Hello everyone. Seeing as how my moods have been swinging from one extreme to the other, I've decided to post the prologue for MFC, this way when I'm in an angst-y mood I can now be productive, seeing as how it's hard to write MEMF when I'm in one of those moods. This isn't going to be a funny story, and its mostly, angst and drama, hurt/comfort stuff. So this story is in Gray's POV. I hope this doesn't make anyone cry ;
Disclaimer: I don't own HM. The song is Feather Moon by Vienna Tang. I don't own that either.
My Favorite Color- Prologue
I stood at the peak of the mountain, my small puffs of icy breath barley visible in the night. Stars above me glistened like crystalline tears- the tears I would not shed. The snow was falling silently, it had been for hours. Some of the discarded snowflakes coated my shoulders, and when I turned my head I saw some of them fall from my hat bill. The chilling wind bit at my bare face, but I was completely numb to it - to anything.
I didn't like what I felt when I could feel- the hurt, the anger. It moved through me like a disease, spreading and consuming any good thing about me, leaving what was left of my hollow shell angry, empty, and lonely. Perhaps that was what I was most upset about. The loneliness, the thought of dying alone with no who needed me, no one who wanted me. The moon's light made the sky around it a deep violet purple and a glowing ice ring surrounding the whiteness of the moon.
Living clouds my blinded eye
Waters black, wood in snow
Dead of night, How bright you glow
If Mary didn't want me, who would? I had always thought that we were destined for each other. My frozen hands barely held two items as they violently shook, trying to circulate my blood throw my body. In one hand a piece of paper with a crummy poem:
Blissful Silence I thought
That's what will grant me access
To her heart- But I was
Blind- to her feelings
She Needed Me to
Speak out-to her
But I sat in my Corner
Everyday passing by,
Silent in hopes
She would see me.
Now He is her Voice
Hers- What I want to be…
I crumpled up the piece of paper and glared at the wadded up ball before tossing it down the mountain top. I wasn't hers and she wasn't mine. She had been stolen away like a priceless treasure in the night. Did you know that it takes less than half a season for an outsider to come in and destroy everything you've worked for for years?
Breath in, breath out
Exhale and inhale,
He rotted us from within as far as I was concerned. But then I have to wonder- was there really ever that? - an us? We certainly went to all the festivals together, but I suppose on her end it had been as friends. She couldn't have known about my feelings - she wasn't telepathic. But she wasn't completely oblivious either. I had given her my heart - wrapped up tight in a box and she'd thrown it down without even opening it. He had beaten me to her heart - he was her first love. I couldn't even have the satisfaction of knowing that I had beaten him to that - her first love, her first kiss.
God of stone
All is true down to the bone
He had it all, and I had nothing. I was nothing to her, nothing to anyone. No one wanted me, no one needed me. I could just follow my poem down the mountain and no one would really care. Sure they would mourn, but only for one day, then it would be like I never existed, like I didn't matter.
I held up my other hand towards the full moon, letting the light illuminate the small blue feather that I grasped. I gave a sad smile at the item of false hope, thinking that maybe if I turned around and ran back to her, if I gave it to her she would leave him for me. She would happily enter my arms and never leave. We would marry, have a family, and die old.
I love you endlessly
I laughed emptily as a strong gust of wind ripped the feather from my hand and sent it dancing around me, mocking me and everything that I thought that feather had stood for.
Not knowing why…
Mary didn't love me. She didn't need me when she had him…when she had Jack.
Breath in, breath out
Exhale and inhale
With that silent confession I turned to head down the mountain, wondering to myself - would anyone ever need me…could anyone ever love me.
Breath in, breath out
Exhale and inhale…