Prosaic

by Skye-Sama

Chapter Five

I must have been a criminal in my past life.

Maybe I was a thief who robbed millions from different banks, or a pedophile who loved collecting little children. Worse, I must have been a mass murderer, like Adolf Hitler.

Whatever I may have been in my past life, one thing was for sure. I was a terrible person who lived a sinful life. That must be it. I must have been a very gorgeous and charming lady who had multiple affairs with different men despite being married and have three cute children, each with different fathers. It made sense.

Why else would I be tortured this way? I am being punished. Seriously, having two arrogant men- one I wanted to run away from, the other I wanted to murder- raid my house, gobble on my food, and then crash the swimming activity I have with my friends was absolutely the worst.

Kami help me.

Gathering my courage, I removed the tube dress I was wearing over my bikini. I could feel a few heated stares directed at me and I had to smirk before diving into the pool and swimming to where Naruto, Sakura, Hinata and Sai were huddled together.

The two devils followed a few minutes later and my jaw almost dropped. I remember seeing Sasuke's body when I first met him but he even looked hotter now. Was that even possible?

And Gaara… was Gaara… and being Gaara meant making me want to push him into a wall and kiss him. But then again, I wouldn't mind trying it on Sasuke.

Oh god. Did I just think that?

"I need a drink," I mumbled to myself, taking a mental note to drown myself in booze later that night.

"We brought some with us," Sakura told me, and I blinked in surprise. I didn't realize I said it out loud.

I smiled. "Thanks. I'll have one."

She nodded. "It's in the pink cooler."

I got out of the pool and into our table. I didn't have to search for long. The moment I reached the table, the obnoxious color pink stood out and screamed for attention and I couldn't help but wince at its pinkness.

Flipping the cover open, I grabbed a can of beer.

o-o-o

An hour later, empty cans laid on the table plus a pink-faced Izumi who was smiling and laughing to everything that everyone said. Beside me, Gaara was silent, but the smirk on his face clearly said that he was enjoying the display in front of him.

Another hour later, not only dozens of empty cans were scattered all over the place, but my companions as well. Izumi had her head on the table, passed out from all the alcohol. Naruto was sprawled on the ground with Sakura on his chest. Hinata was barely awake, Sai was totally wasted and even Gaara- who was forced to drink because Izumi was literally shoving beer into his throat- was asleep like a cat in a corner.

That left me as the last man standing.

I sighed. These folks were no fun. Just when I was warming up, they've already passed out. I stood up and called for assistance. I couldn't possibly carry all of them into their respective rooms. Being the gentleman that I am, I took care of the women, while I left the men to the assistants or whatever you call them.

I had Sakura sent to her room first. The girl was entirely knocked out, and I had no difficulties carrying her to her room. Hinata was next. She refused to be carried and insisted to walk on her own, which proved to be quite a problem since she couldn't even take a step without tumbling over. When we finally reached Izumi's penthouse, I saw Gaara and Sai on the couch. I helped Hinata to what I thought was the guest room before going down once more for Izumi.

The last girl proved to be the most difficult of all. She was an angel while unconscious but when I laid her on the bed and she woke up, the trouble started. Without warning, her arms went around my neck causing me to almost fall over her. Jade eyes stared hazily at me.

"You smell nice," she said in a child-like voice, burying her nose in my shoulders. The sudden action had me clenching my fists on her sides.

Composing myself, I tried to be reasonable. "Let go, Izumi, you had too much to drink," I told her softly. I may be known to play around, but I never took advantage of drunk women. There was no need to.

She giggled but didn't let go. "Don't I get a goodbye kiss?"

I silently cursed. The girl was impossible. She was practically asking me to kiss her and yet she looked so innocent while doing so.

I sighed, leaning forward to give her a peck on the cheek.

She pouted. "You're no fun," she complained, and before I could even react, she reached up and kissed me.

With that, my suddenly went blank and all that I could ever think of was the way her lush lips moved against mine, the way her fingers tangled in my hair and the way she made a sound at the back of her throat when the kiss deepened and my tongue danced with hers.

During that moment, I knew I was damned.

Because despite the strong taste of beer lingering in her mouth, she was the sweetest, most addictive girl I had ever tasted.

Someone shoot me now.

o-o-o