Nate Winter

Everybody Loves Raymond

"Hey, Ray? I had an idea for tomorrow night since it is New Years Eve," Debra said as she sat down next to her husband. "The Parkers just invited the kids over to their house to spend the night, and I was thinking that maybe we could just spend a quiet night here, order in pizza, and watch movies until midnight."

"I don't know. You know how I hate staying up late on New Years Eve. I've got to get up early and watch 15 hours of college football New Years Day so I can write about it in my column. Also, I know why you want to order in pizza," complained Ray.

"Why do I want to order pizza," Debra asked.

"You love it when that cute pizza delivery guy comes to the door, and you tip him more than you pay for the pizza," Ray accused.

"Whatever Ray. Are you jealous of a pizza guy? Anyway, what do you say? It would be just the two of us for a quiet evening at home. I think it would be a great way to start the new year," Debra said.

Ray agreed, and the next evening Ray came back from dropping the kids off at the Parkers to a quiet house. Debra came downstairs and they sat on the couch together to watch a movie.

"I picked up a couple movies. Which one do you want to watch Ray," Debra questioned.

"Are you kidding me? The Notebook, Sweet Home Alabama, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, and Titanic? These are my choices," Ray whined.

"Well what do you want to watch," Debra asked.

"ESPN," Ray said half smiling.

"Yeah right Ray. Fine. If your not going to pick, I'll pick one. Let's watch the Notebook. I love that one," Debra said as she put the DVD in and snuggled up to Ray on the couch. Ray looked sick.

Since Ray had already lost out on the movie, he started thinking about the pizza. "Hey, what about the pizza," asked Ray.

"You're hungry already? Fine I'll order the pizza," Debra said frustrated as she paused the DVD.

When Debra called it seemed like she was talking to a deaf person. "I want a large pepperoni pizza delivered to 3394 Etan road. Mmhmm. Yes. Pepperoni please. Yes. Okay. Pepperoni! Okay. YES! Large? My gosh! PEPPERONI!" Click. "Finally," said a worn out Debra.

"So what did you order," asked Ray egging her on.

"Shut up Idiot," Debra replied and sat down next to Ray again. She restarted the movie and cuddled up to Ray again.

Ding Dong!

"You've got to be kidding me. Do NOT get that door Ray. This is supposed to be our quiet evening together," Debra demanded.

"I'll get it," Ray said. "Darn. I guess we'll have to pause this great movie again." Ray opened the door to see his mom and dad standing there.

"Happy New Year Ray," exclaimed Frank. "Your mother insisted we come over and have all of us discuss our New Years Resolutions. So what do you have to snack on, and what is that crap your watching? The Notebook? Wow Ray. There is a great man film," Frank said picking on his son.

"Listen you guys. We don't care about resolutions," Ray replied.

"How about never to answer the door again," Debra said under her breath.

"So what about the food," Frank asked again.

"We've got a pizza coming, but it's only enough for the two of us, and I'm sure you guys have other plans for New Years Eve," Ray said trying to get them to leave.

"Okay, Okay, we'll leave, but tomorrow we are getting together and writing down our resolutions for the new year. That way I can keep track of how we are doing and make sure none of us forget about them through the year," Marie said.

Debra restarted the DVD as Ray's parents were leaving; however, before Ray sat down the door bell rang again. Debra threw the remote and said, "That better be the pizza."

"Yeah, you mean your pizza boy. I see you brought the rest of the family," said Ray.

"Now the whole gang is here. Whoopy," Debra said sarcastically.

When the family finally sat down the whole family was arguing. Robert and Amy couldn't decide where to go for the evening so they just dropped in and continued their argument. Frank was still trying to get Marie off his back about the resolutions, and Ray was trying to get everyone out of his house. Frank grabbed the remote and turned the TV to ESPN which put Debra over the edge as she screamed, "Everyone out!"

"Well Debra, I can think of a New Years Resolution for you," exclaimed Marie.

Marie was arguing with Debra, Amy and Robert were still in a debate over where they should go, Frank was turning up the TV so he could hear, and Ray sitting on the couch actually wishing he was alone with Debra watching the Notebook. Ding Dong. It was the pizza guy. He was finally here and only three hours late. Debra had answered the door. It was 11:59 at night. The cute pizza guy saw that it had just turned midnight and figured it was time for a New Years kiss, so he grabbed Debra and planted one on her cheek. He exclaimed, "Happy New Year! The first pizza of the year is free. You guys have a great night." And he left. Debra was still standing there holding the pizza with the door open as Ray flew out the door after the pizza guy yelling. By the time Ray got back in, Robert and Frank had just about finished the pizza, and everyone was about ready to leave.

"Well, I suppose we should get going. There's a lot of football to watch tomorrow, and I need my rest for such a big day," decided Frank.

The four went home leaving Ray and Debra finally alone with no pizza and a first kiss of the year already gone.

Marie walked back in and said, "Thank you Ray for such a great party. Happy New Year!" Then she gave him a kiss on the cheek and left.

"Well I guess we each got our New Years kiss," Debra said smiling as she walked up stairs.