Summary: ok. let's get on thing straght. This story is not finish yet. This is the beginningof a chapter i haven't finished yet. I wanted to see what people thought of it so fat, though!I really hope somebody does read this, since I'm new here and I've never really written storiessince the 6th grade. but please, be honest! Flame me if u have to! I want as much criticism asas I can get! take out ur flamethrowers, sic axel on me, I'll take anything. I want to make this story better! But, please, no cursin'. And tell me what i can do to make this story better! thx!:)
It was raining hard at Memory's Skyscraper that evening. There were little puddles all across the street, collecting more drops as the rain refused to stop. The city buildings around the area all had their large neon signs flickering on and off, adding irritating zapping noises to the already obnoxious sounds of the thundering and pitter pattering of the storm. Besides the neon lights, the place was pretty much dark.
Yes, it was a dark place. The tall, ominous building, known as Memory Skyscraper itself, stood high in the darkness in an eerie way. Its jumbo TV screens, perched all the way on the top of the gloomy architecture, displayed random images of past events about people nobody could even hope to know. Perhaps it showed all the bad that happened to these individuals, or even all the good fortune. Maybe, it was a video that, if you stayed to watch the whole thing, would cause your death after seven days. Who knows? Who cares? There were better things to do than analyzing random images on a television screen. But, still, it just added on to the eeriness you could just feel in this area.
Come to think of it, this whole place, with the ill-boding, monumental skyscraper and the dark, gloomy buildings surrounding it, screamed horror movie. You know, the bloodcurdling, spine-chilling, hair-rising, heart stopping, you-better-close-your-eyes-before-you're-scarred-for-life movies we've all come to know and love! Yeah, you know those movies. Well, this place SCREAMED it! And the boisterous thunder, pouring rain, and once thought annoying neon light zapping noise brought even more of the creepiness to this abandoned street corner from hell. Yep, this was the perfect place for a fatal meeting between two random figures for the fight to the death.
Almost as if on cue, the first shadowy figure came in, striding to one side of the capacious street in front of the looming building. The figure appeared to be a beanstalk; he was tall and lanky. Yet, surprisingly, he moved with a certain grace and agility that told you he was used to his angular frame. There was also a little sense of arrogance about him, but just a little. He wore a long black trench coat; he also wore black gloves and boots to match. His black hood shrouded his face, covering him from head to toe, which wasn't a bad idea, considering the amount of rain that was gushing into this place. He strode to his spot, waiting for his opponent to step into the ring.
Sure enough, out came a second figure, who trudged off to the other side of the pavement, opposite the black string bean. This individual also sported a black trench coat, just like his opponent, but other than that, they were complete opposites. He seemed to be a very small individual. Some might assume him to be a child, or at least a young teenager. He didn't move with the same grace and agility as his adversary. He also didn't have the same sense of arrogance, either. More of a sense of nervousness. It wasn't the most obvious thing in the world, but you could see it in the way his hands shook, his fingers looking like they itched for something to get a hold of. He ambled to his spot, putting on a brave front.
They both stood there for a moment, gazing at each other from opposite sides of the pavement. Then, the taller being seemed to raise his arms to the skies, in a much exaggerated manner. After this embellished approach, he crouched down to the floor, this time throwing his skinny arms to the sides. He appeared to be trying to summon something, his whole body quaking with self exertion. Sure enough, black shadows danced across his toned arms, and, in a burst of flames, a spinning chakram appeared in each hand with a dazzling display. In fact, the whole place seemed to be on fire, licks of flames spreading everywhere across the floor. At a certain point, the flames stopped, and rose, causing an inescapable wall of flames. All the while, the dark figure seemed to enjoy the turmoil he was causing. You could see the playful smirk under the shadows of the hood. Other bystanders would've thought that this man was some sort of dark entity. A very flamboyant dark entity. It seemed like this mysterious 'demon' was putting on a show for an invisible audience that no one could see. Perhaps, he really was just arrogant. The demon looked up, arms still out, waiting to see what his opponent's response was to his grand performance.
At first, the shorter individual seemed frightened, maybe even petrified. But then, he remembered the most crucial detail that one needed to win a battle: his weapon. He stuck his hand out, and the weapon emerged in a flash of light. It was a key. A giant, silver key. If there was an invisible audience out there, said audience might be betting their money on the flaming flagpole standing opposite him on the street. Still, a sense of panic seemed to be lifted from the figure's shoulders. His fingers also seemed to have found their fix, for now they had stopped shaking and were clasped firmly over the golden key handle. The key seemed to have given him the boost of confidence he needed, and he even seemed to glow. Light appeared to be emitting from the key, which in turn, made the tiny warrior emit the same glow. Others would've mistaken him for an angel, if it wasn't for the lack of wings. The little angel stood crouched, key in both hands. He glared at his enemy, waiting to see what he had in store for him.
So, was it any good? Did I use to many words? Does it look like i'm trying too hard? Did I paint a good picture in ur head? Did i describe the characters and setting right? Please, be honest, and thnx for reading!:) Oh, and the story is supposed to be about Roxas and Axel, obviously. But, surprisingly, it's not really adverture, i just wanted to start it with a good fight scene! Yay, violence! (jk!) thx, and God bless u all!
Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom hearts or the Ring (i think i'll be too scared to own that:)