DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own Harry Potter, or any of the characters mentioned in this story, unless stated otherwise. Rated for some sexual content, violence and language. Any similarities to real life are purely coincidence and I will not be held responsible! Thanks!

WARNING: WILL CONTAIN SLASH (male on male) and THREESOME (a big mass of sweaty bodies doing it)!! Ye be warned

Author's Note: a GREAT idea my friend and smut-catalyst Decimare came up with. Again. LMAO. Here we go. Cheers!




"I know you want to Remus…"

"What part of no don't you understand?"

"The 'no' part?"

"No means no!" Remus harrumphed and sat back. It was entirely Sirius' fault they were in this mess in the first place. He sighed heavily and thought back to that morning in Transfiguration…

He had sat down in his regular seat, next to Sirius, behind James and Peter, to the left of Lily, who sat in the next desk beside him. At the back of course. How could the Marauders possibly plot mayhem in the front?

Sirius had been unusually frisky since he'd gotten up, even for him. So it was no surprise really, when the Animagus' hand slid over his thigh, and a deep voice growled low into his ear, "Mooney…I want you so bad…"

"That's nice," he replied as McGonagall walked in, and merely pulled out his books. One gets to learn that divulging Sirius Black only leads to getting oneself into trouble.

"I don't think you understand Mooney…I need you." His hand slid over the thigh, squeezing, and Remus felt his heart begin to pound.

"Padfoot, pay attention," he whispered back. The hand slid upward, caressing the front of his trousers and he felt his cock hardening traitorously.

"But I can't when you're sitting there all tasty and hot." His fingers caressed the now rather prominent bulge in his boyfriend's pants. His mouth was hot over Remus' neck, his lips caressing the smooth flesh. "I want to suck your cock Remus," he murmured. "Make you come…mmm…"

Remus shuddered involuntarily. "Keep this up and I'll never sleep with you again," he replied, hating that he sounded breathless just the same.

"Mr. Black," said a rather harsh voice, and two dozen pairs of eyes turned to them. McGonagall looked stern and Remus felt the blush creeping up his neck, as Sirius pulled away from him. "If you would kindly pay attention, this work will be on your NEWTs."

"Sorry Professor, I had to tell Remus something urgent."

McGonagall gave a little glare, and then went back to teaching. And Sirius' hand slid back over his lover's crotch.

"Sirius," Remus said, trying not to pant as Sirius stroked him, "stop…now."

Sirius pouted in the sexy way he had mastered at the age of twelve. "But you want it…and I want it…" His lips brushed over the shell of Remus' ear. "Don't tell me you don't want me to fuck that delectable arse of yours into next week…" he purred.

"Shut it," Remus growled back.

"We can hear you y'know," said James over his shoulder.

"Sod off Prongs," Remus muttered.

"Mooney's just sensitive because he needs to get laid."

"Sirius, shut the fuck up," snapped Remus with as much malice as he could muster in his current state. Which was woefully not a lot.

"You know it's true darling," Sirius whispered. "I know you want my cock in you, sliding in and out, so hot…"

Remus shuddered, and couldn't take it a moment longer. "Shut up!" Remus shouted, standing up. Everyone looked at him, then to Sirius, and then back at him. He sat down again, red-faced, as snickers and whispers and much speculation flew about the room.

"Silence!" McGonagall barked. "Mr. Lupin, since you seem unable to control yourself, you will receive detention. Seven o'clock sharp, here."

"It's not his fault!" Sirius cried. "Really!"

McGonagall raised her brow. "Thank you for owning up to your part Mr. Black. You may join your friend in detention. Now not another word out of either of you, or it will be an entire week's worth of detentions!"

So, here they were. In detention. And Sirius was still trying to get into his pants. Or get him out of them at least…

McGonagall looked up sharply from her desk. Remus knew she suspected them of trying to plot some sort of prank (how rude, as if he did it willingly) and would be watching them like a hawk. But then she stood.

"I need to go take care of a few things. You will remain here, silently, until I return." Both boys nodded, and with one last glare, she swept form the room.

Sirius' lips were on Remus' neck as soon as the door closed.

"Sirius, you are incorrigible…" Remus panted as the Animagus' tongue slid out to taste his pulse point.

"Thank you. Now shut up and put that mouth to good use." He smirked as Remus opened said mouth to retort angrily, but Sirius merely kissed him, his tongue pushing into the warm, wet cavern, and Remus fell silent. Mostly due to the fact he had a tongue that wasn't his own in his mouth.

Sirius kissed him slowly, lovingly, stoking the fiery passion in his boyfriend, until the werewolf was clutching him, pulling him closer, and trying to get some blessed friction on his rock hard cock.

"What was that you were saying about no meaning no?"

"I meant yes. Merlin, Padfoot, yes…" Sirius slid his hands up under Remus' shirt, rolling his nipples and making the lycan gasp.

Their mouths met again, hungry and passionate, and they completely forgot the fact they were in detention. Until the door opened; or rather, until McGonagall walked back through the door after opening it and cried, "Merlin's pants!" They broke apart, both hazy-eyes and flushed from their kissing. Remus' face burned with embarrassment. Sirius, as expected, looked supremely unconcerned.

"Hello Minerva. Sorry, didn't hear you come in."

McGonagall gaped. Sure, everyone knew Sirius Black had cheek, but…well this was crossing the line! Crossing the line, going back, and tap dancing on the fucking line!

Remus glared at his boyfriend. "Do you want to get a month's worth of detentions?" he hissed. Sirius smirked.

He walked right up to his Professor, and casually slung an arm around her shoulders. "You know," he purred into her ear. "I'm sure I could persuade Remus to having you join us. If you'd like."

McGonagall felt her control slip as moisture gathered in her knickers. She opened her mouth to speak, but Sirius put a finger over her lips. "Shh…" he crooned gently. The finger slid down her chin, over her neck, and down between her bosoms, fire igniting in its wake, and spreading warmth through her veins. It had been a long time… And if these two young men were willing…

She gasped as her knickers soaked through, and looked at the dangerously alluring silver eyes of Sirius. He smiled softly, and gently drew her chin forward, pressing his lips softly to hers. "I always knew you were a minx Minerva…"

Remus gaped. He was on acid, or dreaming or…or in some sort of really fucked up parallel universe, because there was no way his boyfriend was snogging McGonagall…none. Then both of them turned to him. He swallowed nervously. The madness was spreading, as McGonagall now looked at him with the same sort of hungry, lascivious look as Sirius was sporting.

The next thing he was really aware of, was that he was lying on the desk, and McGonagall was above him, and he was snogging her senseless. Sirius must have been somewhere behind her, working his magic, as she moaned into Remus' mouth, and her hips bucked forward, pressing her womanhood to his trapped erection.

Clothes were shed in a frenzy of hands, gripping and pulling until skin rubbed against skin, and the heavenly friction between pussy lips and cock was achieved. Minerva slid onto Remus' impressive length, gasping in time with the young werewolf, as Sirius filled her from behind, his erection swelling into her.

She lie there as the darker haired youth pistoned in and out of her, gripping her hips and using them as leverage. Every thrust from behind pulled her from Remus' cock, every withdrawal pressing her back, shoving his member in deeper. It was a symphony of ecstasy, all three of them moaning and calling in time.

Remus threw inhibition to the wind, and greedily molded the generous swells of his Professor's breasts in his hands. He pulled on the nipples, making her whimper, as Sirius smirked down from over them.

Her orgasm came first, clenching both Sirius and Remus' erections as she rode out the delectable waves of pleasure, and when Remus managed to open his eyes, he saw Sirius staring back at him, pupils flared with sex and passion and love and Remus arched, seed shooting deep. Sirius lost himself with his lover's cries and with shuddering force, emptied himself inside McGonagall.

They were panting, and a thin, sheer veil of sweat covered all three of them, all trying to steady the frantic beating of their hearts.

Sirius pulled away, and Minerva levered herself with surprising agility off of Remus, who sat up in turn. A faint blush tinged his cheeks as he pulled his clothing back on and Sirius chuckled quietly next to him.

An awkward silence stretched as the two boys sat themselves back down in their seats, and McGonagall pushed a tendril of hair that had come loose from her eyes. "Well," she said briskly, as though she hadn't just let two of her students ravage and plunder her womanly gifts in her classroom. "I trust the two of you have learned your lesson?"

Sirius snorted, and Remus elbowed him. "Yes Professor," he said quietly.

She nodded. "Very well, you're free to go. But I don't expect either of you to ever talk in my class again."

The two gathered their things. "We'll do our best Minerva," Sirius said, and with a saucy wink at her, pulled Remus out of the room. McGonagall stared after them and shook her head. Sirius Black was going to be the death of her… Especially if she ever found herself on the receiving end of his cock again. Merlin.


"So how was detention with McGoogly?" James asked as his friends sat down in the common room across from him. Lily glared over the top of her book and he grinned at her.

Remus couldn't help but giggle and Sirius smiled with him. "It was fine," he said casually.

"Nothing too hard then?" Peter asked.

Padfoot smirked now. "Oh there was a couple hard things," Remus snorted, "but on the whole, I don't think I mind detention with McGonagall."

"Very enjoyable on the whole," Remus confirmed. "Very."


Author's Note: and there we are. I bet there are a couple of you who are cringing right now, and probably more than a few who think I'm fucked up for sure. Meh. You're probably right. (insert grin here). Don't forget to drop me a line!! Cheers!