Note: Hi guyss. Sorry sorry for the long wait. Longgg wait, yes yes i know. But here it is! The Long awaited chapter! Im sorry for the grammar mistakes and the spelling too. I really am in a rush to type this considering I still have to do so much things. Wtf, freshman year is lykkk soooo unbearable. I am scared to know how the other years will be. Ahaha. Well on to it!
Chapter 15: (finally. Lol)
"Risa?" Kohori emerged from the kitchen carrying plates and utensils. It was time for dinner after all. The rich aroma of his cooking, slowly made it's merry way upstairs. Which he was sure the children could smell. He could hear them thundering downstairs already. The aroma was enough to signal dinnertime.
As he fixed the dinner table, he vaguely wondered where Risa was. He had called but she hasn't answered. He just brushed it aside, arguing that she couldn't hear him through the sound of the TV. It was rather loud. "Uncle Kohori," a voice interrupted. He turned to see Kaori step into the dining room and gave him a smile.
"Ah," he muttered in surprise, "Kaori! What are you doing here?"
"She came over," Kazuki replied as he let himself in as well. Kohori nodded and let out a merry grin, "Well the more the merrier right? Kazuki-kun, can you get another plate for Kaori then?"
"No." The answer took him by surprise, which made him stop his moving and stared at the boy. Since when was Kazuki this...rude? While he had caught on the several rebellious remarks these couple of days, Risa had proclaimed it was just a part of his 'rebellious stage.' Which she assured was normal and will past over quickly enough. He had taken her words and thought nothing of it, but something told him that it wasn't. He didn't know, it was just something. It wasn't fitting is all.
He had known Kazuki his whole life and not once had he been at all that rude. While it was just a simple answer, he hadn't once at all deny anything for Kaori. He had always had the impression that he had a soft spot for her.
"Ah, I'll get it!" Kaori cutted in before he could say anything. She even added, "In fact, I'll set the table! You go do stuff in the living room! Yeah!" With that she pushed him out, completely ignoring his mutters of protest. Soon he found himself along in the living room. He had expected Risa to belittle him about being kicked out of his own kitchen by a little girl, but go nothing. Not one word was spoken because no one was there.
"Risa?" he called glancing around the room. Odd. If Risa left she would have turned off the television. She was quite practical now. She would have said it was a waste of electricity and all that. Not that he minded anyway. "Risa?"
He almost panicked. He remembered telling her to stay in the room, and Risa doesn't exactly disobey something as simple as that. But a small little voice in his head argued that she may have gone to the bathroom or her room. Though the thought didn't make him feel any better. Did she go away because of his actions?
Was it because she was disgusted of the kiss? His proclamation of love? While it may only be just an idea, it seemed rather the most plausible scenario right now. And that was like an act of rejection to him. Just the thought made his heart clench.
Though somehow, it didn't seem at all that painful as it should. He was...rather use to it. Even as a teenager when he had met Risa, it was love at first sight. Of course she was with Otani and wasn't interested in him. He painfully remembered as she had smiled so beautifully on her wedding day, her man by her side. That man wasn't him. He remembered her frantic call when her water broke, and he rushed her to the hospital. She gave birth to two handsome boys that he always considered as his. But...they weren't his at all. It was all painful and he beared it all. So even if he faced rejection, he'll survive.
As he passed by the coffee table, his sight caught a ripped piece of yellow paper innocently placed there. He picked it up reading it's content and his heart stopped. "I'm sorry Kohori-kun." Those little words hastily written in an almost unreadable sentence just made him stop. IT made him feel like his heart had been stabbed and cut into pieces. He had a slight trouble breathing and his hand shook. He may be able to survive it but it didn't mean it won't hurt so much.
"So..she's going after him..." he whispered. He could see his vision blur, as tears welled up and he was helpless to stop it. His hand crunched the tiny piece of paper and he collapsed into the couch. He felt like howling for his sorrow and yet he had to keep as silent as possible. The children might see him like this. It was weakness unfit to see and he wasn't about to let them.
Oh god...he wanted to run after her. To shake her out of her deliria and show her that she's making a huge mistake. The wrong choice. Yes what held him back was her choice. He had to be selfless. He did love her. He valued her happiness. He wanted her happy. If this choice makes her happy, the why should he intervene? Why should he break her happiness? What right did he have to take away her happiness? As much as he wanted to, he couldn't. He wouldn't. But that doesn't mean that he would not leave her alone. He'll be there to see if she chose the right choice. To see if she's happy. He did adore her happy face. He loved her twinkling laugh. Her smile..he loved her so much. He-
"Dinner's all set!" Kaori made him jump as she came in. She caught sight of his tear-stricken face and he quickly looked away. Shit! She saw..She'll get curious. She'll tell everyone. She'll...
"Kaori, go ahead and eat without me. I'm not hungry."
"But...you're...Uncle, why are you crying?"
"Ah! It's nothing! I-I just have something in my eye! Go on!" he rubbed her eye and used his other hand to gesture her away. He let out a small smile reassuring her that everything is alright.
"Okay then," She went back and he let out a sigh. She bought it. He sniffed. He felt like a complete baby. A pathetic little baby. But...he crushed the note he held and let out a choked whimper. Heartbreak really hurts huh? Now he really knew what Risa felt.
Kaori slipped in her seat and muttered their Uncle's excuse. The boys thought nothing of it and dig into their meal. However, she was completely wrapped around it.
As she chewed on her food slowly, she shook her head at the excuse. Uncle was crying not because of something in his eye. She silently disapproved at the fact that he would even try to cover up something so painfully obvious. This is what she hated about adults. They treat them as little babies and think they can't understand the situation.
Well she certainly can comprehend what had happened. She can even go as far as bet htat Kazuki and Tenshi had slight suspicions of 'another woman' way before it was confirmed. Though it was only suspicions that they forgot most of the time. Children sometimes know more than adults. It was rather insulting to think that they are blind about everything around them.
Adults underestimate them sometimes. They would be quite surprised how much information they know and they can fully lay out what had happened detail by detail. A child doesn't just sit there and play. They observe things around them. That's how they learn right? So far the things she's observed gets twisted and twisted.
She lanced up at the boys in front of her. She had gotten through their thick, boyish skulls about the situation and yet they refuse to acknowledge her statement. Boys and pride. All the same. Pathetic. All the same Kazuki had been snappy towards her since she had shouted about their mistakes as straight forward as possible. She couldn't care less now considering he was still snappy to begin with. The only thing is that he was quite stupid to do it in front of Uncle Kohori. Especially when he didn't wan him to interfere with the situation.
As for Tenshi, he hadn't spoken a word to her. Though he seemed to want to talk to her, his pride held him back. So he just sat there silent and sometimes she could catch him staring at her nervously. At least Tenshi seemed tempted to talk. Unlike his prideful, stupid older brother who'd rather be a jerk than admit his mistake. Please, acting like that in fear of getting hurt. How honorable. Idiotic fits rather clearly in the sentence.
She'll handle it. She could get even she most unemotional person in the world to talk with such feeling. She can tackle this up front. That's the way mommy and daddy taught her.
"Risa..." Otani groaned as he ran his hands through her soft locks. They felt even softer than ever. How he chose that woman beyond her now seemed more idiotic as every second passed by.
As his hands glided through her back, memorizing every curve and inch. He couldn't help but rejoice. Who in the right mind wouldn't?
He was give a chance. One more chance. A chance he knew he couldn't ever get again. Something he didn't even earn. He couldn't help but encircle her in his amrs and never let go. To bask in her scent and relish the moment. Oh god, he missed it all. He missed the opportunities, the happy memories, he missed her so much.
Living without her was with no doubt dying and rotting in hell. He lived and witnessed it all. The hardships, the pain, the loneliness that eats up your every being. He just couldn't do it. He can't live without her. She was his life. His whole family was his life. They kept him alive.
He had to admit, that he had contemplated suicide countless of times. He was tempted to stab himself directly where it hurt; his heart. The kitchen knives seemed so inviting at one point that he found himself transfixed in a spot staring for hours. Of course somehow his body disobeyed every command. He knew he was scared to do it. He always has been. Yet it seemed to sing for him. It was so inviting and way better than his life now.
As he stared at her beautiful face he couldn't help but notice that she looked as tired as he had been. Yet she still retained that beauty that enticed him. To top it of, she seemed rather confused. Hesitant. Even as she pressed herself tightly against him, he could feel her slight doubt. Did she think it was a mistake?
While a part of him bloomed his sorrow of the situation, he had to understand it. It made sense? Would you trust someone that had hurt you? Would you trust someone who broke your trust? One who committed mutiny? He knew that even he would have doubts, as she had now. All natural instinct. As gently as he could he let out a smile, "Go to sleep. You need it."
She didn't protest as he dumped her on the couch but kept a tight grip on him. "Stay with me," she whispered. He had to laugh at her innocence. He had no where to go and he would kill to be here now. He nodded and let her snuggle against him as they positioned themselves into a comfortable position.
Before long Risa was asleep but he lay there full of worries of his own. While right now he was the happiest man on earth, he somehow always thought that it would end with sorrow. Almost every fantasy ends and faces harsh reality. He didn't know if she was truly staying with him. Even if she implied her love for him.
Otani let out a small sigh. Happiness never lasts long, though he somehow could bear a life without her in exchange for just a few more hours with her. With his family. These few precious hours saved him from the deliria he's been having. The dreams that haunted him. The memories that pained him. Each tore away from his sanity and he was on the verge of cracking.
He let out a bitter smile. Silently he wondered what would happen. If she stayed he would be the happiest organism in the universe. If she leaves...
He let out a bitter chuckle. He'll die. Not literally but his sanity would. Then left would be an empty shell full of regret. In the back of his mind he would blame someone else. Someone who cost him his life. Someone who stole his happiness. HER. Of course he knew that it wasn't her fault at all. He had a choice. He gave in. He failed. He lost. His fault.
It was all his fault, but yet revenge seemed to call his name. Perhaps his sanity was lost already. Then again, maybe not.
Risa had never had such a hard decision before. Even as she snuggled up against him, the question permanently stapled itself on her. Even as she ran out of the door, the question followed her. As she hear him profess his love, it lingered. Did she chose the right path?
Was her choice right? Did she choose something good for her family? Though it seemed like the choice was for herself. It was selfish. Though deep in her mind she thought she got it wrong, her heart singed she did.
"You chose wrong. Go back to Kohori. It's a mistake. The future of the children is with him. Go back."
"Otani is the right choice. You know that he can be forgiven by the children. You know that he can provide more. You know he won't fail. You know that he loves you. You picked right. Stay."
Each picked a point. Each shouted their arguments and she has never been his lost. She knew that Kohori was adored by the children. She knew he would be able to provide. She knew that he loved her and them. So why not?
But..but did she want to run back? Did she want to be with Kohori? The kiss...the kiss wasn't right. She was always a believer of knowing who your love is with a kiss and he wasn't it. Otani was. He had always been. So will she force herself to love him? To smile and mask her sorrow? To try her hardest to hide it to her children. She had to laugh at herself. She couldn't hide anything for her life. Kazuki had sharp eyes and could read her like a book. Tenshi was straight forward and could shock her into submission. They will wind up getting the answer. Will they like it?
She chuckled. Her children would blow up volcanic ash. Literally. They would drag her back to Otani and swallow their pride and smile at him sweetly. God she loved her children. But because she loved them, she would suck up her sorrow and be with Kohori if needed. If that gave them a future so be it.
Then again, whose to say that Otani couldn't give them a future. She knew that he loved kids. As a teenager till now he did. He had strange ways to show it but he was still loving. He could give them a future. He did have a steady job. Which she may add, he won't cheat on her again. With his new secretary, his dear mommy, there was no way. A woman ten feet away would be kicked out of the window. She really was a great mother-in-law. He could get the kids to like him. It was easy. He was someone to make anyone smile. It was talent, that's what she believed. Either it was his face, charm or idiotic actions he never fails to make someone laugh. Ultimately he'll get the boys to talk.
But that didn't help the problem much. What will she do? Who will she choose? Her eyes fluttered open, no longer able to sleep. What to do? What to do? Her eyes landed at Otani's face. He seemed asleep. How long has she been thinking? As she stared at him, she took note of his expression. Troubled. With good reason too. She bit her lip. Oh she didn't know. What to do? What to do?
With out warning his eyes opened and stared directly at hers. He seemed panicked and she could feel his hand grab her in a tight grip. His hands were cold and clammy. He looked like he saw a ghost. "Otani?"
His eyes widened and it took him a second to calm himself. Right now he really did look like a deer caught in headlights. He let out a small whimper and immediately buried himself on the crook of her neck. His grip tightened and she realized her was shaking. "Otani?"
"K-Koizumi...don't leave me." Her eyes widened and her voice froze in her throat. Not only did he say something so unexpected, he used her old name. He had disregarded her nickname saying that it seemed like they weren't married at all. By the time Tenshi was born it was completely forgotten. Though she had to admit, she missed it.
Pushing that aside she focused more on what he said. Don't leave him? This is why he was so panicked? So scared? Why he was shaking? Her mouth opened and she thought of the first thing that popped into her mind, "I...I won't?"
She grinned as the audience clapped into a thunderous applause. She shut the book tight and braced herself for the bright flashes that brought colorful lights to her vision. She gave a small bow in return as the applauding stopped. Who would have thought that her little romance book would receive so much praise? Though she was so thankful for it.
Today she was invited to read it to the fan club which she delightfully took. Now she sat grinning at the books' fans as she passed some copies of the books with her autograph. "Thank you so much," she said quieting them, "I didn't think that my little book would receive so much attention! Thank you! Uhm...Does anyone have any questions?"
Eager hands shot up and she picked a woman to her left. The woman stood clearly thrilled at being picked as said, "Is it true that the book was based on your personal experience?"
"You could say that," she answered giving her a sheepish smile. It was followed by murmurs from the crowd. She continued, "It's a lesson I don't think I'll ever forget."
Again the hands rose and she picked another woman. "Are you planning on making another book?"
"I'm not quite sure. Perhaps. We shall all see, however I don't guarantee there will be one. One book was rather hard enough...but I'll try my best."
By hours time she was whisked off, feeling tired up completely satisfied. Today was a good day. Her husband waited outside near the car and he grinned, "Had a good time Mrs. Otani?"
"Oh? Did anyone cry because it was so horrible that their ears bled?"
"Shut up Kazuki."
"Make me Kaori."
"That could be arranged. Have any duck tape?" He let out a laugh and opened the car door for her.
"We have to hurry. Mom and Dad expected us ten minutes ago. Thanks to your fan club we're already late."
"Oh?" She said buckling herself in. She could only smile. Good good. She had to thank them anyway.
Note: The end! It's done! Whoo! That took work! Hahaha. I slaved over this you guys. I'm sorry if it's disappointing in anyway. Sorry sorry. Again forgive me for the whole grammar, spelling thing. I'm not a gifted editor! I am a confused author. Ahaha.
Well Uhmmm telll me what you think of the ending. I myself is a bit satisfied but feel that I didn't hit the target at all. I lost my touch. Forgive me.
Ah...thank you so much for the support and reviews I have gotten. I thank you! I thank you!! Sooo much. I will try my hardest to get another story out soon. I'm just happy this is done though.
Oh yes...uhm did you get the ending at all. Cuz i feel that it may be a bit confusing. Tell me. And thank you for everything.