Title: Of Homework and Hormones

Summary: Aang was just a normal highschool kid waiting for someone to save him from his too-boring-to-believe life while secretly plotting his own suicide. Then he met Katara. AU Kataang

Warnings: AU, Crack, Minor Language, Slight Sexual Reference, and to all Zutarians out there—HERE BE KATAANG.

Pairings: Kataang, Tokka, Maiko, and a few mentions of Tyru, Longerbee, Yokka and Jetzula

A/N: This is not going to be a huge project; only a few chapters—anywhere between three to five. I'm too caught up to start something big again. I think I made Aang a bit too girly, though...I'm too used to writing Toph. : )

To: KickUrButt

From: 2Nice4U

Subject: Why do I feel so GIRLY messaging you when I could secretly be downloading Naruto episodes onto my laptop?


Oh my god.

Please tell me you see her, Toph. Otherwise I think I might be going insane. Hallucinating or something. Look—she's sitting right next to you. Y'know, the brunette with the blue necklace and the radiant smile? Isn't she...well...pretty?

I'm gonna PRETEND, for a second, that you actually CARE about my social life (don't deny it; for the two years I've known you all you've done is try to sabotage every friendship I've ever tried to get into except our own) and explain it so you can understand.

I think…I know this sounds spur of the moment and totally unlike me, but…

I think I'm in love.

Her names Katara Kuruk, and she's pretty and caring and kind and stunning and – well, you get the picture.

Oh, and that one guy? With the ponytail and the weird boomerang fetish? That's her brother. So now, if you guys ever get married, you'll be my SISTER IN LAW!

I've even held a sensible conversation with her!

…Well, okay, I talked to her ONCE. And it went like this:

Me: (waking up after getting knocked out by Azula's purse) Ugh…

Katara: (leaning down over me) Are you okay? It looks like you'll have a bruise on your head. Who hurt you, anyway?

Me: (too love struck to speak) Guh….um…Azula…

Katara: I should kick her butt! Come on, Sokka – let's go make her apologize!

Me: …

Yes, Toph. That is the great extent the conversation between my dream girl and me went.

You can laugh.

Hopelessly in love,


To: 2Nice4U

From: KickUrButt

Subject: GASP! BETRAYAL! Looks like you have some shrine burning to do tonight.



This is truly the SHALLOWEST and RIDICULOUS thing you've ever asked of me. After you've officially decided to marry and worship someone you've only just met five seconds ago, you don't want to know if I think she's DUMB or UGLY or SELFISH or ABUSIVE. You don't wanna know if she's SINISTER or SHEEP-HERDING or HITLER-OBSESSING or even REMOTELY POSSIBLE OF BECOMING A THIRD-WORLD DICTATOR.

Nope. All you care about is whether I think she's pretty or not.

Okay, for a second, for all sense and purposes, all PRETEND that I actually care and admit that her facial features are...slightly...pleasant to gaze upon.

Or so I'm assuming, since I can't see them. (HELLO. DUH. BLIND.)

Moving on.

Ponytail? Boomerang? Yeah, I know him. He made me laugh...not that I care.

And MARRY HIM! Well...uh...shut up.

That is not a conversation. That is a persuasive female using her powers of charm and good looks to temporarily zap your brain to mush and make you THINK you're in love with her.

Alright, I'll laugh. HA. HA.


To: KickUrButt

From: 2Nice4U



Alright, alright, I'm sorry. I...err...should have asked whether she was 'REMOTELY POSSIBLE OF BECOMING A THIRD-WORLD DICTATOR' instead...?

I'll admit it. When I read that, I cracked up.

'Her facial features are...slightly...pleasant to gaze upon'? Really? That actually kinda nice for you. Normally you'd label her 'horrendously and awfully disfigured for life and naturally repelling to boot.'

Oh, come on. You know you would. (Even though you really can't say anything like that. It's considered invalid.)

He made you laugh...not that you care. Well, you don't care about anything, Toph, so I'm not all that surprised.

Hm...do you think it's worth becoming a stalker and risking ten years in jail for a picture of Katara in a swimsuit?


Hopelessly in Love,


To: 2Nice4U

From: KickUrButt

Subject: Yes, Twinkle Toes. The SHRINES. Aka, the Reason You Live. Cuz seriously, it's gettin' OLD. (I know the reason that you're home on Saturday nights. Homework? Pshaw. THEN WHAT THE HELL WE'RE YOU DOING WITH A HUNDRED AND FIFTY FOUR "KEEP UNTIL I DELETE" NARUTO EPISODES ON YOUR TIVO, HM?!)


...Thank you for apologizing. Because, you know, I'm always right and crap.

Yes, Twinkle Toes, normally I would call her 'horrendously and awfully disfigured and naturally repelling to boot', but I am in a VERY good mood today.

You. A stalker? Don't make me laugh. That is impossible for an infinite number of reasons, three of which I shall put here:

1. You're too nice to invade anyone's privacy, let alone that of the girl you're supposedly in love with.

2. If you ever got sent to jail, I'd kill you, I swear. Although I really, really, REALLY hate to admit it, you are without a doubt one of my closest friends (I know--pathetic, isn't it?) So, therefore, because I am The God of the Universe, you cannot and will not do anything with the remote possibility of getting you locked up.

3. NEWSFLASH. Haven't you heard? Katara and Sokka moved here from COLORADO. In a SMALL MOUNTAIN VILLAGE. I don't think that she's going to be bringing any swimsuits with her.

...Although that may change soon. They're opening up a water park near the local Six Flags (Yeah, Twinkle Toes. THE PLACE OF YOUR CHILDHOOD NIGHTMARES).

Seriously. You need to conquer your fear of the kiddie coaster. It shames me just to LOOK at you.

...And also there's no way in hell I'm gonna ride Mr. Freeze if you don't come with me. (And no, I'm NOT afraid. I just want my first time to be filled with the wonderfully amusing sounds of your incredibly girly pansy-ass screams.)

The Subject of Your NIGHTMARES,


To: 2KickUrButt

From: Nice4U

Subject: There all Gyatso's, I swear! He just has a...Naruto fetish...


I'm honored that you believe I'm that nice.

But, really. I'd KILL for a picture of Katara in a swimsuit.

PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME GO ON THE KIDDIE COASTER! It's SCARY, Toph. VERY scary. I can't help it if you tough and I'm not.

No. I put my foot down. See? Didn't you hear me stomp? I am NOT riding that...DEMON COASTER. IT IS EVIL. It wants me dead...like Ozai.

Oh my god...Ozai...He's looking at me all gloatingly, like he's noticed I'm not doing anything remotely math-related. What if he gives a pop-quiz! I didn't study for a math test!

Oh my GOD, he's coming over here. Please, Toph, HELP—

"Mr. Yangchen."

Gulping, I quickly shut my laptop and slowly met Professor Ozai's gaze. I tell you, he's scary. Especially for a math teacher.

"Would you like to share your correspondence with Miss Bei Fong with the rest of the class?" he smirked down at me, waggling an eyebrow. Ew. God. I think the man thinks its sexy or something—

It isn't. It's actually faintly creepy.

"I was just...err...asking her to...um..." I scrambled for an answer. "Explain last night's homework to me! Yeah!"

Ozai narrowed his eyes at me, lips curling up in a triumphant smile. "Mr. Yangchen, you did absolutely perfectly on yesterday's assignment—not a single question wrong." Ozai let the sentiment hang in the air, before continuing, "What do you have to say to that, hm?"

With a poorly concealed wince, I proposed weakly, "I...cheated?"

Ozai frowned, and slapped his palm against my desk with a loud clap. I reeled, and flinched at the sudden noise, as he barked out at me, "Detention! After school today, Mr. Yangchen, in my room. And leave your laptop," he indicated my baby—hem, electronic device—with undisguised disgust, "in your locker. Understood?"

I nodded seriously. "Sir yes sir!" I shouted out, saluting him in one choppy motion and jumping out of my chair for the effect.

Ozai glared at me. "Seat yourself, Mr. Yangchen, before I give you detention for all of this week!"

I nodded sharply, and stiffly sat back down in my chair. "Yes, Sir!"

A musical giggle erupted from the doorway of the room. Heart pounding, I turned to see the Love of my Life, hand over her mouth as if to rebuke her outburst.

Okay, so you don't believe me. You probably think it's one of those dumb highschool crushes. Or worse, that I'm just a lousy dirtbag only interested in getting into a girl's pants.

But it's love. I swear it is. She's perfect—beautiful, caring, amazing in every way...

The bell rang with a loud, shrill call, and I gathered up my books absently for English. My eye caught Katara's, and my heart fluttered as she smiled at me. Falling in step next to her as we exited the room, I said, friendliest I could, "Hi. My name's Aang. And you're Katara, right?"

She nodded briefly. "Yeah. Nice to meet you, Aang." Twisting her hand underneath her armful of textbooks, she locked her fingers with mine briefly.

Skin tingling where Katara had touched it, I managed to get out through my lovestruck daze, "What's your next class?"

Please make it English. Oh God, please make it English.

"English," Katara replied quickly, as I sighed in relief.

"That's great! I have English, too!" I exclaimed, smiling widely.

"Great!" she flashed me a smile. "Could you show me where it is?"

"Sure!" I answered immediately. Actually, we were kinda beginning to sound like one of those cliché what-to-expect-for-high-school crappy videos they show you in eighth grade. It was time to mix things up a bit. "You know, I...err..." unable to come up with anything interesting to say, I finished lamely, "I watch Naruto, Bleach, Fullmetal Alchemist, Death Note, and InuYasha!"

Oh, great, Aang. Now's the perfect time to tell her about your manga and anime fetish.

Luckily for me, though, Katara seemed distracted. Gazing around the hall, she said absently, "That's great, Aang!" I followed her line of vision, and my stomach lurched.

Oh no. She was looking at Jet, the school dirtbag. The mother of all assholes. The reason I couldn't get to sleep at night.

Well, kind of.

Jet had a reputation as a player. He'd dated nearly every girl in the school, broken every one of their hearts, and now it looked like Katara had fallen for him as well!

"Uh...look!" I yelped suddenly, dragging Katara down the hall and away from Jet. "A vending machine!"

"Oh, yeah, we had those in Colorado, too," she muttered distantly, a dreamy look in her eyes.

"Um...yeah! Well, we kinda have to get to class now!" As I pulled her along, I came uncomfortably aware how cool and smooth her hand was in mine. Relaxed and partially limp in my grip, I could nearly feel the trust radiating off of her; trusting me to keep her safe while she was off in la-la land. And oh, how honored I felt to be the object of her almost-affections.

When we finally reached the English room, I released her hand a bit regretfully and announced, "Here we are, Katara!"

She jerked her head up, as if awakening from a daze with a sharp jolt. "Thank you, Aang! I would never have found it on my own..." Katara trailed off, expression dreamy once more.

I shrugged, a bit embarrassed. "Well, Professor Long Feng is pretty much a bastard, so you probably won't be thanking me once we're in class."

She giggled, lovestruck expression clearing once more. "I'm sure he is. I wonder..." Her face turned mischievous. "Hey, wanna play a joke?"

"What?" I asked casually, leaning on the lockers outside the classroom, and painfully aware of everything from Katara's deep, blue eyes, to her curly locks of chocolate-brown hair.

Katara leaned forward conspiratorially, cheeks tinted red. It was only a moment later that I finally realized why. "You know how teachers hate it when they come in to see couples making out?"

"I don't see—" Something clicked, and I found myself blushing furiously as well. "Um, yeah. So, you want to...?"

She nodded, obviously excited despite her embarrassment. "Yeah! It'll be perfect!"

"Err—yeah!" I lied, eye twitching. "Perfect!"

Now, don't get me wrong. I wanted to kiss Katara, sure. But the problem was...

See...I was kinda...err...inexperienced. And I didn't wanna let her down and ruin our relationship forever. Hell, I didn't wanna let her down period. But it didn't seemed that I wouldn't get a chance to reconsider.

"Let's go!" Pulling me in to the classroom, Katara led me to a seat right in the front, before the teacher's desk. I gulped. Now everyone would be able to see us!

"Okay, you sit down there," Katara instructed. I obliged, albeit nervously.

When Katara slipped on top of me, I began full out sweating. As Katara turned her head so her hair tickled my nose, I stifled a sneeze.

Craning her head around, she looked up at me—straight into my eyes. The desk must have pressed painfully into her black, as she was forced to shove her nose against mine.

I gulped. "So—err—now, right?" I said awkwardly, as she nodded, blushing just the tiniest bit. It was actually kinda cute.

Drawing in my breath, I leaned forward, turning my head so our faces interlocked like the pieces of a puzzle. Our lips drew tantalizingly close, almost brushing, as Katara half-closed her eyelids. For a taste of her lips, I'd have give anything…

I was pretty good at narrating this kissing stuff, wasn't I?

But I was ready and going steady. Gently reaching around to cradle the back of her head, I licked my lips and went in for the kill. Our lips brushed with a bolt of electricity, and then we were going at it like I'd only ever seen in the movies—

Well, actually, that was my reference—the movies. And then that kiss between Jack and Elizabeth in Pirates of the Caribbean

"Yangchen. Kuruk." I looked up, flushed, to see Long Feng himself towering over us. Blushing, I realized my predicament—my fingers entangled in Katara's hair, and she'd wormed her way completely onto my lap, knees divided against my stomach. Katara's heart throbbed painfully against mine, and her warm breath came in shallow gusts against my cheek.

Wow, we were intimate, weren't we?

"Get off of him. Now," he told Katara curtly, glaring at me. I looked away, whistling a merry tune to myself, and trying to get the message across—Who? Me?

Long Feng's lips curled in a sneer. "Since your obviously so close already, Yangchen, Kuruk, why don't you do a little extra assignment for me? I little…introduction." He slapped my desk, and I jumped back, startled. "Fifteen hundred words, by tomorrow! Biography…on each other of course."

I hung my head and tried to look remorseful, while inwardly screaming Yes! Yes! Finally!

This was all I needed to jumpstart our relationship….and convince Katara that I was the one for her.

"So…that is the story of my life," Katara finished, licking around her strawberry ice-cream cone as I took meticulous notes, below:

Things I Know About Katara Kuruk

1. Katara is 15 years old.

2. And already a nation-wide tai-chi champion practitioner.

3. But even though she could kick any guy's ass from here to Timbuktu, her ambition is to one day become a doctor, like her mother.

4. Speaking of family, Sokka Kuruk is her brother.

5. And he has a weird obsession with boomerangs.

6. Which also tends to annoy Katara a lot

7. Among other things, she hates:

a: unfairness

b: prejudice

c: fire

8. She moved her from a small town in Colorado because her father got a lame new job here in South Carolina

9. Which was also an incredible stroke of luck

10. Because I never would have met her otherwise.

We were at the local Baskin Robbins, due to a mutual craving for ice-cream. Of course, I'd been thrilled at her suggestion, and agreed immediately…

Unfortunately, I'd forgotten a crucial fact: Jet worked at Baskin Robins after school—don't ask me why. I guess he has a sweet tooth or something like that.

I mean dirtbag-Jet. Player-Jet. Asshole-Jet.

Yeah. That Jet.

Glaring at the man in question, I looked in despair at the light blush tinting Katara's cheeks. It had been there ever since she'd come in, and been greeted smoothly by our favorite heart-breaker.

Also on the unfortunate, Katara had done little, if anything, to react to me after our woefully short make-out session. I was just the tiniest bit miffed…but I guess I couldn't blame her if she really only thought of me as a friend.

I was just really, really determined to maybe-kind-sorta change that fact in the near future.

The tiny bell rang as the door opened, and my favorite abusive best friend walked in. "Toph, hi!" I waved to her enthusiastically, like the optimist I am.

"Twinkle Toes," she greeted, taking a break from her animated conversation with a dark-skinned boy I took to be Katara's brother—what was his name again? Oh, yeah—Sokka…

"Hi, Sokka!"

Katara smiled at me, before adding in, "Yeah, hi, you big oaf!"

"This is Toph," I introduced. "We've been friends since kindergarten…"

Her smile disappeared. Suddenly, I got the feeling that Katara was very, very unhappy with this revelation. "Oh, really? That's…nice." She smiled frostily at Toph, who scowled back—not that she could help it. Toph's not very good with facial expression, seeing as she's actually blind. Although, actually, she can get away with pretty much anything because of it—even wearing headphones in class, as that's really the only way she can use a computer.

"Sokka, come over here!" Katara cried, waving him over, eyes glinting evilly. Now, normally I wouldn't use anything close to the word 'evil' to describe my dream girl, but Katara can be pretty fiendish when she wants to. "Do you wanna hear this too, Toph?" she asked innocently.

I groaned inwardly as she launched on a detailed explanation of our in-class prank. God, Katara thought Toph and I were girlfriend and boyfriend or something! Don't get me wrong—I was still in love with her, but jeez, this was really gonna complicate things…

I watched in dismay as Sokka leaned in suspiciously and Toph leaned against the wall, expression gleeful, yet gleaming with pure evil. I winced as I anticipated the former's upset reaction.

Wait…that was her brother.

She was telling him about how we made out in class.

And was it just me, or was Jet looking a little smugger than usual?

…Okay. I had only one think to say about this.


I had nothing to say about this.



….Well, shit.

Next chapter, I believe, will be from Katara's POV. Then--although it depends--I might do a chapter from Toph's POV, then one from Sokka's, and then maybe one from Mai and one from Zuko--kinda like a three-ship arc, with first Kataang, than Tokka, then Maiko. But I'm still debating it, so please tell me what you think I should do.