This is what happens when you watch three hours of The Mighty Boosh on youtube and then read RENT fan fiction.
By the way The Mighty Boosh is an amazing show that more people in the US should know about.
But sadly the BBC only has DVD's of it for Region 2 (UK Pal) and I do not believe it is on BBC America, but you can watch it on Youtube though and you should check it out.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of it. RENT belongs to Jonathan Larson and The Mighty Boosh and the song "Love Games" belong to Julian Barratt and Noel Fielding.
Summery: Collins has a very weird dream involving Mark
"What's happening?" Collins asked waking up
"I'm Old Mark" Mark in a tutu popped out of a random corner
"What?" He sat up having a confused look on his face.
"I'm Old Mark"
"Where am I?" He looked around at what looked like the loft although it was wet, slimy and had more dirt
"Mark's place" He smiled slyly he had a sparkly jacket on too…okay this was getting weird; it was beginning to scare Collins. "Let me get you a drink, you like stoli?"
Collins got up and followed mark who poured him a glass of stoli, and he took a sip.
"You like old Mark's place, I've got everything that's nice"
"Uh, Yeah it's nice….this the way out….I mean I should be going you know I've got people to see and weed to smoke"
"Why you going? We have everything we need here…we have everything we need we have Stoli, and everything we need…let me get you another Stoli"
"I make films…..see" He held up canisters "This is one I like to call old Mark" He held up one that contained film "And this one is of Stoli" He held another one up.
"That's nice but I really should be going"
"Maybe we can make a film together"
"Not right now Mark"
Collins tried to be pleasant "Because…I have places to be, you know Tom Collins vagabond anarchist, NYU Professor" He began to walk away
"Do you love me?" Mark asked
Collins stopped "Oh shit" he mumbled
"Do you love me?" He asked again
Collins turned around "I am just gonna pretend I never heard that, Mark"
"Do you think you could ever love me?" Damn he was persistent.
"Uh…that's not how it works"
"How does it work?"
"Well, you know you meet someone gets to know them, go on a few dates and then bam….I don't know you Mark"
"Yes you do…what about to boat times"
Okay now Collins remembered vaguely how he got here…mainly he remembered fishing in this lake in upstate New York…it was peaceful till this guy, Old Mark, got caught on his line. Next thing he knew this guy was showing him is Mangina.
"That was more of an exposure"
"That was that first date you saw my downstairs mix up"
"Yeah and I did not ask to see that now did I?"
"You do love me"
"No I don't"
"You do love me"
"No I don't"
"You do love me and you've seen me and you know who I am, I'm old Mark"
Collins was getting irate now all he wanted was to go home and be with Angel "Yeah I heard you the first hundred times you told me. I don't love you, in fact I think you're a pathetic little albino freak, why don't you deal with that"
"Maybe I will deal with it, just like a dealt with Roger" He pointed at the rocker who was hung on a piece of wood like a fish over the door
Okay seeing that changed Collins' mind but quickly. "You know what Mark….maybe I was being to judgmental" He faked a smile "Maybe in this light with the tutu and the glasses, maybe I could love you. Maybe I was lying" He went on "Because when you love someone sometimes you say you don't because you're playing hard to get, just playing a game"
"Games?" He was buying it.
"Yeah, Mark, I was just playing a game with you"
"That's right, Mark, I was just playing love games"
Suddenly this techno music started in the background "Love Games" Mark said as disco lights started over head.
"Do you love me; are you playing your love games with me? I Just wanna know what to do because I need your loving a lot c'mon now" This whole thing has reached a new level of weird "Do you love me, are you playing your love games with me? I just wanna know what to do because I need you're loving a lot c'mon now"
Collins couldn't stop himself from singing in an octave he didn't know he could reach. "Moving too fast, this isn't a race, ooh, baby back off and lower the pace now, slow it down, and give me some space, mmmh, moving too fast, this isn't a race. ah ah"
They were dancing now, and Mark began to sing again "Do you love me? Are you playing your love games with me? I just wanna know what to do 'cause I need your love a lot c'mon now"
"Moving too fast this isn't a race ooooh, will you back off and lower the pace now? Slow it down, and give me some place. Moving too fast this isn't a race."
"I'm old Mark" He said yet again.
Collins couldn't help but roll my eyes "I know, I think you said"
"Come on don't make me beg now, 'cause I'm not your regular guy, don't be shy, do you love me?"
That was when Collins woke up. He sat straight up in bed "Omigod" He was sweating a little; he looked over to the spot next to him on the mattress. It was occupied by a sleeping Angel Schunard. He sighed relieved "Okay that is the last time I eat cold pepperoni pizza before bed" He laid his head back down on the pillow and drifted back to sleep.