I don't own these characters. Sunrise does.
This is a one-shot based on the Alicia Keys song "girlfriend."
They were on the phone… again. They had already spoken for about an hour, yet there did not seem to be an end in sight. Every now and then, she could hear a giggle from the other room. They're like little schoolgirls, she thought as an annoyed frown tugged at her twitching lip.
Natsuki was curled up on the sofa, the television watching her while she tried to ignore the noise in the other room. Her bare legs felt unusually cold, even though it was warm in the apartment. Her arms felt the same chill and seemed to try to compensate for another feeling by clutching onto a pillow as if it would ease the emotion that had her eavesdropping instead of watching TV.
She was just bothered by the amount of time they stayed on the phone, she guessed. She was bothered also by the fact that they had to talk on the phone every single night. Now, they had always been like that, but it bothered her now and she could not figure out why.
Okay, maybe it always bothered her, but now it got to the point that she had to recognize that it bugged her. Seriously, why the hell do they need to talk every freaking night? Why the hell do they need to talk every night for so long? It just was not right. They see each other every freaking day, so what the hell is there to talk about?
Natsuki's face tensed as she thought more about it and strained her ears as the conversation continued. The discussion was really too low for her to hear anything. After all, they had to talk in their perfectly polite tones, even to each other, even over the phone, even in the comforts of their own homes, even though they both knew neither of them really talked like that. Sometimes, Natsuki thought the whispering was done just so she would not hear what they were talking about. She tended to dismiss that, but right now she was too upset for it to be ruled out.
She heard that damned giggling again. What the hell is so freaking funny? Why does she always giggle so much when they talk to each other? She did not laugh that much when she was with Natsuki… unless of course she was laughing at Natsuki. The frown morphed into a scowl, cutting across her pale features like a laser scalpel.
The air around her seemed to grow heavy and dark as she strained her ears once more, hoping to pick up some kind of clue as to what they were going on about. She gripped the sofa cushion; if it were a living thing, she would have broken a bone thanks to her hold. She swallowed, hoping to ease the tension out of her throat; no such luck. All she did was hurt her throat.
"What the hell is wrong with me?" she asked herself, even though she knew just what was wrong with her. Knowing was not half the battle in her case. In fact, it was just adding to the battle, giving her something else to run around her mind a couple of million times.
She did not understand why she was so bothered by something she knew was not a big deal in the first place. She knew they were just friends and that was that. They had been friends for a while now, years actually, so she did not see why it just started to bother her. Okay, maybe it had not "just started" to bother her.
She supposed it had always bugged her a bit. The way that they sat together so contently, almost always smiling and exchanging little, subtle glances, got on her nerves. It was not that they were smiling at each other or anything in particular. They just sat there and smiled, almost as if it was a contest to see which one of them could pretend to be more polite and charming.
Then added to all of that was their strange habit of drinking tea no matter what the circumstances. They always sat calmly with a cup of tea, smiling, being phony together, and probably loving every second of it; why else would they do it they did not like it, after all? They were so much alike while she was so different from them. It seemed to her that they went together so much better than she did. Why were they just best friends then?
It made a kind of twisted sense to Natsuki that the best friends should be more than friends, or they were making their way to being more than friends. Sure, they acted the same as they always did, but it was still possible for them to end up more than friends. If that happened, she would end up alone… again. Of course, she did not want that.
Her stomach dropped as she considered being alone once more in her life. Her heart raced, thinking she would lose her most precious person again. Every god that could possibly exist would have to hate me for that to happen again, she considered. It would just be too cruel to be alone again.
She knew it was a silly thing to worry about. After all, she had been assured multiple times she would never be alone again. Yet, she worried because they were always on the phone, because they always had to have a few moments by themselves, and because they were so much alike that it really did not make sense to Natsuki as to why they were not dating already. How could they not be in love already considering everything?
Natsuki growled and tried to shake the thoughts away. She wished she could just stop thinking about it, about them, but they were still on the phone and it had already been an hour and a half. Her neck was stiff and hurting from the angle that she had it craned while trying to eavesdrop.
She silently reprimanded herself for her behavior, telling herself that she was going out of her mind. She tried to will herself to stop attempting to hear the conversation, swearing it was harmless talking, but she could not cease her actions. She bit her lip, pulled back a little, but ended up going right back into the same position as before.
Why am I acting like this? Natsuki sounded desperate in her own, which she knew could not be a good sign. She knew the answer, too. Plainly speaking, Natsuki was jealous. It was not the usual flimsy jealous that she typically felt either. That emotion was always easily remedied with an embrace or a simple kiss on the cheek or even sweet words. It would be chased away like a frightened mouse. This would not run so quickly, and even if it did, it returned full force soon enough.
This was a strong emotion that she was fairly certain was going to drive her insane. It just could not be healthy. She was jealous of Reito, Shizuru's best friend. How freaking dumb was that!
Before she could scold herself over being an idiot for the millionth time, she noticed the talking in the other room ended. She frantically tried to fix her position on the couch to avoid giving away what she had been doing, but Shizuru entered the room in the middle of that, so it looked like Natsuki was wrestling with an imaginary friend. Of course, this got a smile out of the older woman.
"Natsuki must be so bored without me to end up as she is," Shizuru remarked in a light, amused tone. She appreciated the sight before her, though. Her Natsuki was in her pajamas of very short shorts and a pink camisole, both of which were riding high because of all of the movement from the biker.
"Shizuru!" Natsuki sort of yelped (although she would deny it to her last breath) out as she sat straight up on the sofa. A jolt of pain shot from her neck and immediately she winced, closing one eye from the sudden pain.
"Is Natsuki okay?" Shizuru asked with concern in her voice as she fell to Natsuki's side.
"Yeah, I just hurt my neck," the younger woman replied in a dismissive tone, even though her face was still twisted in a slight grimace.
"Here, let me take care of that, Shizuru offered, purring as she spoke.
The ruby-eyed teenager proceeded to massage Natsuki's neck and shoulders. The biker wasted no time sighing in relief and smiling from contentment. Hard to believe that less than a minute ago, she had been burning with jealousy, but that would be back soon enough.
"You were on the phone for a while," Natsuki commented. She wished she could just let it go, but she needed to know that it was nothing. Even though I know it was nothing. Her brain might know it, but her heart… not so much.
"Ara, ara, I didn't even realize it. Reito-san and I have been working on a joint business project. It's nearly the end and we just want to make sure we have everything done properly for the best grade," Shizuru explained calmly.
That explains a lot, Natsuki thought. But, it did not explain why she had heard so much giggling. Why the hell did Shizuru giggle so much when she was on the phone with him? Natsuki did not ask. It was Shizuru's private, personal matter with her friend, after all.
"I forgot you two had a class together," Natsuki said while holding in a sigh that was brought on by her love's talented, gentle hands. She knew they saw each other at school, but them having a class together meant they saw each other fairly often for a long period of time, but it also meant they were doing something productive that did not necessarily involve an affair.
"Yes, we've figured that we'll try to take at least one class together each term to make the load easier. If only Natsuki would hurry to college so I could take classes with her. We could get good grades together. Perhaps the first Natsuki would see," Shizuru lightly teased, smiling as she spoke of course.
"My grades are good enough," Natsuki grumbled. It was hard to be properly indignant with Shizuru massaging her back.
"Good enough to make it out of high school, yes, but not good enough to get into some of the better colleges."
Natsuki groaned. "Not this speech again. I've been held back twice. I think that effectively ruined any chance I had at going to a good college. Besides, school is boring."
Shizuru chuckled, but she did not really share Natsuki's sentiments. Still, she supposed Natsuki was entitled to her opinion and she let her have that. She did not argue and continued working on her lover's stiff muscles.
"Natsuki is quite tense," Shizuru muttered in a soft voice, speaking into Natsuki's ear.
Shivers went down Natsuki's spine as she felt Shizuru's sweet breath on her skin. She gulped while trying to keep her composure. Butterflies suddenly appeared in her stomach and not for the usual reasons. She had to tell herself that Shizuru did not know what was wrong with her and she intended to keep it that way. She already knew it was stupid to be jealous and she did not want Shizuru laughing at her about it. She also just did not want Shizuru to know she could even think of something so ridiculous.
"I might have worked out too much today," Natsuki answered, figuring that would be a plausible response. She had worked out for a couple of hours while Shizuru spent time with Reito.
"Are you sure? I hope you didn't overdo it," Shizuru said in a quiet voice, as if speaking loudly would hurt her girlfriend even more.
"I don't think I did. And even if I did, it's okay since you rub my shoulders for me," the biker remarked with a joyous smile.
"I like rubbing my Natsuki," Shizuru retorted, mouth moving to the side of Natsuki's neck. Her lips were now dangerously close to pale flesh.
Natsuki just smiled and leaned more into the touch. Obviously, she liked it, too. As she sat there, just experiencing Shizuru's heavenly touch, thoughts of Reito invaded her mind again. She mostly told herself there was nothing to be jealous of. After all, she was willing to bet that he had not felt Shizuru's loving touch before. But – and she gulped at the thought – that did not mean that things would be like that forever.
What if Shizuru fell for him? What if she was already falling for him? Sure, she and Reito did not spend any more time together now than they did in high school. Their time on the phone had not increased either, but it was possible that Shizuru had already fallen for him and just had not realized it yet.
"You're getting even tenser, Natsuki," Shizuru noted. "You keep this up and I'll have to get the oil to give you a real deep tissue massage." She actually said it like it was meant to be a punishment.
Natsuki did not object, which was all Shizuru needed as an excuse to take off Natsuki's shirt and rub the biker down with sensual oils. Natsuki eventually relaxed and stopped thinking about everything. Shizuru was with her, after all. She was Shizuru's girlfriend while Reito was just her friend.
"Natsuki, I'm going to meet with Reito to finish up some work. See you in a little while," Shizuru said as she approached Natsuki, who was wrapped up in a video game.
Shizuru was careful not to mess up Natsuki's game, knowing the lecture and whining to come if she did would be more than she was willing to bear at the moment, as she leaned in for a goodbye kiss. She kissed Natsuki's cheek, which the biker leaned over for. It was only when Shizuru pulled away that Natsuki realized what was going on.
"You're meeting Reito again? That's like the third time this week!" Natsuki replied, keeping a complaining tone in check, but still sounding quite shocked. It was the third time and it was only Tuesday!
"I know," Shizuru stated with a slight shrug. "What does that have to do with anything?" she inquired curiously, head tilting to the side a bit as she spoke.
Good question, the younger woman's brain pointed out. What did it have to do with anything? Shizuru was allowed to have friends. Shizuru was allowed to hang out with her friends and Reito was her best friend.
"Um… nothing…" Natsuki replied, trying her best, and failing miserably, not to look anxious.
Shizuru thought that was odd, but she decided not to say anything about it just yet for right now. She left to go meet with Reito. Natsuki sighed as soon as Shizuru was gone.
"Why didn't she stay here with me? She's already seen Reito a bunch of times this week…" Natsuki grumbled while trying to pay attention to her game. Unfortunately, she still ended up seeing the words "game over" flashing through the screen and her mind stuck on the fact that her girlfriend was spending time with Reito again rather than staying with her.
Well, her brain decided to chime in, she had not done anything to make Shizuru stay. All she was doing was playing video games and being boring… by Shizuru standards anyway. She could have easily turned the game off and spent some time with Shizuru, not that Shizuru seemed to mind that she was playing the game. Shizuru did not seem to mind anything that she did, just like always.
Besides, she should not have to change her habits since Shizuru seemed to accept her as she was. Sure, she wanted to spend more time with Shizuru, but that was mainly because of her jealousy. She really just wanted to get Shizuru away from Reito, which she thought was totally wrong.
"Shizuru's allowed to have friends," Natsuki said to herself, but that did not ease the churning in her gut.
She groaned and rubbed the top of her head, mussing her own hair. She tossed the game controller aside and climbed to her feet. She scanned the apartment and found what she needed, her phone. She grabbed the phone and made a call.
"Is my Natsuki missing me already?" Shizuru hummed, her tone making it easy to guess that she was smiling.
"Uh…! Well… I guess…" Natsuki sort of admitted, scratching her cheek.
Shizuru chuckled a bit because she knew that her girl was blushing. "I've only been gone a few minutes. What will Natsuki do when I have night classes?"
Natsuki growled a bit as she started to feel even stupider than before for actually calling. Amazingly enough, feeling stupid and being teased did not halt her brain from continuing on with the half-baked plan that she had. Damn jealousy.
"Well… I was just thinking that maybe we could go to the movies or something…" Natsuki said, almost tripping over her words. It was the first lame thing that came to mind. Apparently, I'm not embarrassed enough, she thought.
"I would love to do that, Natsuki. How about after I meet with Reito?" Shizuru proposed.
"Uh… I guess…" Natsuki agreed. Damn it, she wanted to get Shizuru away from Reito!
"Wonderful!" Shizuru practically cheered. It had been such a long time since Natsuki took her out. Usually, she had to take Natsuki out or the younger woman would rot in the apartment in front of the television.
"Yeah…" Crap, now she would not be able to play her game and Shizuru was still going to see Reito. Damn it to hell!
"Shall I come back home for you then?" the older female suggested. She walked to her destination, but if she returned to the apartment when she was done, they would be able to take her car.
"Uh… no! I'll come pick you up," Natsuki replied as another idea came to mind. She had no doubt that it was just as stupid as the last idea she had, but she really did not care. Maybe if she showed up early, Shizuru would leave with her.
"Okay. I'll be at the little café that Mai works at."
"Gotcha. I'll find a movie for us to see and I'll let you know when it starts."
"Okay. See you later then. I love you."
"Love you, too. Bye."
Natsuki closed her phone and then dashed to the bathroom to take a quick shower. She then pretty much ran to the bedroom to get some clothes. She probably got dressed in record time as her brain led her to make what she knew to be another stupid move. She was going to arrive minutes from now, just to interrupt whatever Shizuru and Reito had going on. This is so stupid, but I want my girlfriend back.
On her way to the café, her conscience started to bother her. What right do I have to break up two friends hanging out? They were just friends, after all. She was so certain she did not have anything to be jealous of, but as usual, that thought did not stop the emotion for burning her up. That explained why she did not just turn around and just go back home.
Her conscience continued to bug her, though. So, by the time she made it to the restaurant, she was hesitant to go in and interject herself on Shizuru's time with her friend. She parked her bike across from the eatery, seeing Shizuru and Reito sitting by the window, smiling like they knew stuff no one else did and sipping tea as always. She hesitated on storming in and as Shizuru happened to glance out of the window, Natsuki dived into a nearby shrub.
"Could this get anymore demeaning?" Natsuki mumbled to herself with an ashamed frown and an almost tearful look in her eyes. Not only was she looking to keep her girlfriend from having friends, but she was also spying while hiding in a bush. If Shizuru found out, she would never hear the end of it. Hell, if ANYONE found out, she would never hear the end of it.
Natsuki watched the pair from the security of the lush plant. They did what they typically did when together, sipping tea, smiling their fake-yet-blinding smiles at nothing in particular, and talking quietly to each other, probably about school. Nothing new, so why did she still feel the same way? Jealous, yet relieved, but still jealous. It was so confusing!
The biker slapped herself in the forehead a few times, as if that would help clear her head. She wished she could figure something out, like how to feel one way or the other. She could not take having such torn emotions on the matter for too much longer.
"Natsuki?" a familiar voice called from behind Natsuki, making her jump in surprise and her face showed pure shock. She turned around sharply to see who was addressing.
"Mai?" Natsuki pouted. Well, it could have been worse; Nao could have found her finding in the bushes. Not only would she have had to deal with being made fun of for her strange predicament, but also all sorts of puns that would come about considering the fact that she was in a bush. "Eh… what are you doing here?" she ventured to ask, as if that would divert attention from the fact that she was crouched down in a damn shrub.
"I'm going to work. What're you doing here?" Mai inquired with an arched eyebrow. She just had to hear the story behind this one.
"I… well… I was…" Natsuki stammered and twiddled her fingers together. Damn it, she did not have a good cover story!
"Spying on Shizuru-san and Reito-kun?" Mai guessed as she focused ahead of them to see the pair enjoying their usual lunch and tea.
"It's not spying! And get down before they see you!" Natsuki replied while reaching up and snatching the redhead down to her level.
"And how is this not spying?" Mai asked in a curious tone.
"Because it's just not!" Natsuki insisted with a fierce expression on her face.
"Natsuki, what's the problem? I mean, I know you don't think they're out on a date since we both know they're best friends," Mai pointed out.
"I know, I know! But, for some reason… I don't even know! I just… I don't like that she spends so much time with him," Natsuki mumbled her confession while mussing her own hair again. She felt so stupid! Saying it out loud actually made her feel worse.
Mai looked thoughtful for a moment. "If you're so bothered by it, then why don't you say something to Shizuru-san?"
"Because she's allowed to have friends! This shouldn't bother me. They've been friends since longer than I've even known her! She can have friends."
Mai nodded, agreeing with that apparently. "But, this is clearly bothering you," she stated the obvious.
"I know, but it's my problem. She's allowed to have friends and I know he's her best friend. I'm just being stupid by being jealous of him," Natsuki muttered with a frown. God, she knew she was being stupid, but she could not stop being stupid.
"Well, hiding in the bushes and not talking about it isn't going to help," the busty female informed her good friend.
"I know," Natsuki groaned. She was not sure what would help.
"Besides, why are you jealous? It's not like he's going to steal her away," the redhead pointed out.
Natsuki nodded to that, knowing it to be the truth. Really, there was little chance of Reito stealing Shizuru away considering the fact that Shizuru was a lesbian, and quite proud of it. But, rational thinking just did not hold up against jealousy. In fact, rational thinking kept getting its ass kicked by jealousy in her head.
"They just spend so much time together…" Natsuki mumbled, speaking more to herself than her friend.
"You really should talk to her if it's bothering you this much," Mai advised in a gentle tone, hoping that would get her friend out of the bushes and on the road to a better relationship.
"She's allowed to have friends," Natsuki stated again. It felt like the millionth time that she said it that day alone. Maybe if she repeated it enough times, she would actually start to believe it, she considered. So far, it did not seem to be working out, though.
Mai shrugged; apparently, the biker was going to be stubborn and hardheaded like always. "Well, I've got to get to work."
"Don't tell Shizuru I'm out here," Natsuki ordered with a stern look in her eyes and a serious expression on her face.
Mai nodded and trotted off to work. Natsuki wondered if Mai would keep her promise not to say anything. Probably not, she thought. After all, Mai seemed concerned, which was probably justified considering the fact that Natsuki was hiding in a shrub, stalking her girlfriend. Still, Natsuki would prefer that her weirdness be overlooked for once.
The emerald-eyed biker was not sure how long she sat out there, lurking in a hedge plant, but after a while, she figured it was time to go and "pick up" Shizuru. She rose to her feet, having to stretch a few times, but that did nothing for her sore muscles. With luck, she could get a massage from Shizuru later to take the dull ache away. Although, she might ask why I'm so stiff and I don't want to lie. I'll have to think of something, which I'm not confident in right now considering how stupid I've been acting.
She stood up and walked over to the restaurant, not bothering to wave to Mai when she entered and saw the redhead. She went right to Shizuru, who still sat with Reito. As soon as Natsuki showed up, Reito excused himself, saying he had another appointment to get to.
"Sit down, Natsuki. Have something to eat with me," Shizuru requested in a soft tone that Natsuki seemed to have to obey considering the fact that she was in a seat as soon as her girlfriend finished speaking.
"Uh… don't you want to go to the movie?" Natsuki asked, sounding a bit puzzled. Shizuru had sounded quite happy with the idea, so she figured they should get to that. Damn, she did sound happy about the movies. Maybe I need to take her out more and then I won't think someone could steal her from me.
"Of course, I do. But, I want to have something to eat with my Natsuki, too. Is that so wrong?" the elegant brunette inquired while reaching over the table to take Natsuki's hand into hers. She was a bit surprised when the biker did not pull away, as Natsuki did have an aversion to any and all public displays of affection.
Natsuki shook her head. Of course, it was not wrong for her girlfriend to want to eat with her. In fact, it was just what she wanted. Well, it was what she thought she wanted. She wanted Shizuru to spend time with her, right? Or was it that she just did not want Shizuru to spend time with Reito? She was not sure anymore.
Natsuki ordered a burger, which Shizuru expected. She ordered some chicken and smiled all the way through the meal. It was not her usual hollow, directionless smile, but a genuine, small expression that happened to be directed at Natsuki. That put the biker at some ease because she knew Shizuru only looked at her that way. I get to see the real her, all of her. Even Reito doesn't get that.
The movie helped Natsuki's emotions smooth out even more. Shizuru held her hand through the whole thing. Natsuki was fine with the prolonged physical contact in public as long as it was dark and no one could see. She just had a thing against public displays and not just with her and Shizuru, but any couple at all. It was just plain rude in her opinion, especially when it went beyond handholding.
In the dark where no one could see, Natsuki had no problem with Shizuru holding her hand or leaning on her shoulder, as Shizuru did. As the movie progressed and boredom set in for both ladies, hands started to wander, and those hands were not pale ones either. Natsuki did not say anything, even as Shizuru started snuggling into her neck and kissing the pale skin. She thought she would have to open her mouth when busy hands got a little more personal and she felt more than lips pressing against her skin.
"Shizuru…" Natsuki whispered.
"Natsuki is so tense," Shizuru replied between kisses.
"Shizuru… you can't do things like this…" the biker muttered as she squirmed in her chair. Shizuru's hands were very personal now.
"Why not? I'm bored and this is very entertaining," the older girl commented, smirking as her fingertips glided against cool, smooth skin just below Natsuki's bellybutton. Even though Natsuki wore pants, those did not deter her from feeling any part of her lover that she wished.
"It's just not proper," Natsuki pointed out in a hiss.
"But, you're the only one I can be 'not proper' with. I like being 'not proper' with my Natsuki," Shizuru remarked.
Natsuki actually relaxed because of those words. She was the only one Shizuru could behave with in such a manner. Sure, she knew Shizuru spoke to Reito about her antics and she could show some of herself to him, but Reito never got to see "bad Shizuru" like she did. The comforting thought did not last long as she was bombarded with counters to it within seconds.
Sure, Reito did not get to see naughty Shizuru, but he knew of her existence. Shizuru spoke about things with Reito in regards to her thoughts and he was aware of what she was like underneath it all. There were no real secrets between the friends. Hell, Reito probably knew more about Shizuru than she did, Natsuki thought with dread. Does he get to see the real Shizuru and I just never realized it?
Tension rose, causing Shizuru's face to scrunch up in confusion. Why was her girlfriend getting more frustrated when she was being affectionate with her? It did not make any sense.
"Natsuki, let's go home," Shizuru suggested. Maybe there she would be able to calm Natsuki down.
"You don't want to see the end of the movie?" Natsuki asked as if she was in shock.
Shizuru laughed a bit. "I don't even know what's happening in the movie."
Natsuki conceded right then and there; really, she did not know what was going on in the movie either. They rose up from their chairs, Natsuki having to fix her clothing in the process, which included buttoning her pants, and they left the theater for home. Once there, Natsuki threw herself on the couch.
The raven-haired teen rubbed her head and tried to tell herself that she could not keep feeling the way that she did. She would worry herself sick if she did. There was nothing to be jealous of with Reito. He was just Shizuru's best friend. It was perfectly normal for Shizuru to have friends.
"Na-tsu-ki," Shizuru chirped as she sat down next to her girlfriend, curling into the younger female.
"Eh?" Natsuki turned to look at Shizuru and saw a strange glint in her rust-colored eyes. It was not the usual lustful expression that came when Shizuru hummed her name. It was something totally new.
"Should I give Natsuki a massage? She was so tense before," Shizuru offered in her usual light tone.
A massage would be nice, Natsuki thought. Her muscles would appreciate it. So, she lay down on the sofa, resting on her stomach. Shizuru immediately went to working on her stiff muscles.
"Oh, Natsuki, you're all knotted up. I think we're going to have to get serious," Shizuru commented.
Natsuki knew what "serious" meant. She did not protest, moving from the sofa to the floor. Shizuru went to get a few supplies, including a towel for Natsuki to rest on. Before lying down again, Natsuki started to take off her shirt, earning a whine from Shizuru.
"Natsuki!" Shizuru protested, sounding like a child that had been denied her favorite candy.
"What?" Natsuki asked and then she realized what she was doing. "Oh… sorry…" She blushed in embarrassment at her mistake.
Natsuki let her shirt go and Shizuru grinned. The tan-haired young woman quickly moved her hands to where Natsuki's had been. She then gently lifted the t-shirt off of Natsuki's frame, smiling all the way through. Once Natsuki was topless, she laid down on the towel and Shizuru started applying oils for a real massage.
"Natsuki is so tense. I wonder if it's because she spent all day sitting in a bush," Shizuru commented, which made Natsuki tense even more.
"Wha-wha-what're ya talking about?" Natsuki asked in a shaky voice. She made sure not to look at Shizuru, almost afraid the older female could read her mind.
"I'm talking about Natsuki sitting in a plant all day. Although, I suppose if you want to argue technicalities, it was just the afternoon." Shizuru spoke casually as she rubbed Natsuki down.
"I wasn't—" Natsuki cut herself off. She was not sure how to lie about what she had been doing. "Who told you?" she demanded with a frown.
"I saw you when you first arrived, but Mai did express some concern when she came in for work. Why were you hiding in the bush? Why didn't you just come in?"
"I… um… I didn't wanna interrupt your time with Reito…" Natsuki answered honestly. No use in lying to Shizuru, who could probably smell when she lied anyway.
"You wouldn't be interrupting my time. I love it when my Natsuki is around."
Natsuki nodded. "I know." And she did, but she was just crazy lately. "What else did Mai tell you?"
"She said that you're bothered by how much time I spend with Reito. Does it really bother you that much?" Shizuru asked curiously, eyebrow cocked high on her forehead.
Lie, Natsuki's brain ordered her. Lie like never before! Shizuru was allowed to have friends, after all.
"Uh…" Not lying fast enough! "Uh… no, it doesn't bother me…" Natsuki replied so lamely that she might as well have just told the truth.
"If it bothers Natsuki, she should have said something to me."
"Look, Shizuru, you're allowed to have friends and he's your best friend. I know you're going to spend time with him and everything. I'm just being stupid right now. Don't think anything of it," Natsuki practically pled. She knew it was nothing and she did not want Shizuru to compromise or lose her best friend just because Natsuki was being silly.
"I don't want you to be uncomfortable. If you're so bothered by my spending time with Reito—"
Natsuki turned enough to face Shizuru. "No! This is why I didn't tell you! I know you're going to say that you'll stop spending so much time with him and I don't want you to do that. He's your friend."
Shizuru's gaze was soft. "But, it makes you uncomfortable. I don't want you to feel that way. You don't have anything to be jealous of."
Sighing, Natsuki ducked her head for a second and then focused back on Shizuru. "I know I don't. That's the other thing. I know I don't have anything to be jealous of, but I still am. I mean, you guys are always talking on the phone, like everyday and sometimes for a really long time. Plus, you see him everyday and you guys just look happy together, like the perfect couple. And I know it's stupid to think, but sometimes I still think that you might be falling for him. It's so stupid, but my brain is just stupid I guess…" She laid back down for Shizuru, hoping this was the end of the matter.
"It's not stupid, Natsuki. I actually felt this way about Mai for a while," Shizuru confessed, going back to rubbing her Natsuki down.
"Wha?" Natsuki had to turn again after that admission. Why the hell would Shizuru be jealous of Mai?!
For a moment, ruby eyes glanced away and a small, almost sorrowful smile appeared on Shizuru's face. "I did. She seemed so close to you, even though I knew that your relationship with her was very different from your relationship with me, even when we were just friends. You two spent a great deal of time together. She was one of the few people that have your number and did call you. Eventually, I grew accustomed to it because like you said of me, you're allowed to have friends. It just took a while."
"So, I just need to give it time?" Natsuki asked, hope in her tone. She wanted to get used to it because she did not want Shizuru to give up an obviously satisfying friendship just because she was having trouble dealing with it.
"Well, that and I probably should ease up on the time I spend with Reito. I suppose that I have grown so accustomed to lamenting to him and now that I have nothing to lament, I've changed to sharing all of my happiness with him."
"What do you mean?"
"Reito was there for me as I first realized I loved you. He supported me through that. The harder I fell, the more he supported me. I feel as if I dumped so much on him and now I just share with him how happy I am to be with you, how happy I am that he helped me through everything to make it to the point that I am at."
"Oh… right…" Natsuki muttered. She forgot that Reito was the one that helped Shizuru through all of the heartache of being in love with a girl… a rather oblivious girl at that.
"But, you're right. I shouldn't spend so much time on the phone with him every night anymore. I do see him everyday. I should devote more time to my Natsuki, especially to help ease this feeling out of her," Shizuru said softly as her hands continued on deeply rubbing her girlfriend's back.
Natsuki wanted to argue, but really, she wanted help to stop feeling as she was. So, instead, she nodded. Shizuru leaned down and kissed Natsuki's ear, which got Natsuki to turn her head again. The two then shared a passionate, warm, and loving kiss that rid Natsuki of the jealous feeling for the moment.
Shizuru would work on getting rid of that feeling forever starting right now, though. She would show her Natsuki that they were meant to be and there was nothing for her to be jealous of. Natsuki would welcome it and they would come out stronger and better because of it.
Commercial break: this Lunatic has been published. Details are on my profile.