HEY LOOK I'M NOT DEAD! I know that I have been away for ever but hopefully I'll be updating a lot faster now! Now on with the story!
Disclaimer; I own nothing!
A few minutes later found Ed and Riza walking through the front doors of central HQ. People whispered and stared at them as they passed in the halls making Ed feel thoroughly mortified. They reached their office and Riza walked in.
"Good afternoon everyone." she said crisply. Everyone in the office snapped to attention. They had expected her to be out all day with Edward.
"Hey Hawkeye, where's Ed?" Havoc asked. He hadn't seen the pipsqueak when the lieutenant walked in. Hawkeye looked around and then, not seeing Ed, walked out the door. The occupants heard a loud 'I don't wanna!' as Hawkeye pulled in a small figure with short blond hair and a little uniform. It took the subordinates a moment to realize that they were looking at the infamous Edward Elric. Breda began to crack up hysterically, Falman and Fury were trying to stifle giggles, and Havoc grinned before saying "aw, isn't that cute!"
Ed was not happy about that. He was about to beat the living snot out of them but then got a better idea. He turned around and looked at Riza with those puppy dog eyes he was getting so good at. He grabbed her uniform flaps, his eyes now brimming with tears. She looked down at him and frowned. She put a sympathetic arm around his shoulders and pulled him into a one armed hug, then she pulled out her gun and shot at each man within an inch of their head. They all looked at her with fear and shock.
"You should be ashamed of yourselves." Riza said angrily, "you're setting a terrible example. Just look what you did." she rubbed Ed's back reassuringly. The officers looked at the boy with his face buried in Hawkeye's side, his back shaking with silent tears.
Ed's back was really shaking with silent giggles. He hid his face so the others wouldn't see his wide grin. The looks in their faces when Riza shot at them were priceless. He had no idea that her motherly protection instincts for him would be so strong. Oh, he would have some fun with this.
"It's okay honey," Riza said, petting the back of Ed's head, "they won't bother you anymore." Ed looked up slowly with watery doe eyes.
"You promise?" he asked as innocently as he could. Riza nodded and patted his head kindly, then she gave the other soldiers a warning glare and walked over to her desk. Ed was about to follow her but was stopped by Havoc coming up behind him and clapping him on the shoulder.
"We didn't mean it kid, are we cool?" Havoc asked. Ed nodded "Good cause you look adorable in that uniform and I wouldn't want to be the one to put you off wearing it!" Havoc said with a laugh. Ed grimaced, why was it suddenly okay to call him cute and adorable and pick him up like a baby? He was 13 gosh darn it! He was a state alchemist! He deserved respect not babying!
Yet, deep inside, there was a part of him that kind of liked what was going on. A part that liked being treated like a kid for once and liked having parents that he didn't have to worry about and liked having a place to go home to every night and liked not having to travel. It was that part of him that made the rest of him feel weak. Some survivor he was , trying to replace the family and home he once had. It isn't like Roy and Riza really cared about him, once they got their own child they would forget all about him. He looked up to see Riza smiling down on him kindly and realized she would probably leave him just as his real mother had. He felt a burning of unbidden tears well up behind his eyes but he would not let them fall. He suddenly felt warmth as Riza wrapped her arms around his back and pulled him close. Her eyes gazed into his with a look of love and concern.
"Are you alright?" she asked softly, "You looked on the verge of tears there for a second." Ed cuddled closer and returned the hug.
"Yeah I'm fine, no problem." he said with a smile.
"Well if you say so. Why don't you go report to the colonel," she said still a bit worried, "He has something for you to do and I'm sure he will have something to say about your appearance." said with a smirk.
"Yeah, I bet." Ed said disdainfully. He walked over to Colonel Mustang's office then wretched open the door and slammed it behind him. He stood before the colonel's desk.
Said colonel had been daydreaming and had jumped at the sound of the slamming door. He looked up at the soldier in front of him. He had clean-cut short blond hair, gold eyes, and shoulder stars that showed he was a major. There was something familiar about him that Roy couldn't quite place.
"Hello major, is there something you needed to tell me?" the colonel asked.
"Yeah, Hawkeye said you had something you needed me to do." the soldier said. This perplexed Roy, he hadn't called for any soldiers all day.
" Well that can't be right," Roy told the confused soldier, "I have no idea who you are so how could I have called for you?" The soldier looked confused for a moment before smirking.
"What's the matter Roy, don't you recognize your own son?" the boy asked sarcastically. Then it clicked, this was Ed. This is what Riza meant when she said she was going to take him 'shopping'. Roy should have seen this coming, Riza had never really liked long hair on men and he knew it annoyed Riza that Ed had never worn a uniform. This was likely to happen when they adopted Ed. Roy just didn't think she would do it this soon.
Roy got up from his desk and slowly walked around Ed, observing his new look. The uniform fit him perfectly, not too long but just big enough so the cuffs on the sleeves wouldn't show his automail. The military blue complimented the color of his skin and contrasted his gold hair and eyes, making them seem to glow a bit. His hair was short but not too short and his spiky bangs, now shortened, brought out those shining eyes of his.
"Well I have to say Ed, you look positively cute with short hair." Roy said ruffling Ed's head, "and the uniform looks good on you so stop moping. Now it has come to my attention that you haven't handed in a report for your last mission."
"Come on Mustang!" Ed said indignantly, "I told you the mission was a complete flop, why do you need a report?!"
"Well I would be willing to do it for you for a price," Roy said with a sly smirk that Edward didn't like one bit, "if you are willing to start calling me daddy we might be able to work something out."
"NO WAY IN HECK MUSTANG!" Ed yelled angrily.
"You'll come around." Roy said smugly gathering some paper and a pen.
"Don't count on it." Ed said quietly as Roy handed him the writing supplies.
"Now I expect this to be finished by the time I come back from my lunch break understand young man?" Roy said crossing his arms and walking behind where Ed had taken a seat on the couch.
"Yeah, yeah whatever." Ed mumbled looking down at the blank paper. Roy smirked, he leaned down and placed a light kiss on the top of Ed's head before quickly exiting the room. Roy smiled when he heard flustered grumbles as he closed the door. He could just imagine the blush on Ed's face as he walked down the hall.
Roy went down the stairs to the break room where he was sure a war was about to break out. Because Riza had already chosen Gracia as Ed's godmother, that only left the position of Ed's godfather to be filled. Unfortunately just about everyone wanted the spot, Fuery, Falman, Breda, Havoc, and even Armstrong had already asked him about it. The only person who didn't seem to be bugging him about it was Hughes. Roy cautiously entered the break room to see all his subordinates gathered around Riza as she sat at the table reading a book.
"So who's it going to be Riza?" Havoc asked, bouncing on the balls of his feet.
"I have decided," Riza said as all the others in the room leaned forward in expectation, "that Roy will decide who the godfather his."
Before Roy could even comprehend what his wife had just said, the subordinates were gathered around him trying to get his attention. They were jumping at him and all talking over one another. Roy backed up to the wall as they gathered around him. He looked around for an escape but found none. He would have to pick someone if he wanted to get out of this. But who should it be? He couldn't pick between his subordinates! Then a solution appeared, Hughes walked through the door. Hughes of course, why hadn't he thought of it sooner! Hughes was great with kids and he had known Ed for years.
"Hughes is the godfather!" Roy said wrapping an arm around Hughes's shoulder. There was a collective sigh from the subordinates as they left the room disappointed.
"So now I'm Ed's god father?" Hughes asked. Roy nodded and Hughes's face broke into a huge grin.
"Oh Roy, I knew you'd pick me if I didn't bother you! This is so great now elysian someone to be her big brother! Oh no now I have to get started on making a photo album for him! There is no way I'm allowing my godson to grow up without photographic proof of his life! Just think of all the cute little outfits I can get him now! Oh this will be so wonderful!" Hughes cried excitedly. Roy had the feeling that he had just made a very bad mistake.
"Now where is the little guy?" Hughes asked. "I want to tell him the good news."
"He should be finishing up his report now." Roy said, "We should head back." with that everyone went back to the office.
They arrived just as Ed was exiting Roy's office. Hughes got one look at Ed and rushed forward. He swept the boy into his arms like a baby and twirled around.
"Oh Eddie-kins you look so adorable. O yes you do! Yes you do!" Hughes said in his baby talk voice. He nuzzled Ed's forehead and sprinkled his cheeks with kisses. Ed was definitely not used to being smothered by Hughes so he was understandably freaked out by this.
"Hughes what are you doing? Put me down!" Ed yelled, trying to get out of Hughes's grasp. Hughes just hugged harder.
"What am I doing? Why I'm just cuddling my new godson is all!" Hughes said squeezing Edward tightly. Ed was flabbergasted! Why would Roy and Riza do this to him? They knew how Hughes got! They were supposed to protect him! Ed glared heatedly at Roy over Hughes shoulder.
Roy was equally surprised at Hughes's antics. He didn't think he would freak out on Ed like he did on Elysia. With all the kissing and hugging and baby talk. It made Roy kind of angry that Hughes was doing that to his Ed without Roy's consent. Roy was supposed to be the father right!
"Look at you Eddie, you look so sweet!" Hughes said holding Ed at arms length, "Short hair really suits you and that uniform is just adorable! Oh but you know what would look even cuter? A little sailor suit! I saw one in the window of the shop where I buy all of Elysia's clothes, and it was just your size too! As soon as work is off you, Riza, and I are going to get you a new wardrobe! Won't that be fun?!"
Ed thought about just how much "fun" that would really be and immediately began to try and get out of Hughes's grasp.
"ROY, RIZA, HELP ME!" Ed called pathetically. Within a second, Hughes found himself with Riza's gun pressed threateningly into his temple.
"Maes," she said calmly, "give Edward to Roy. Now." Hughes slowly handed a very relieved Ed to Roy who softly cuddled him to his chest.
"It's okay Eddy, Daddy's got you." Roy cooed, surprising all in the room buy his tenderness. "I'm sure Uncle Hughes didn't mean to scare you." Edward was embarrassed at the public display of affection but he had to admit that he did feel calmer now that he was out of Hughes's smothering episode. It felt good to have a safe place for once, even if that place was that stupid colonel's arms.
As soon as Ed was done calming done he tuned into the ending of a conversation going on between Riza and Maes.
"So it's settled," Riza stated, "you will treat Edward as you normally do for the remainder of the day and then later tonight the three of us will go to the store you like and you can pick out three things for him."
"What about pictures?" Hughes asked in a stern yet hopeful tone.
"You may take as many as you want as long as you don't upset him." Riza said holding out her hand, "So do we have a deal?" Ed watched in horror as they shook hands, sealing his fate.
"Okay Ed," Hughes said in his normally manner, "Why don't you come down stairs with me? We just got a shipment of evidence confiscated from the laboratory of that crazed chimera maker in east city and Sheiska and I could use some help moving and cataloging it." Ed looked up at Roy questioningly. Roy smiled and placed the boy's feet on the ground. Ed smiled up at him and began to walk over to Hughes.
"Fine Hughes, but one more cuddle episode and I'm filing for a restraining order." Ed said. Hughes laughed and the two turned to leave.
People turned to stare at Ed in the hallway. More that once, a female officer came over to pat his head and tell him how cute he looked. Ed, of course, became exceedingly more annoyed and embarrassed by this, and by the time they reached Hughes's office he felt like crawling into a hole and disappearing.
Hughes's office was full of boxes. Sheiska was busily moving things around and filing things in large cabinets. She stopped as Hughes and Ed walked in.
"Oh hello sir," she said, "did you find someone to help me with this?"
"Right here!" He said excitedly, pushing Ed forward. Sheiska rushed over, dropping her box.
"Oh, who is this little cutie?!" She asked in a baby talk voice.
"WHO ARE YOU CALLING A MIDGET SO TINY THEY COULD GET STUCK IN AN ANT HILL?!" He shouted angrily. She immediately let him go.
"Oh my gosh, Edward is that you? What happened? Why are you so much more cuddly and adorably than normal?" she asked.
"I lost a bet with Mustang!" He said annoyed. Hughes tried to break up the tension in his normal way, by displaying pictures of his daughter.
"Oh don't you two be a couple of grumpy gooses. I know what will cheer you up, my darling daughter Elysia!" He said, producing about twelve pictures from his pocket. "There now isn't that better. Now the two of you get to work. This stuff won't file itself you know!"
He left and Sheiska and Edward began to catch up while working. Ed became so distracted that he didn't notice a stray beaker on the ground until he slipped on it and fell, dropping the box he was holding. The box was filled with bottles of cloroform which broke when the box hit the floor, spilling everywhere.
Ed fell into the puddle which soaked his skin and clothing with sweet smelling liquid. Ed began to flail about trying to get out of the mess, but every time he did he just slipped and fell again. By the third fall he was so drowsy that he collapsed into a deep sleep.
"Oh my gosh, Edward!" Sheiska cried, finally noticing that Ed was unconscious. Hughes hurried into the filing room at the sound of her cry. He saw Ed lying in the puddle on the ground and rushed to the sleeping boy's side. He pulled Ed into his lap and checked his pulse. He was fine except for the fact that he was asleep. His clothes were drenched in the sleep inducing chemical, Maes was getting sleepy just holding him.
"Sheiska, hold down the fort for me okay." Hughes said, Lifting Ed up and holding him bridal style. "I'm going to bring him upstairs to Colonel Mustang."
"Is he going to be okay?" she asked worriedly.
"He'll be fine, he's just going to sleep for awhile." Hughes said leaving the office cradling Ed in his arm.
Hughes burst into the office with the sleeping Ed. Riza looked up and jumped to her feet at the sight.
"Oh my goodness, Hughes what happened to Edward?!" she all but shrieked. She rushed over to Hughes and leaned over Edward, checking for injury. She wrinkled her nose when she smelled the cloroform and looked up at him accusingly.
"There was a little accident down stairs with some cloroform. Ed kinda fell into a big puddle of it and kinda sorta passed out." Hughes said defensively, knowing that if Riza thought he was an unfit baby-sitter he would never get that shopping trip with Edward, not to mention that he would look like Swiss cheese thanks to all the bullet holes Riza would put in his head for letting Ed get hurt.
"I couldn't stop him from slipping. Sheiska was watching him at the time." He explained. Riza stared at him analytically for a good few minutes before sighing.
"Well I guess as long as nobody got hurt you're off the hook Maes." she said finally. Hughes let out the breathed he'd been holding.
"Thank goodness," he said " for a second there I thought you wouldn't let me take him shopping."
"You can take him as long as Roy or I are with you." She said taking Edward from Hughes. Just then, Ed let out a little half sigh, half mewl and cuddled into Riza. Havoc squeed. (1)
Colonel Mustang, having been roused from his "paperwork"(aka mid day nap!) came out of his office to see what all the commotion was about. He saw Ed in Riza's arms and ran forward.
"What the hell happened?!" He yelled turning around and glaring at Hughes. Roy stalked forward toward Hughes. Hughes put his hands up defensively, he knew if he didn't come up with something fast he would be Bar-B-Que. Luckily Riza came to his rescue.
"Easy Honey, this wasn't Maes's fault." She said, placing a hand on his shoulder. "there was an accident with some cloroform, Ed's just sleeping." Roy looked at her, then the cowering Hughes, then at the sleeping Edward. He sighed.
"Alright people, damage control." He said in a commanding voice. "Hughes go clean up that spill, Riza go put Ed on my couch , the rest of you get back to work."
They all saluted and did as told. Roy headed back to his office with Riza at his heels. Roy went to his desk and started some papers. Riza removed Ed's blue coat, leaving him in a light black turtle neck, then laid him on the couch. She kissed his forehead then exited the office.
A few minutes later the door was opened by none other than the Furhur himself. Every one snapped to attention.
"Furhur sir, what do we owe the honor?" Riza asked.
"At ease," Bradley said. "I've actually come to speak to you Lieutenant. It has come to my attention that you and Colonel Mustang have adopted my dear little Fullmetal. Is this correct?" he asked.
"Yes it is sir." Riza said calmly, though on the inside she was nervous. If the Furhur didn't approve of the adoption he could take Ed away. She couldn't let that happen!
"Well there's only one thing to be done," the Furhur said, " Riza Mustang, I am gladly promoting you to the rank of Lieutenant Colonel."
"Thank you sir!" she said Breathlessly. "But may I ask why?'
"You have been deserving a promotion for a while now and the pay raise will help you support your new son." He said, "Plus now your son can't pull rank on you. Now if you don't mind, I need to go speak with your husband." He turned and opened the door to Mustang's office.
Roy was sitting at his desk, idly folding his paper work into airplanes when the Furhur walked in. He hastily stood up and saluted.
"Furhur sir," he said nervously, "what do I owe the pleasure?" The Furhur paid him no mind as he strode into the room and closed the door behind him. He walked over to the couch where Edward lay and smiled fondly.
"Children are amazing creatures wouldn't you say colonel?" he asked Roy as he stooped down to look into Ed's face.
"I Don't think I know what you mean sir." Roy said, eyeing the Furhur suspiciously. Bradley turned to him and smiled.
"I suppose you don't yet Roy," he said, picking Edward up into his arms and walking over to Roy's desk. "But with time you will. Fatherhood is a wonderful thing. And if there is one thing Fullmetal needs it is a father."
The Furhur placed the small alchemist in Mustang's arms and stepped back. Edward sighed contentedly and cuddled into Roy. Roy looked down at the boy in his arms and smiled lightly. The Furhur nodded his head and turned to go.
"Take the rest off the day off Colonel." he said walking out the door, "Oh and I will be telling your mother about your new little bundle of joy when I have tea with her on Sunday. Be looking forward to her call."
Mustang watched him go, he was not looking forward to that call. He had neglected to tell Lady Mustang about the bet and knew she would not be happy about being left out of the loop. Hopeful she would be merciful and not take it out on Ed.
He looked down at said alchemist in his arms. He smiled and hoisted him up so the boy was leaning over Roy's shoulder. Mustang headed out of his office and told Riza he would meet her at home. He then headed out the door, son snuggling into his shoulder.
1; lol squee-ing Havoc! I can't believe I wrote that!
That's all for now everyone! Please review!