Singing had always been my dream. To stand upon stage and sing a song with meaning. To sing something that would make people think about life, love, and, well, everything really. A song that would help change how people saw the world in which they lived. The words would flow gracefully and beautifully together.
"Hikari! Let's go!" Taichi, my brother, yelled from the front hallway, bringing me out of my daydream. Darn it. Grabbing my jacket, I slipped into it, covering my light pink long sleeve shirt. I wore a denuim skirt that reached a little above my knees and pink Ugg boots. I grabbed my MP3 and ran after Taichi, who smiled when he saw me coming. "Come on, don't want to keep everyone waiting, do we?"
I smiled at him and exited the door as he held it open for me. We were heading down to this concert that was being held at the school. It was a fund raiser thing that the school was doing, like a fair type of thing. The Teenage Wolves were playing, a new band formed by my brother's best friend, Ishida Yamato. We had to hurry because we were helping Yamato set up for this little concert and by the way he sounded on the phone when he talked to Taichi, he really needed our help.
"You seem really happy about the concert," Taichi laughed as he smiled down at me.
Of course I am! You know I love music! I signed to Taichi, who laughed even more at that. He did know I loved music, which was why I would go with him to Yamato's practices. To listen to the music. It was soothing to me and I greatly enjoyed music. I was bringing my MP3 so I could listen to it as we walked there. "One day I'm going to get you an iPod," Taichi often tells me, but I doubt that will happen anytime soon. My MP3 is old and can't hold that much music, only about a hundred or so songs, not enough for me. Taichi knows this and wants to get me something that can hold more music, but we just don't have the money for that. Not sense dad died.
"What are you listening too?" Taichi asked, noticing that I had one headphone in my ear, to listen to the music and my ear closest to Taichi was bare, so I could hear him.
Brother, My Brother, I answered. It was by Blessed Union of Souls, an American band that I fell in love with when I heard them while visiting Mimi in America. She sends me a lot of American music and bands, including posters and such, which I hang around my room. I don't know what I would do without Mimi, or Taichi for that matter.
"Is that this weeks favorite song?" Taichi asked, having to watching me as we walked, so he would see my answer.
No! Brother, My Brother is always a favorite! I signed, smiling wide. I seemed to always have a new favorite song each day but Brother, My Brother would always be a favorite, no matter what day of the year it was. I had many songs that were like that.
"Get in the car, Hikari," Taichi said as he unlocked it and went around to get in on his side. I slide in and buckled my seat belt, looking out the window. Taichi and I usually road in silence, him listening to his music over the radio and I put in my other headphone and listened to my music. It was something we just did naturally. We were close for siblings, Taichi now acting as man of the house because father passed away a summer ago. He was my father figure, brother, and friend. I could tell him anything and I know he would listen. Their was once a time when I could tell him, long ago. Now I have to sign it to him. I lost my voice when I was five to an illness that I couldn't beat. We have some home videos with my little voice speaking to someone, but other than that, my voice is never heard. I will never sing and I will never get my dream, but that doesn't stop me from writing songs.
Driving down the street is not exactly the quickest way to go, with the main streets being crowded, but the school is to far away to actually walk to. The light always seems to be red and even when it's green, the traffic is slow, which is why Taichi and I are taking back roads and such to get around. It is quicker, even though more turns are involved to avoid traffic. This is a game to Taichi and I. We try to see how many traffic jams we can avoid. If we get stuck in one, we have to start over. Neither of us really know how this start or even who started it, but we've been playing it forever, back when Taichi and I had to sit in the back seat while Mom and Dad drove around. Back when I could talk. It helped me learn how to count back then too.
I stared out the window at the passing cars and buildings. The people walking down the street were dressed formally, at least a majority of them anyway, all probable heading to or from a lunch break. Their wasn't that much to see in the city expect buildings, cars, and people. The occasional weed or two could be seen in the lesser parts of town growing out of the sidewalk and a flower or two could be kept in a window.
Taichi tapped my shoulder and I took out on headphone and looked at him, letting him know I was listening. "Did you grab your wallet?"
I nodded and pulled the wallet out of my jacket pocket, allowing Taichi to see for himself that I had my money. I also had a cell phone, but it didn't do me much use. Taichi and Mom could call him to tell me to do something, but I could never answer. I used it to text mostly, which was an easy way of communication. Anyway, when Taichi saw the wallet he nodded and turned his attention back to the road.
I guess the reason Taichi and I don't talk is because I can't. Taichi would have to watch me to see what I had to say in reply, in which case, he wouldn't be watching the road. Taichi could talk to me easily but I couldn't reply until we stopped somewhere or unless it was really quick, like a simple nod or something. I don't complain about being a mute, though... sometimes I wish I could speak. I often think of how wonderful it would be to have a conversation with Taichi, or Miyako, or Ken, Daisuke, Sora, Mimi, and everyone really. I wonder how my voice would sound, too. I wonder a lot of things when it's quiet. I've sometimes signed this thoughts to Mom, and she says that my thinking is beyond my years, but in all honesty, I've nothing to do but think to myself. I can't call up my friends and talk about the latest gossip. I can't go up and talk to other kids at school or introduce myself to new people. So what else have I to do but ponder things?
Taichi shook my shoulder to get my attention and I looked over to him. "Almost there." I didn't actually hear him say these words, with my music in and all, but I am pretty good at reading lips. Another thing I've learned in my moments of solitude and quiet.
I nodded. Alright, Taichi. So badly I wanted to actually say these words. Of course, no one knows of my want, my need, to actually speak. I don't exactly go around telling everyone. As far as everyone is concerned, I'm completely happy being a mute. This is true, I am happy, yet I have to wonder... My mind is wandering again and I find myself wondering what it would be like to own one of those voice activated journals. I would never know, because even if I did own one, how in the world would I actually get it to open?
"We're here," Taichi informed me, mostly not hear noise, the sound of a voice, because he wouldn't hear mine say it. I guess I'm starting to sound bitter about this whole mute thing, aren't I? I've grown used to it, I'll admit that much, but I still wonder, still dream. I'm not bitter about it, for it is no ones fault but my own, in a wierd way. My immune system wasn't strong enough to fight whatever it was I had, so long ago that I've forgotten. I'll need to ask Mom about that. Being mute makes me unique, as Takeru said.
Honestly, I haven't know Takeru all that long, only about six months. His older brother, Yamato, has become my brother's best friend in that amount of time, just as Takeru became my best friend. Takeru is still learning sign language, so we can talk back and forth, but most of the time I just listen to Takeru.
Alright, let's go! I can't wait for the concert! I smiled as I turned off my MP3 and pocketed it, along with my headphones. Getting out of the car, I locked my door and closed it, waiting for Taichi to haul his butt out of the car. It wasn't long afterwards that Taichi was standing next to me and we headed into the warmth of the school to help Yamato.
Hmm... a little thing that has been floating around in my mind. Tell me what ya think and weither or not I should continue.