Ch

Ch.1

The Package

It's been a while since I've written something for Ed, Edd n' Eddy. If I had to make a rough guess, I'd say this fic will be about nine chapters long and I hope to update this fic every Saturday. Please R&R!


It was another warm, sunny afternoon at Peach Creek. Kevin was working on his bike in his driveway, Rolf was feeding his animals, while Jimmy, Sarah, Nazz, and Jonny stood in the lane, gazing at a small version of a Ferris wheel.

"Come one come all," began Eddy. "Come and ride Crazy Ed's Ferris wheel! Only twenty five cents for five minutes!"

Jonny took a couple steps forward, eagerness flowing through him. "Check it out Plank! Wanna ride it?"

Sarah, as usual, remained skeptical. "How do we know this piece of junk isn't just gonna break down as soon as we pay up?"

"There's no need for such concern Sarah," said Double D. "I've made sure the Ferris wheel has undergone several safety checks."

Jimmy tugged on the younger girl's arm. "Come on Sarah, this is one of the only rides I don't throw up on!"

Nazz shrugged hopped in line. "I guess I wouldn't mind going on a ride." Each of the kids took out a quarter, dropping it into Eddy's jar, leaving Eddy drooling with utter happiness as Double D helped the kids get loaded into their cars.

Eddy hurried over to Ed, who was hooked into a treadmill-like contraption. "You're up Monobrow!"

"Ookie dokie Eddy!" said Ed as he began to walk quickly on the treadmill. As he began to walk, the Ferris wheel began to turn at a steady pace, cheers of joy ringing from the kids.

"This is it Double D," said Eddy as he continued to gaze at his profit. "All Ed has to do is keep walking for a few minutes and its jawbreaker city!"

"Gertrude! Stop this instant!" The kids looked over to see Rolf chasing after one of his chickens down the lane.

A crazed look grew in Ed's eyes. "Chicken!" He ran as fast as he could, but since he was hooked into the treadmill contraption, he wasn't going anywhere. Unfortunately for the kids on the Ferris wheel, they were spinning round and round rapidly at unfathomed speeds until the gears counldn't take it any longer. The bolts broke loose, shooting the Ferris wheel straight into the air.

"Oh dear, this is not good!" Double D said as he trembled with worry.

Eddy, however, simply shrugged. "Huh, wouldn't wanna be them. Let's split and get some jawbreakers!" As they exited the lane, Eddy stopped suddenly, causing Double D to bump into him while Ed merely knocked the both of them over.

The smallest Ed shot Ed an icy glare before looking back at the street, a mail car driving down the street. "It's finally here!" He sprinted down the street towards his house, followed by his two friends.

"What are you talking about Eddy?" asked Double D, panting between words. "What's here?"

"Maybe it's the squirrel/otter hybrids of sector Q!" exclaimed Ed happily.

Eddy yanked the mailbox open. "No stupid, it's the latest issue of Bikini Babes! I gotta hide it before my parents find it!" As he looked inside the mailbox, however, Eddy growled with anger. "What the heck is this?" He took out the only contents of the mailbox: a small package.

Double D scratched his sock head in confusion. "I haven't the foggiest, but it has your name on it."

Eddy swiftly opened his package, revealing his gift. "Who sent me a DVD? Maybe it's a special video issue of Bikini Babes! Come on boys, let's drool over some hotties before we drool over the jawbreakers!"


The boys were soon sitting in front of Eddy's TV, Double D blushing slightly. "Um, I'm not sure if I should be watching this…"

"Don't be such a sissy Sockhead," sneered Eddy as he flipped the TV on. "Just sit back, relax, and…what the…?" Instead of skimpy-dressed woman, a cloaked figure sat in an armchair, which was difficult to see due to the dark background.

"Hello Eddy," said the figure, his voice low and chilling. "Do you know who I am?"

"Crackalodower, dark warlord of the lava mines of the doom solar system?" Ed guessed.

The man got out of his chair. "I'm the one who holds your brother captive." He walked over to the other side of the room, where a tall male was unconscious in shackles.

"That guy looks like your brother Eddy," said Ed.

"Ed, that is Chris!" shouted Double D.

Eddy, however, chuckled nervously. "Come on guys, this is probably some prank my brother and his college buddies are pulling."

The man took out a gun, holding it against his brother's head. "I could simply kill him right now if I wanted to. It's quite tempting really." After a few tense seconds, he lowered the gun. "But I won't get anything but a quick rush of satisfaction. I have a simple task for you. If you wish to see your brother again, then bring fifty million dollars to the Lingston hotel in Lemon Brook by midnight tomorrow."

"Fifty million dollars?" shouted the three in unison.

"Good luck," said the man before he sat back in his chair. "And by the way, if you don't ant your house to blow up, you better take the DVD out and dispose of it in the next thirty seconds." Without further ado, the screen went blank.

"Can we watch it again?" asked Ed.

"Shut up Ed!" shouted Eddy as he grabbed the DVD out of the DVD player. "Double D, think of something!"

Double D couldn't stop shaking as he tried his best to think. "I-I'm going to need a minute…"

"We don't have a minute!" snapped Eddy angrily. "We have twenty seconds!"

"I'll eat it!" said Ed as he went to take the DVD, but Double D stepped in front of him.

"Then you would blow up!" spat Double D. Eddy released a growl of displeasure as he rushed for the front door. Swinging it open, he chucked the DVD as far as he could, which happened to be where Kevin was standing.

Double D's eyes went as wide as a dinner plate as he watched the CD plummet towards Kevin. "Kevin, look out!"

"Shut up dorks!" shouted Kevin as he drew his attention away from his bike. However, he soon saw the DVD flying towards him. He quickly jumped out of the way, the DVD bouncing off the bike and clattering to the ground.

Kevin dusted himself off, gritting his teeth. "What was that for do…?" The DVD detonated, the explosion sending Kevin several yards away. Bike shrapnel flew everywhere, one of the wheels nearly missing the Eds while the handlebars crashed through the window. The Eds stood in utter silence, watching both the charred remains of the bike and Kevin groaning in pain.

A dumb expression split Ed's features. "Cool."


I hope everyone liked the chapter! Please R&R!