I'd like to dedicate this fic to my friend 'Query' who passed away on the 22nd of this month. She was a huge Riddler fan. Check out her fanfics here under the username 'Query'. She will be much missed by all who knew and loved her.


The Riddler turned his head to one side and looked at the word combination on the Scrabble board.
"Rabies Ring Loom?" He said out-loud and frowned curiously at Joker, who grinned winningly back. Then, with a look of realisation, Riddler exclaimed:
"I'm a boring loser!"

The Scarecrow snorted from behind a newspaper and Scarface looked away from the television with a grin.
"Ya don't need to tell us, Eddie!"

Riddler glared at Joker, who sat back in his chair, arms behind his head. "Very cute." Riddler said dryly and Joker laughed.
"What can I say, Eddie, you bring out the cutie in me!"

Harley Quinn was crawling on all fours across the carpet, a look of anticipatory eagerness on her face.
"Sneak, sneak, sneak," Harley whispered to herself, blue eyes round and pigtails bobbing. She reached the chair where the lanky professor sat, entirely concealed behind his newspaper except for his long, spoke-like arms and legs, and readied to pounce.
"BOO!" She screeched, leaping up.
Scarecrow did nothing more than turn another page of his paper.
"Aw, yer no fun." Harley sulked, crossing her arms and pouting.
"You cannot scare the Master of Fear, child." Crane retorted calmly.

Poison Ivy turned away from the window where she'd been watching rain patter amongst the trees and slunk over to the couch. She seized the remote and changed the channel. James Cagney's black and white face turned into a vivid technicolour bush of roses in full bloom.
"Hey ya dumb groad, I was watchin' that!" Scarface yelled. Ivy pressed her lips together and watched the screen intently.
"Ya listenin' to me!" Scarface continued as the Ventriloquist urged him to hush. "Shut up, ya dummy, I'm talkin' to the weed! Got some nerve, ya floozy!"
"Sorry Arnold," Ivy drawled, eyes fixed on the screen. "I don't talk to inanimate objects."

"Gee, Pam, I thought you liked spending quality time with a hunka wood!" Joker piped up and Ivy slumped down further on the couch, a scowl marring her pretty features.

"That's impossible. I can't believe it." Two-Face growled as he hit the ping-pong ball back to the Mad Hatter.
Hatter chortled: "I daresay you haven't had much practice. Why sometimes I believe as many as six impossible things before breakfast!"
Two-Face hit the ball so it flew off the table. Hatter squeaked and scurried off after it. Two-Face got out his coin and flipped it.
Unscarred side up. Again. He was stuck here for another game. And another conversation with the Hatter.
The Hatter returned, holding aloft the ball triumphantly. "Frabjous day, caloo, caleigh!" He crowed, hitting the ball.
Two-Face sighed and half-heartedly returned it.
Hatter leapt to it. "Twinkle, twinkle little bat!" He exclaimed excitedly.

"Bat?" Two-Face missed the ball.
"Bat?" Scarecrow looked over his newspaper.
"Bat?" Harley peeked over the back of the couch as Ivy raised an eyebrow.
"Gat?" Scarface stopped slapping the Ventriloquist.
"I wear tight spandex!" The Riddler cried as The Joker cackled. "That was one time!"