Title: The Sound of Two Heads Crashing

Pairing: MomoRyo. Also has some InuiKai, TezuFuji, and Golden Pair.

Disclaimer: I don't own own Prince of Tennis or its characters.

Summary: Momo and Echizen, two of the densest and most oblivious people Fuji had ever met. Sometimes he wanted to just smack their heads together and tell them to get a clue. None of his plans were working. What will it take to get them to notice their feelings for each other?


Prologue: A Tale of Two Idiots


It took Fuji longer than he liked to admit to notice it. But then he could be excused, couldn't he? He'd been younger then, less experienced and understandably much more naïve about such things. And Momo and Echizen had been mostly out of his social sphere for almost a year. He was excused.

But eventually he did notice it. It was so blatantly obvious when you knew where to look.

Momo entered high school when Fuji was a second year. His outgoing and cheerful personality was an automatic hit with his peers and his good looks got him a fair amount of attention from the freshman girls. It wasn't unusual for a girl, shy and stuttering, to come up to Momo and hand him a love letter written with painstaking care. But, sadly for the girls, Momo turned all of the offers down.

Why? people asked. You could have anyone, they told him.

He was too busy, he answered. He just didn't have the time for a girlfriend right then.

Or the more honest:

"I'm just not interested in them, Fuji-senpai."

Fuji had mulled over this answer for some time, his curiosity raised. There was something about it that seemed off somehow. Momo seemed like a nice, normal boy. And what kind of nice, normal boy couldn't find it in himself to be interested in a single girl? Especially when he had so many to chose from.

Maybe he was picky, Fuji thought.

But then another thought came and Fuji turned to the younger boy for the answer.

"Do you still see Echizen, Momo?"

Momo gave him a strange look at the question. "Of course."

"And has Echizen ever had a girlfriend?"

Momo snorted in laughter. "Echizen?" he said. "Echizen only knows the other half of the human race exists because they scream at him from the bleachers. And even then, that doesn't mean he knows what they're actually put on Earth for."

This had given Fuji much to think about and he started watching the two of them together when he could.

Echizen would regularly come to their tennis matches, something he and Momo had done together the previous year. Now he sat in the stands, sometimes alone, sometimes with his little group of friends (they couldn't really be called the freshman trio anymore). And he would come by the benches after the matches and he and Momo would talk and bicker and just generally act like a pair of cute little brats.

They were good together, Fuji decided and then firmly put the whole matter behind him, hoping something would come of it but moving on to his next curiosity.

But now it was a year and a half later. Echizen had joined their ranks in high school and his and Momo's relationship hadn't progressed in the least.

Fuji had been content to wait, to let their relationship grow into something on its own, but at this rate they'd finally notice their feelings only when it was too late. And Fuji was going away to college in a few months. He wanted to be able to move on peacefully, knowing that things with his friends were as they should be. Everyone else had already been paired up. It was just those two that held out.

And so started his plans. Fuji tried subtle at first, tried to gradually bring their minds over to his point of view with a few carefully placed veiled statements. All he got in return was a weird look from Echizen and the comment, "Fuji-senpai is weird today."

Momo hadn't even noticed.

So he tried harder, each attempt a little blunter than the last. Finally he was walking up to them and asking them, point-blank, their opinion on gay sex.

That time, both had looked at him, horrified. But then they had turned to each other, blushed, and quickly looked away.

So that was some success. Enough to know that his efforts weren't in vain, but it was still so little. He was afraid he was going to have to be a little more elaborate in his plans.

He really hadn't expected Momo and Echizen to be this dense.