Edit: I'm updating and editing this story, due to too many errors, complaints, and all around not happiness. Geez, people, do you not look at the dates it was submitted?

Disclaimer: I do not own SaGa Frontier, dear as I may want to. It had a lot of potential, that's for certain. The game, that is.

Was it much of a surprise that Asellus, blood-child of Mystic Orlouge, and world's only half mystic in the universe, was bored out of her mind, whilst the two 'brothers' of the Kingdom of Magic bickered amongst themselves?

Of course, somehow one thing had led to another, and currently, Blue was attempting to smite the red half, whom was running like a chipmunk on Cheetos would, laughing like the little idiot some were led to believe he were…

Perhaps the whole, "It takes a moron to know one," thing hadn't been the smartest thing to say on Blue's part, but Rouge seriously took the cake for 'most annoying being EVER.' Especially after THAT comment…

Which made Asellus wonder; why in all the bloody regions was she trying to help these two imbeciles become stronger?

Granted, that Rouge wished to learn Mystic Magic (which would be stupid, considering he lacked the gift) proved interesting.


Anymore of this torment, and she'd probably bust a gut, or something…

Or, kick one of them in the family jewels, which would work out well, too.

And, for all the training she'd had (hell, if she could down Orlouge, she could nigh well be INVINCIBLE!) she could not stop from tumbling over in a heap when the dysfunctional pair crashed into her.

Asellus swore her eye twitched, just a tad…

"What's wrong with you two?" she asked exasperatedly, deadpanning upon noticing the two were still trying to maul, or at the very least, seriously injure each other.

Rouge shrugged nonchalantly, swatting at the other's hand.

"Iono. Maybe it's because we aren't learning anything useful here."

Ooh, wrong move, Blue thought, wincing, as the Princess suddenly snapped.

"WHAT THE FREAKING HELL DO YOU MEAN YOU AREN'T LEARNING ANYTHING USEFUL?! YOU LEARNED LIFESPRINKLER, DIDN'T YOU?!" The teal haired woman screeched, Rouge simply standing there in shock.

Blue quickly began running when his shouldn't-be-alive-still-fate-hates-me-for-being-related-to-him brother made the very snide (and stupid comment) of, "Well, don't go PMS-ing on me, Asu; I get enough headaches from Blue here."

Boy, was Rouge lucky Blue had grabbed his wrist, and run, because nothing was worse than a scorned woman.

… Or one with a migraine. Big dif.

I'm not certain whether an early wake-up call is for the better or worse, especially when it involves screaming, and nearly having an acute cardiac arrest.

Needless to say, Rouge is much more effective than an alarm clock any day of the week.

Wish he'd learn not to leave food on the dang ladder, though. He better not land on me again!

You'd think such a magnificently proficient magician would know to THROW THINGS OUT PROPERLY…

Perhaps I was the one who got the intellectual side.

But, I digress.

You know what the worst way to wake up in the morning is?

It's simple; Slipping on a banana peel, from a bunch of feet off the floor, nearly impaling yourself on the bed, and nearly twisting your ankle.

Oh, not to mention, almost decapitating your brother, intentional or not.

But, seriously…


As a Master Magician (or, the closest this world'll ever get, with how Rouge is going along) one would think I'd be able to easily escape my counterpart, and perhaps succeed in knocking said other out.

As such, I am regretfully not in such high… Hopes at the moment.

When Rouge gets angry… He gets MAD. And, when that happens, stand clear, because, with the speed an Abyss Bat would be jealous of, and strength to rival the Master Ring's, those spells he casts wildly can hurt. Badly. ESPECIALLY Megawindblast.

Given a day or two, he'll eventually calm down…

In the meantime, please let Riki be awake… And willing to hide me.

(The next day~!)

Miraculously enough, Rouge has managed to dodge the peel this time!

Albeit, his swearing at the banana was so loud it woke me up, but at least he isn't trying to maul me again.

"Holy ketchup on pizza, look at how moldy that thing is!" Rouge comments loudly, pointing an accusatory finger at said peel. I sigh.

Trust Rouge to come up with the weirdest sentences ever…

Then, as an afterthought…

"You DO know ketchup, or at least a variant of it, IS put onto most pizzas, right, Rouge?" I inquire, ruby eyes holding an almost stupid look, oddly reminding me of a cockatiel's eyes.

"Wha, really? I thought it was… You know." He replies, and I can't help feel somehow like the smartest being in the room…

"… What in the hell did you think it was?"

Because, really, WTF?!

Shadow: As much as I enjoy SaGa, it's difficult now for me to write this, considering I was literally a different person when I first wrote this.

Just don't ask.

It's toned down a lot, which is better?

Oh well, this edit is for all those dopes that didn't check the submit date.