Alice said slowly, probably thinking that she had been talking at vampire speed before. She did that sometimes, excited as she always was.

"I actually think I do," I suddenly grinned at her. "I love Edward!"

Alice rolled her eyes and sighed. "What a revelation." Then she got a very familiar look in her eyes for a minute. She grinned.

"I should get out of here," she said, sounding like she was up to something. "You'll get a visitor soon."

I was confused again. "Who?" I had already talked to Renée, Charlie, Esme and Carlisle. Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie had given me and Alice a ride to the church. The only one left was –

"Edward, of course," Alice sang.

My heart skipped a beat and Alice let out a tinkling giggle when she heard it.

"Isn't that bad luck?" I hissed at her. I did not need any more bad luck than I already had managed to collect.

"Not if the maid of honor allows it," she winked at me.

Suddenly she had kissed my cheek, whispered "I love you" and danced out the door. I almost fell over in shock again. Then I heard a gentle knock.

"Bella?" said a very familiar voice through the door, and my knees immediately grew weak. "May I come in?"

"Yes," I called, cringing slightly at how weak my voice was.



And in he came, looking more amazingly beautiful than ever before. He was wearing a black suit with a white shirt and a simple black tie, and I was practically faint. I noticed that he was staring at me as well.

"Well?" I asked quietly.

He didn't answer me, and my heart started thumping more wildly. Did he not like the dress? Or did I look weird in it? Was this beautiful creature realizing that he didn't want boring old me after all?

Then I realized that I had a cold pair of lips pressed against mine, and my heart stopped beating instead. I was too shocked to even wound my hands in his hair, which made the kiss longer than ours tended to be. After a while, he pulled away, kissing me softly one last time. Then he opened his eyes to look at me.

We didn't say anything; we just stared into each other's eyes. I knew he could hear my heart skipping beats, and he knew I could see in his eyes that if his heart had been able to, it would be doing exactly the same.

Nervousness was suddenly no problem. I would be stumbling and tumbling down that aisle, probably making candles fall to the floor and maybe even knocking the minister out cold with an elbow. But I knew that whenever I would fall, Edward would catch me.

Still, not falling down during my own wedding would be awesome.

Author's Note: There it is, my inevitable first Twilight story. It's been a long time coming. I hope you like it and I will hint that I would love a review.