Bella POV Hey! Ok, this is my first story so any criticism is appreciated. Just not anything too harsh. Pretty please? Let's keep it clean people. Yeah, so the majority of this thing is gonna be Bella POV, but I might throw in some Edward or Jacob or Someone(anyone I choose at the time) POV to spice things up. I have not decided yet, so yeah!

And also, Edward does come in, just not for a few chapters. So, patience grasshoppers.

AND ANOTHER ALSO! Jacob is abusive. This story is mostly rated M for that reason, and other things. So yeah. Sorry. This story's been in my head for forever and it will get better. Promisies!

Warning! If you like Jacob, don't read. Or if you like Jacob and read this anyway, don't bitch at me. I don't like him and I am The All Powerful Author! So there! …. ahem Onward with the story then! Enjoy!Flashback Bella POV


Bella POV

Start Flashback

I still can't believe Edward left me. I mean, sure, he gasp was so far out of my league, I was lucky for him to give me the time of day. Those were by far gasp the very best months of my life. But now it's over. And what do I have? Well, that's just it. I don't even know what I have. My dads worried about me, gasp my friends don't ever talk to me anymore, hell, I'm lucky I'm not failing all my classes, my days just pass in blurs.

Oh god, oh god, not again. Why do I keep doing this? Thinking gasp his name, when it does this to me every time. I just hope no one sees me like this. Pulled over, gasp clutching my heart, gasping for air. I can feel it, ripping away at me. Why did I delude my gasp self into believing he really loved me?

So that's why I'm here now, La Push. My dad finally ordered me to do something, and hanging out with Jessica sure didn't work. She probably hates me even more now. But, who can really blame her? Normal people don't approach total strangers on quiet streets. At least I didn't tell her EXACTLY what I heard. Huh, I don't remember any of that drive, weird. Oh well. I see Jacob now. When did he get so tall?

End Flashback

As I thought back to that day, the first day Jacob was my real friend, the first time I'd laughed in months, and yet the last day of my life in a way, my eyes burned. Suddenly, despite my efforts to reign in the tears of agony, I screamed and wept in pain and sadness of what had happened in the past year and a half.

A few weeks after Jacob and I became friends we were out in his garage he told me he loved me. That was the breaking point. I hadn't been trying to lead him on or anything, and I didn't love him. I loved Edward, he was the only man my heart had room for.

"Jake, I'm really sorry. I don't love you. I love…. Ed. Edward. I love Edward." I gasped and clutched my chest as saying his caused the hole in my heart to tear itself even farther apart. I looked up at Jake. He looked… wrong.

Me denial had been the breaking point. He sat there for a moment, his eyes slowly growing angrier and angrier, until he finally snapped. He jumped up and slapped me, hard, around the face. I sat there in shock. My best friend had just slapped. Because I didn't love him.

"What the fuck do you mean you don't love me?! Of course you do! Whether you like it or not, Edward isn't coming back!" He just yelled. He wasn't my Jacob now, he was a monster. The kind people run from.

"I cannot fucking believe you! You know you love me, you advanced on me my first you know!" He continued yelling. I didn't focus on what he was saying, I just felt the pain wash over me. Then, he slapped me again. Harder this time. I cried out in pain as I felt something warm slide down my cheek. 'How did he hit me that hard?' I thought. He was right in my face now.

"You know you can't escape this, right? You and I are inevitable. We BELONG together. Not like you and that filthy, disgusting bloodsucker. Charlie wants us to be together. You can't escape me. I love you, I know what you need better than you do."

And with that, he grabbed my chin with a bruising force, and kissed me. He squeezed my face even harder when I didn't respond. I whimpered, and tried to kiss back. When his hands started to roam though, I panicked. I tried to push him away, but he was so much stronger than I was and he held me there.

His hands went up my shirt, and he moaned. Without even thinking about the consequence, he ripped my shirt in half, throwing it outside in the mud. Now I was paralyzed with terror. I had realized what he was after, and I wasn't strong enough to fight him off.

My jeans and bra followed my shirt, all landing in a heap out on the rain soaked ground. I knew there was no use fighting, but I couldn't help myself. I tried to hut him, to make him get off me. But he just punched me in the stomach and growled in my ear.

"You know you want it, Bella. Stop fighting me. You know you love me more that that bastard who left."

"No!" I yelled. "I don't love you Jake! Please, don't do this!"

"Shut up, you lying bitch!"

He ripped off my underwear, positioning himself over me.

"And now, my love, I'll give what I KNOW you want"

I screamed, but he didn't stop. He thrust himself into me completely, as I cried out in pain. He ignored me and continued to rape me.

When he was done, he rolled off me and I ran to my truck. I was able to fight off the tears until I got home. After running past Charlie, giving him a story about tripping and hitting a rock to explain my bruised and bleeding face, I got to my room. I buried myself under the covers, shuddering, until I finally lost control, screaming and crying into my pillow so my father wouldn't hear me.

Oh, how I wished Edward had never left.


Kinda short, but I wrote this really fast. I wanted to get it up.

So, what do you think? Review please! This is my first story, so I'll take criticism.

Sorry if you don't like Jacob as the bad guy, but I think of him as one. He manipulates Bella in the books, and he's way dramatic. So yeah! Thanks for reading.