Title: In Search of Sara, My Friend

Author: Nicksfriend


Spoilers: Good-bye and Good Luck

Disclaimer: They do not belong to me...that is for sure.

Author's note:This is my fourth CSI fic.

Walking of the cubicle door she felt as if she would faint, she had just lied to her best friend,that is why she left, he would have figured it out. Nick would have put the puzzle together, realizing that the baby was not Grissom's.

She went to the desk, knowing that George was waiting for her in the ICU waiting area, she needed to do one thing, she needed to leave Nick a note,she had to tell him the truth and ask him to leave and never look for her again, it would be the best thing for her and her baby.

Walking back to the nurse's station she asked for a piece of paper and she took out her pen, her hands shaking uncontrollably she wrote:

My Dearest friend Nick

I need you to go home. Always remember our friendship and how much I it meant to me but you know that I need to move on with my life. I have things that I want to get done and that includes teaching and establishing a closer relationship with my mother. Finally being the person I always wanted to be but was afraid to be.

Please allow our friends to help you through this difficult time,they really care about you and what happens to you, I know, I was there when you went missing, buried alive, left to die. We all wanted what was best for you but we saw how you suffered and how you changed afterwards. They love you Nick, as much as I love you. Let them help you, allow them to be there for you.

Nick, I lied to you and I am ashamed that I did but the truth is that the baby is not Grissom's. I lied because I did not want you to think bad of me, to think I was someone who was capable of breaking one man's heart for another.

Remember, I will always love you as a brother. You were/are my best friend. Help Grissom by being there for him, allowing him to grieve my absence. You are the only one I can count on to do that, because the one truth I absolutely know is that you have the heart of a saint and the strength of a giant.

You will always be my hero.



P.S. I will never tell you good-bye, because Good-bye is forever and I plan on us seeing each other again someday.

She folded the paper carefully and handed it to the nurse,"Please give this Mr Stokes after I leave."

The nurse smiled and took the paper and pointed towards Nick's cubicle, "The doctor just went in to remove his tube."

"I need to leave, tell the other CSI, George Meads that I had to leave, tell him I took a cab." She looked around, "Is that the back elevator out?"

"Yeah, it is a direct connection to the emergency room."The nurse started walking towards Nick's cubicle but turned to speak to a fleeing Sara ,"Is there anything else I should tell him?"

"Tell him not to tell Grissom that he saw me." the sad look on her face evident to the nurse.

"Okay."Nodding confirmation that she would tell her friend, confused as to who she was talking about.

Sara went to the elevator and punched the number. When she entered she could no longer hold back the tears,she really missed her friends but she had to let them go,they would never understand.


Warrick and Grissom stood patiently in the ICU waiting area to see if the John Doe was their friend, a few others families were awaiting news on their loved ones too.

Nick's nurse came back to announce that they could visit and they had a positive identification made, the John Doe was actually was Nick Stokes.

A look of total relief crossed their faces and they quickly stood to walk into the ICU area, afraid to see what condition they might find Nick in knowing that he had been shot.

She waited until they left and motioned for George,"You partner left. She said that she was going to take a cab back."

George felt confused as to his partner's actions but he knew that she was emotionally involved with the man in the ICU bed, maybe it was very upsetting for her to see him, anyways he needed to get back to the lab with the evidence. He thanked the nurse and headed out to his car.


Nick had just finished reading the letter, tears still evident on his face, she had moved on with her life, she was well and she was pregnant. He had to let her go, she had moved on with her life and she was not ready to allow anybody back in at this time,the father of her baby was only her business.

Nick was about to close his eyes, the nurse had just given him something for pain, He slid the letter underneath his pillow,and tried to relax. He would call Grissom when he awakened.

"You are such a bum." the familiar voice of Warrick Brown resounded above him.

His eyes flew open to see his boss and Warrick standing beside his bed."How?" his voice cracking due to the tortuous tube he had just gotten ridden of just minutes before.

"Well, let's just say,we followed the evidence." Grisson flatly replied.

Nick nodded his head, his hand reaching under the pillow to make sure the letter was still there. "My vehicle." he grinned, the pain in leg easing up just a little bit.

"Yeah, we're just good, John Doe." Warrick emphasizing the new given name, making fun of the fact that he was actually a John Doe.

"I kinda like the name myself,it is more like me, humble." he smiled at his friend.

"Nick Stokes humble. Right." He paused and looked down at Nick's swollen and wrapped leg,"That looks as if it might hurt a little bit." Pointing to his leg.

"The pain med is helping. When can I go home?" He asked to Grissom's and Warrick's surprise.

"You just got here last night. Did you find what you were looking for already?" Grissom asked, wondering why he had changed his plans.

"I think I found what I was looking for ." Nick responded. "As soon as they will allow me to leave,I want to go home."

"I will drive your car back, as soon as they process it. I like a good road trip." Warrick volunteered.

Grissom was suspicious of Nick's change of heart, it could have been the robbery but he had a gut feeling that it was more than getting shot.

The nurse walked back into the room,"Hey, you are doing great. We are going to move you to a private room. You should be going to rehab then home soon."

"Can I do rehab when I return home, I really want to go home." Nick practically was begging.

"I am sure the doctors could answer that question better than I. I guess that depends on how well you do here in the next couple of days." The nurse continued.

"I just want to go home." his words fading as the pain med gripped him and pulled him under.

Warrick and Grissom looked at each other in confusion. Why was Nick suddenly in such a hurry to leave, it could be the trauma from being shot. They both shook their heads and left to wait until Nick was moved to a private room.


He had been moved to a private room, the letter was tucked away in his new duffel bag that Warrick had purchased along with underwear,socks, a t-shirt which advertised the use of safe sex, Warrick's humor of course and a new pair of jeans and a pair of fluffy slippers. Warrick would pay as soon as he could manage a standing position.

Lawson had come by that evening and got his statement, telling him that he would not need to come back to testify but would have to go through standard procedures to get his weapon back.

Now he was lying quietly in bed, Warrick had taken his car back to Las Vegas after promising to make no side trips to any of the local bars.

Grissom would be back to assist him to the plane in the morning, he would be flying to Las Vegas and transported to Desert Palms from there, per Grissom's orders.

He pulled out the letter again and started to read it to himself. He would miss his friend, she was a part of him regardless of the distance. She had secrets to keep and he would help her, he would be there for Grissom. He would be there for their friend. He folded the letter again and stuffed it back into the duffel bag, he was ready to go home.


The end

Hope you liked!