AU

R&R


Last Love Song

If there is such thing as miracle... let me see it… please let me see it… please…

The sun that I thought wouldn't shine as remotely bright as before proved me otherwise as soon as I saw her serene, sleeping face by my side. Amidst the agonies and sufferings, in her outmost innocent form, from her steady breathing and soft murmuring down to her hands' gentle movement and eyes' slight twitching, I found ease and happiness all over again. In that morning, in that single moment, I found my heart's missing piece all over again.

"Haruka…" she muttered. Slowly she opened her eyes, and in her blue eyes that are as clear as the sky is at daylight, I saw my reflection. "Morning." she smiled. I cupped her cheeks and close the gap between us. The kiss is sweet, sublime but overwhelmingly powerful, surreal. The simple brushing of my lips with hers filled the gap left a year ago, leaving me complete all over again. I kept my eyes open during the kiss and it stayed that way till we parted. "Are you crying?" she asked me so worriedly.

I laughed softly and wiped my tears. "I'm sorry Michiru… I'm sorry… I just… missed you."

"Silly, Ruka. Why are you apologizing for? Beside it's not like you haven't seen me for a long time." She giggles and playfully ruffles my hair. I gently took hold of her hand and looked directly in her eyes.

"Don't leave my side, Michi." I told her. I felt my voice trembling. Her face softens and I could feel my tears welling up. I turned away but her soft palms cupped both my cheeks, moving my head to face her.

"Never. I promise." She said as honest and as sincere as she could ever be, sealing her words with another kiss.

"I want to spend this day with you…" I spoke as soon as we parted. "This day… all day… I want to spend it with you…" she smiled

"You have work today, Ruka."

"Work can wait." But this will never happen… again… "I want to spend this day with you."

She smiled again, much warmer than before and much more painful than it ever was… an unexplainable feeling… the feeling of missing and losing a lot… "Let's make this day far more memorable than the rest!"

Help… Please do so… let me forget the past… conceal this feeling of regret…Michiru... help me…

We went out of the apartment and walked our way out to the street outside.

I held Michiru's hand as gentle but firmly in own. I held her like I never held her hand before. I held her like I won't ever let go of her. I held her like she was a part of my own body… afraid of letting go… afraid of losing her… These uneasy feelings; worries of what might happen when I close my eyes or held her too loosely, so, I pulled her closer to me... feeling her warm body close to mine, I will be aware when she's gone.

"Haruka..." her soft worried voice penetrated my ears. I looked at her and her eyes were gleaming with concerns. "Daijobu?"

"Hai." I flashed a reassuring smile to her. She seemed convince as she smiled back at me. She pulled my hand and continued to drag me along the narrow gap between bodies ahead of us.

We stopped by at a restaurant Michiru has been ranting about ever since.

I watched her as she eats her food and expresses emotions of astonishment as she does. The simple movement of her lips as she pouts smiles and gasps; her eyes as it glitters with happiness, excitement and love; I found myself smiling and feeling satisfied but the anxiety I feel is unrelenting.

And yet she kept smiling, no worries nor troubles enveloping her heart. When have I seen her smile like this? When was the last time I saw her smile? When was the last time?

x-flashback-x

(a year before)

"You promised me!"

"I did. And I'm sorry. But it can't be helped."

"Don't go on and make promises you can't keep!"

"It's not like I have a choice!"

"You have!" Michiru shouted. She grabbed her purse from the table and started walking towards the door. Haruka ran after her and grabbed her arm "Don't touch me!" Michiru flinched.

"What do you want from me?!"

"I want you to consider my feelings!"

"I did. I already told you I'm sorry. Isn't that enough?!"

"It isn't."

"You talk so highly about considering your feelings when you haven't even considered mine?!"

Michiru groaned "I hate you!"and started walking away.

"I hate you more!" returned Haruka but Michiru was too far away to hear her.

x-end of flashback-x

That day we had a fight. It started out as some petty fight that turned out of control that we began shouting at each other. We were so young, so foolish, so immature.. we ended up saying words at each other we never meant... That day… I started regretting that day ever since then… till now…

"Haruka…" she called out. I snapped from my reverie and looked at her.

"Hmmm?"

"I want to watch the cherry blossoms."

And we did. We walked to the outskirt park in this rural area we live in and settled to one place. The bench under a full bloom cherry blossom tree is where we took our sit. We watched the other cherry blossom tree around as blooms and its petals falling as the wind rustles through it.

I watched her again as she breathed in the smell of spring in her lungs and exhaled with a content smile on her face. She then looks at me and moved her head forward. I leaned in and captured her lips with mine. The sweet; sublime taste of her lips is still the same. And I still had my eyes open during the kiss. This is real, isn't it? Michiru in front of me is real, right? This doubt.. this uneasy feeling started feeling my mind and my heart... That this Michiru; this kiss and this feeling is all real and is all happening right now.. but if this isn't... God... please prove me wrong...

"Haruka…" she spoke as soon as we parted. I didn't even notice that we did until I saw her face a few inches away from me. She continued. "You had your eyes open." She mused. "Why?"

"I don't want to forget." I said with such honesty in my voice and in my words. I want to see you with each passing second…

"Silly..." she giggles, a bit half heartedly.

"Michiru…" I called out softly. "Do you remember my promise?"

"Hai."

x-flashback-x

(A year before)

"I'm going to be the first person to hear Ruka's first composition. First one, okay?" Michiru said sternly.

Haruka whined. "But Fukuda-san wanted me to sing it in his shop for the customers to hear."

"When is it?"

"The 5th of March"

"Then hold it till my birthday. Just sing any song on the 5th then sing what you composed to me on my birthday!" Michiru beamed "As my birthday present, Ruka!"

"Birthday gift?"

"Hai! So promise me then. Sing for me in my birthday." Michiru demanded but calmly, raising her pinky finger up.

Haruka sighed then smiled. "Your birthday gift. I Promise." Intertwining her own finger with Michiru's.

x-end of flashback-x

Michiru sat on the edge of the bed as soon as we walked back home. Crossing her legs, she then placed her arm over her knees and leaned her cheek on top of her palm and watched me as I grabbed my guitar up from its stand.

I grabbed a chair and placed it in front of Michiru. I took my sit, placing the guitar up front my stomach, my lap supporting the guitar's weight. Breathing deeply in and out, I looked Michiru straight in the eyes and started strumming the string a bit slowly and gently. I opened my mouth and I began singing the song I wrote for her.

It feels like a lifetime,
A thousand days have passed by
Since I held you close to me
If I could see that smile from my friend
I know that I could live again
I need you here with me

Heaven knows what to say
Even though for right now
you're so far away
I hope and I pray
Somewhere in your heart I'll always stay
Girl, lately
my sun doesn't shine without you
Never noticed
what it feels like to be without you
Feels like I took my last step
And my last breath and my life ended
Had to say just what I was feeling, girl
'Cause my sun doesn't shine,
Sun doesn't shine without you

This is more for me than for you
Girl, I finally see there's no substitute
For what we have
Do you know how much I love you?
And what we've shared
I can't forget
Girl, a love like yours
I'll never let just slip away
Just promise me that you'll stay

Heaven knows what to say
Even though for right now you're so far away
Gonna tell you and show you
Do whatever I can do to get back to you
Girl, lately
my sun doesn't shine without you
Never noticed
what it feels like to be without you
Feels like I took my last step
And my last breath in my life ending
Had to say just what I was feeling, girl
'Cause my sun doesn't shine,
Sun doesn't shine...

Have you ever seen a flower that never blooms
See a starless night without the moon
Well that's me without you
So come back and turn my night into day...
...cause lately,
my sun doesn't shine without you...

'Cause my sun doesn't shine,
Sun doesn't shine without
you

Slowly and softly, I had stopped from playing the guitar. Michiru looked at me tenderly and I wonder if those blue eyes of hers would even shed a tear.

"It's great. It's really beautiful. It really is…"

"Being unable to sing this song to you on your birthday is what I regretted the most…" I said placing the guitar back on its proper place. "Michiru… Why did you leave that night?"

She looked at me; her eyes were in full shock. I continued "Why did you have to die?"

x-flashback-x

(A year before)

"Haruka…" a voice from the other line spoke up.

"Sets... Is Michiru there with you?"

"I'm in the hospital right now…" Setsuna's voice sounded down. Her voice began to tremble as she continued. "Haruka.. Michiru is… Michiru…" and before Setsuna could even finish, Haruka clearly understood everything. She hung up and started running to the hospital.

As soon as the blonde entered the hospital, she recklessly made her way to the counter and demanded for Michiru's whereabouts, screaming and causing a commotion. The only person who stopped her at that time was Seiya, Haruka's best friend and Setsuna's boyfriend. He took hold of Haruka and calmed her down.

"Where is she? Tell me she's okay… please tell me…" Haruka cried helplessly unto Seiya's chest as she clings for the boy's shoulder for support.

"Haruka... Michiru got into an accident. She got hit by a car and… Michiru is..."

"Please take me to her… please..." and as helpless as Haruka is, Seiya, brought by feelings of sadness and sympathy, brought her friend to her lover, Michiru.

Haruka stared at her lover's blood covered body in disbelief. She walked slowly towards Michiru and starts shaking her up. "Wake up Michi. We haven't gone to see the cherry blossoms yet." Tears crawling down her cheeks. "Come on, wake up... You haven't heard my song yet... I don't hate you, so please wake up... Wake up, Michiru... scream and hit me... tell me that i'm being stubborn... Wake up... open your eyes.. please..." Setsuna tried to walk closer to her friend but Seiya stopped Setsuna in doing so. "I love you. So please wake up and smile one more time… I love you... come back to me… please... Michiru!" Haruka finally cried out loud as she embraced Michiru's body.

x-end of flashback-x

"Why? Why does it have to be you?" I asked in a demanding tone, feeling as helpless as I was before. Ever since then, My wish had been the same… To see you again... I don't care in what way, when, where or in what form... I just want to see you, to hold you, Michiru… All this time, I've been asking God to show me miracle… even for just once… for this one moment with you again… When i opened my eyes this morning and saw you sleeping by my side, I couldn't be happier but.. my regrets... "I love you. And I'm sorry. If I hadn't been stubborn, you'd still be here with me right? You'd still be living and you'd still be smiling. Michiru... I'm sorry.. sorry.. sorry.." then it happened, no more holding back of tears, I started crying, my body trembling from this overwhelming emotion. A sudden warmth was felt on my cheeks. I look at her and she was looking compassionately at me… her eyes full of love that she has for me.

"Haruka, stop crying." She spoke mildly with the same smile I used to remember. "I'm okay. This isn't any of your faults. So don't hold any grudges against yourself." Wiping the tears on my cheeks with her thumb, she continued "I love you, and you love me. And because of that, I'm still alive inside your heart and I could smile just by knowing that."

"Michiru…"

"Kiss me for one last time…"

I leaned in to capture her lips but she backed away "But this time, close your eyes."

"I want to remember."

"Remember with your heart, not with your eyes. The feelings felt will be the most powerful than anything you would ever see. So close your eyes and let me be felt." Raising her hand up and closing my eyes wither her fingers, we finally kissed for one last time.

And then, Michiru disappeared. I was back to the same life without Michiru by my side. But this time, I am living a life with no regrets. And knowing that Michiru is watching over me, is enough for me to live my life happily and with content.

As the season of your birth comes, I'll sing my last love song for you...

Praying that it reaches you in the heavens above

and hoping that somehow you are singing along with me

Michiru…

Soon…

In the afterlife I will greet my love again...

A/N: end!! thanks for reading.. as seen, pretty much written in a rush(evident on how fast the pacing of the story is).. yoI just had to try and make a tragic sort of story.. If there's any mistake(w/c I'm sure of) please do inform me. thanks..

Reviews are welcomed..

Try to read my recent updated stories: Seasons of Love and My Stepmother. lol

Song changed. The song is by the way "Without You" from a local artist here in my country.