Title: Back To The Start
Characters/Pairings: House/Cameron (implied Cameron/Chase)
Word Count: 500-ish
Summary: You thought you would never do it; you would never cheat on someone you loved. But there he was on your doorstep with a three-word apology and melancholic look. And there you were again, forgiving him.
General S4 spoilers, but very vague.
Not beta'd; all mistakes are mine.
Title is taken from Coldplay's "The Scientist". If you like listening to music while reading, then I highly suggest that song; the lyrics are perfect. :-)
You never thought you would do it
You thought you would never do it; you would never cheat on someone you loved.
But there he was on your doorstep with a three-word apology and melancholic look.
And there you were again, forgiving him.
He asked you why you were dating the man.
You asked why he cared.
He looked at you then –
That single intense gaze that made you feel like he was inspecting you under a microscope, dissecting you and hoping for answers - you wish you were back four years ago when you had an excuse to look back.
But things had changed, and they always would, no matter how hard he tried to deny it.
He told you he wasn't there to apologise; you were hardly surprised, but something in his body language stopped you from opposing him.
You doubted you had ever seen him look so uncomfortable and awkward, yet there was a certain amount of excitement and anxiety about him that was almost endearing. If he had not come to apologise, then why was he there?
And then he kissed you.
Years and years spent hopelessly dreaming of that moment, and yet all you could think was "why now?".
He held you curiously and with fascination; fingers cautiously threaded in your blonde hair, nose gently against yours, hands...cupped your cheek, supported your back, lay in your hands...
...until you remembered.
You broke the kiss. Whispered you couldn't do this.
Yet neither of you moved; his hands on your waist and your forehead against his.
You looked at him.
He looked at you.
And just for a moment, the line between right and wrong and good and sin and past and future were blurred and forgotten.
All that mattered was now.
"You're still in love with me."
You shouldn't have been there with him, and you certainly shouldn't have kissed him.
But your lips tingled with excitement, and the taste of him lingered pleasantly in your mouth, and his warmth breath tickled your skin and made you shiver in anticipation, and the intense look in his eyes made your heart skip a beat.
Were you in love with him?
"Don't flatter yourself."
And this time, it was you who initiated the kiss.
You were cheating.
You were cheating on your long-term boyfriend with someone that had spent half his time insulting you.
But...it was him. And being in his arms felt right, almost natural. Kissing him made you feel...good. And in that single moment, you could close your eyes and imagine that you were back when things were simple.
But things change.
You stepped back.
His eyes hazily looked to yours in confusion; the raw vulnerability and love that lay in them made your heart ache with compassion.
You were about to break the unbreakable.
You couldn't, you told him.
He closed his eyes and shook his head, told you he understood – (he didn't).
You watched him leave, but you had to know: "why now?"
He turned back with a sigh.
"I realised what I'd lost", he whispered.
But he hadn't lost you; he had found you.
And somehow, you knew he always would.
Thanks for reading! Comments (as always) are welcome!