Buffy glanced at Angel. Angel glanced at the bed. Buffy glanced at the bed. Angel glanced at Buffy.
Buffy could swear that somewhere a clock was ticking and someone was laughing.
She glanced at Angel. He was studying the bed.
"You know," Buffy began, "those sheets aren't getting any whiter."
Angel glanced back at her.
She closed her mouth.
"How long have we been here?"
"About thirty seconds."
"Oh boy," Buffy muttered.
Serena rolled her eyes and glanced at the ticking clock on the wall in their fluffy white cloud. "This is boring," she complained. "Cut the crap and start with the lovey doveyness if you know what I mean, and I can't think how you wouldn't."
"You know, I read somewhere that in season six of Buffy there was a lot of…." Darien abruptly cut off as his Serena's head got a little bit bigger, a little bit redder, and smoke began pouring out of her ears. "I'm guessing it wasn't good sex."
"I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!!!!"
Darien looked at her, a disturbed expression appearing on his face. "Do you need some help, Dear? I think this is the first time you've EVER not wanted to talk about Buffy. And I mean EVER."
"DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!!!!"
"Geez, you don't have to get all red-faced about it."
Serena took a deep, shuddering breath. "You're okay. We're all okay. Everything is just *fine*. Fine."
"So everything is fine, then?"
"Wow," Buffy interjected, "this silence is really…comfortable."
"Really? I thought it was mildly strange…"
"Well of course it's strange!" Buffy burst out. "I mean we haven't seen each other in YEARS! Then they throw us together in this really, really small room with ONE bed. I thought this temptation would be GONE when you left. Hey, is that chocolate on the pillow?"
"Chocolate? I thought that they put mints on pillows these days."
"I kinda like chocolate."
"And peanut butter," said Angel softly.
"Oops," mumbled Serena.
Darien patted his stomach. "This conversation is making me kind of hungry."
"Darien," Serena smiled dangerously, "this is NOT the time for food."
A jar of peanut butter appeared next to the chocolate.
"Wow, that's amazing!" Buffy looked at the ceiling and screamed, "Can I have a million dollars?!!!"
"I think something strange is going on around here…"Angel glanced around suspiciously, at the bed in particular.
"Ya think? Give the man a million dollars!" quipped Buffy.
"Weren't you the one that wanted a million dollars?" Angel questioned.
"You know, you can be a real dumbass if you really put your mind to it."
"But I didn't put my mind to it!"
"Then I guess it's just a gift."
Angel looked a little hurt. "You can be a real bitch when you want to be."
Her mouth opened in indignation and she took a menacing step towards him. "Resorting to petty swears, would have thought you'd learn more in 250 years."
He glared at her and moved forward. "I've learned to keep my feelings in check."
"Oh, 'your feelings' in check! Impressive feat, Yoda!"
"At least I don't let them interfere with my work. I don't let them get me in trouble."
"I'm sorry if I have a heart! One that's beating!"
"Doesn't seem like you do from where I'm standing," Angel menaced, coming closer.
She fumed, balling her fists and taking a step closer.
They fell into each other's arms, kissing passionately.
"The BED!" Buffy squeaked out between kisses.
Serena looked on with wide eyes. "YES! YES! YES!"
"Um, honey, do you need a cold shower?"
"No, but I think Angel does. And it's about damn time that he didn't take it."
"Whatever you say honey."
They didn't make it to the bed. Instead, they hit the floor with a thump that neither of them noticed, seeing as they were otherwise occupied.
(ANYHOO. Buffy. Angel. Cut to two hours later. Blah, blah, blah.)
"Wow… that was…" Buffy trailed off, too beat to say anything.
Suddenly Buffy perked up. "Angel… you still have your soul."
Angel propped himself up on his elbow, tenderly pushing a lock of her hair behind her ear. "They must have done something… I don't believe it…"
Buffy grinned naughtily. "Wanna try it on the bed this time?"
(ANYWAY. Another two hour break. Hmmm. Maybe more like an hour and a half since they were a little tired after the other one. Hell, they're supernatural. Two and a half hours later…)
Buffy snuggled deeper against Angel's chest. "It would be okay with me if we never got back," she said with a yawn.
He pressed a kiss to the top of her forehead. "What does this mean?"
"NO!" Serena cried.
Darien sighed. "We've been here for over four hours. We've watched them do things I'm going to have nightmares about for the next 20 years. What is it NOW?"
"They're gonna have the 'What does this mean?' talk!"
"And that's bad… because…"
"Every time they do, it *never* goes well. Blah, blah, they love each other but it can't change anything… yadda, yadda, yadda. We *have* to stop it."
"Can't we just let fate take a hand in it, just this once?"
Serena whirled on him. "No! Because then Marti "the hellbitch" Noxon, will come prancing in, demanding for more Naked!Spike!"
Darien took her hand. "I'll tell you one thing, I must really love you to put up with all of this."
Serena looked like she wasn't quite sure how to respond.
"I mean, in the past few days I've been flashed to another world, almost attacked by a vampire, been yelled at, called a 'cartoon' whatever the hell that is, and I've spent the past few hours watching something very, very scary. So do you think that maybe we could just… have a few hours to ourselves?"
"Awww… that's sweet." Serena softened. "No."
Darien looked pained. "I had a feeling you were going to say that."
Doodle's notes: You guys'll just have to wait for the "talk". Too bad for you. If it makes you feel any better I don't know what's gonna happen either. Any which way we both get to wait. Muahahaha. Oh my turn to poke fun at my fellow author before I forget. The Buffy loving, pool swimming, Montreal visiting freak. I knew there was a reason we got along so well.
Goldy's Notes: Awww. Doodle is so sweet. *Gets a silly grin on her face* much like Buffy's when she saw Angel in 'End of Days.' *Sigh* And another Awww to go along with it.