A/N set after anime, so contains spoliers of last episode.
Failure, stupid, reckless, useless
The raindrops were like a mantra ticking off in her head. She turned her stare to the window, the stare that could make grown men piss themselves, yet it was powerless against the thundering sky. It would have to start raining wouldn't it? The irony of it was not lost upon Riza Hawkeye. Rain was a thing she had learnt to hate during her years as the flame alchemist's aide. It was the one element that she as his protector had to function in without error, as he himself was defenceless in it. And now as she stood at his bed side, it was if someone up there was laughing at her.
Unworthy, imperfect, disappointment, weak
The beat had started once more. She shook her head and turned away from the rest of the world, her attention returning to the man in front of her. She reached for his hand as she had done so many times before, holding it firmly in her grasp as if that itself could bring him back to her. It had been almost two weeks since the assassination of Fuehrer Bradley. So far, the colonel's injuries had started to heal nicely, and although it would be a while before he could be discharged, the doctors were certain he would make a full recovery. That is apart from the loss of his eye
Lightning flashed illuminating the room for a moment, but Riza Hawkeye barely blinked. As a soldier from the military she had been trained only to react to what was necessary, and considering the things that she had witnessed over the past few years it was almost laughable that a simple flash of light would scare her. Her thoughts were focused upon the past. She had sworn to protect him, yet hear he was, unconscious in a hospital all because of her. If only she had gotten there earlier! If she had been there, Archer would have never even have got anywhere near him, she was certain of that. She wasn't the best sharp shooter in the military for nothing. Her hands trembled slightly. What was he going to say when he woke up? When he found out that he no longer had the use of his eye? A single tear rolled down her face, hitting the hand encased in her own.
The rain cascaded down upon the window, a mirror image of the tears that coursed down the Lieutenant's face. She dropped Mustang's hand as she raised her own trembling pair to her eyes, determined to blot out the emotion that forced out. She cannot break down again. Emotions caused weaknesses, a weakness that the enemy could exploit at any given moment. No soldier could show weakness and Riza Hawkeye was a model soldier. But she couldn't shake this. Her sobs found an escape from the well placed mask and the tears continued to drip across her face. How could she live with herself knowing what she had done? The only thing she had to do was protect him, that was it and she simply couldn't do it. Their plan had been perfect, except for her, the one weak link. And still the rain poured, making a mockery of her despair.
"Rii...zza?" her head snapped up at the sound of a voice so soft from lack of use that she was sure she had been dreaming at first. But through the blur of her tears, she saw him, his eye open, a look of mild surprise on his face. The remaining tears that had collected within her eyes began to shed, coursing slowly in a downwards spiral. There was silence as the two simply gazed at each other. Then slowly but determinedly he raised a trembling hand towards her glistening face. Gently he
lifted her chin with his thumb, wiping away each of the trails of tears one by one with the pads of his fingertips. He smiled a true warm smile as he gazed into her face.
"Riza...this really won't do. You know how useless I am in the rain" Roy whispered. And with that she broke. Her resolve crumbled and every emotion that had been locked behind her mask for so long flew into her tears. Slowly and carefully he drew her down to him, cradling her head on his chest their arms locked around one another as if afraid to let go. They clung to each other for neither wanted to think of what would lie ahead when the raindrops ceased to fall.
A/N please let me know what you think!!