I was worried about him. He seemed so sad the last few days. So depressed.
I know he wouldn't want to talk, but we had the night off tonight, since the Night Class was out of town this weekend. We hadn't had a day off in a while, finally a night to get some sleep. But I was worried.
I was walking through the hallway of his dorm. I reached his door, and pressed my body up against it, listened to see if he was asleep.
At first I heard nothing. I almost didn't want to hear anything. I had convinced myself to walk away. But then, I heard a sob.
It scared me, immediately thinking it came from some other place then Zero's room. It didn't. I went back to his door, and sure enough I heard tears. Could he possibly be crying?
Just the thought of it made me sick. I couldn't imagine Zero bawling his eyes out, alone.
I walked up, close to the door.
"Zero?" I found myself ask out loud. No answer. I repeated myself a bit louder, and turned the knob of his door. Very slowly.
I peeked through the door, and saw him lying in his bed, sobbing as silently as he could.
He didn't realize I was there, but I couldn't keep myself a secret. I quickly jerked open the door, and slammed it closed finding me standing inside his dorm. He sat up, surprised to see me. Immediately wiping his tears away as if they were never there. He looked at me, trying to keep a straight face.
But his eyes. His eyes were about to fall into pieces, and when that happened, he wouldn't be able to hold them back.
I didn't think, I just ran towards him. Jumped next to him on his bed sitting cross-legged. I pulled him close to me, surprised he didn't refuse.
Neither did he say a word.
"Zero..." I whispered. I had nothing else to say. After a moment, I felt him relax, as he let more of his weight lean on me. I hugged him tight.
And he began to cry. Really hard. And loud, too. He cried and I squeezed him close to my heart. I was somewhat glad he was crying. I don't remember ever seeing him cry, or at least never this hard. I think much of the pain he has been suffering, it only makes it worse by not crying. By not letting anything out. By not showing his feelings, and keeping it all in. So I was happy.
I rested my chin on his head as he cried. We sat there for no more then 10 minutes, in that position, him crying, his tears dripping onto my hands, before he soon calmed down.
His tears kept falling, but he grew silent...
My eyes moved over to his clock next to his bed. 12:30 am.
I waited about five minutes before the thought grew in my head. Could he possibly be falling asleep?
If that was true, I would stay there all night if I had too. He hadn't gotten a full night's sleep in who knows how long. And if it made him feel just a bit better, I would let him sleep.
I continued to squeeze him, as his breath gently touched my arm.
I smiled and stroked his hair with my free hand. I touched his last tear from his face, whipping it away.
Zero. It seemed the only thing I could do for him now was let him sleep.
And, hug him of course.