This is the last chapter in what just started out to be a study in TIVA smut but became something a little different. It kept wanting to become a love story. I think I have tamed that part a little but it still grew into more relationship than smut for a good part of the time. The problem Ziva is suffering from is called cystitis or honeymoonitis because it often happens to women on their honeymoon when lovemaking seems almost constant. Ah…fond memories.
Thanks to all who reviewed and said they enjoyed it. It was a great ego boost and it is a pleasure to give others pleasure, as always.
I do not own NCIS or any part thereof…
BATTLE OF THE SEXES
--Late Sunday Evening or Love Hurts--
Tony sat on the bed, back against the wall and legs spread out before him. He heard the shower running again and although he had the urge to get up and join her he just didn't have the strength. What was that old saying; "the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak?" Well, weak described him to a "T."
He looked down at Little Tony laying small and weak between his legs in his new hairless nest. The poor little guy looked like he'd been in a war. There were raw-looking places on the shaft and the tip was red and swollen looking only not in a good way.
He had hickeys in places that wouldn't show and hickeys in places that would show. He was going to have to wear a turtleneck to work for a week. And he sure as hell couldn't change his shirts at his desk as he usually did. All it needed was for McGeek to see his newly shorn status and he would never live it down. Or Gibbs. He shuddered just thinking what Gibbs might do. And it had already itched! Ziva could be truly evil.
He had scratch marks on his back and they stung. But he loved them just the same. His jaw hurt from so much time south of the border. He had rug burns on his knees. He grinned. That had been something. A wrestling match had turned passionate. Of course it had; wrestling nude with Ziva could only lead to one thing. He'd made love to her doggy style on the floor of the bedroom. She apparently liked that position a lot. She orgasmed 3 or 4 times before poor Little Tony had finally managed to pull off a big finish. Then they'd both collapsed and tried to catch their breath. When they'd finally untangled and sat up side by side each had noticed the other's damaged knees and had burst out laughing at the same time. She had hugged and kissed him and then stood and helped him up.
She had helped him up! Maybe she was right? Maybe men just weren't cut out to go the distance? Nah, he couldn't believe that. He thought back over the past 36 hours or so; how many times had he popped the big one? He started counting off on his fingers…the bed, the bed, the bathroom, the couch, the coffee table, the shower, the bed again, up against the wall and damn that had been hard on his low back - how the hell had James Caan done it in THE GODFATHER? How many was that eight? He resumed counting; the bed, the bed, the dresser in the bedroom. He looked over at all the crap they'd knocked off the dresser. They had spilt, dropped, tossed, and just generally thrown everything movable in this hotel room onto the floor including almost a whole cart load of food. They were going to have to leave a big tip for the maid.
That reminded him he was hungry. He resolved he would suggest they go out and get something to eat. He needed a break to regain his strength but he wouldn't tell Ziva that. They'd eaten all the power bars and apples and drunk all the wine and now the fridge was empty except for a couple of water bottles. Good, hot sex sure worked up an appetite. He scratched at his lower belly. Damn, he was itching.
Ziva got slowly out of the tub. She ached all over. She looked at herself in the mirror. There were bruises on her hips and upper thighs and stomach. She knew there were bruises on her buttocks as well. There were love bites around her nipples and inner thighs. There was an enormous love bite on the right side of her neck. There wasn't enough makeup in the world to cover that. She'd have to wear high collars and let her hair down for a week at least.
She put both hands down to cup her groin. It felt so hot and swollen and not in a sexy way but in a painful way. And every time she peed it burnt. She wondered if using a condom would have helped that any? They never did use any of them. She thought she might give them all to Tony. Right now, she didn't care if she ever had sex again.
Her knees were raw from their last time on the floor. A wild ride that one. She hadn't thought she could have another orgasm but Tony had brought her 3, maybe 4 times. She couldn't even scream anymore. She just moaned a lot now. She moaned at the thought of moaning.
She reached for a towel and her thighs hurt and her shoulders hurt. Her jaw was sore. Her throat was sore. Tony was big. He had punished her mouth and throat unintentionally in his lust and she hadn't minded it then, in fact had reveled in it, but now she suffered.
She dried her hair and listened to her stomach growl. Maybe they should get something to eat. And maybe she should apologize to Tony because right now, if he said he wanted to have sex again, she just might kill him. If she could work up the energy that is.
She wrapped the towel around her body and opened the door and jerked back. Tony was standing there, right there, as she opened the door. He was lucky she was so tired and sore or he'd be on the floor in a death grip. He had that goofy, wild-eyed look he got when she threatened him that she loved although she'd never tell him.
He'd gone to the bathroom door just to ask her if she wanted to get something to eat and she'd opened it in his face. He'd seen the way her eyes had widened in surprise and he steeled himself to be at least gut-punched but she had only stepped back. She must be tired too. She had dark circles around her eyes and a huge hickey on her neck. Uh-oh.
"Hey," he said.
She looked at him inquiringly?
"So, I'm starving. You wanna get dressed and go get something to eat?"
She smiled. She looked tired and pale once again but when she smiled she was so beautiful. He blinked. She was beautiful. She was Ziva and she was his partner and she was so beautiful.
"I am starving too, Tony. I am all for that idea."
They both rummaged around and put on their "Monday" work clothes. Tony noticed that Ziva moved slowly and seemed to be grimacing in pain from time to time, especially as she pulled up her cargo pants and zipped them.
Ziva saw the scratch marks on Tony's back and bit her lips. She rarely got so involved in sex she let go enough to be fierce with her partner. Tony brought it out in her. She smiled. He was a fierce lover too and she had the bruises to prove it. She also noticed him scratching at his chest. She smiled a secret smile at that. He'd be scratching for days. It paid to think ahead.
Tony finished dressing and looked around for his wallet and cell phone. He didn't see them.
"Ziva, have you seen my phone and wallet? I thought they were here."
She thought for a moment as she reached behind her and fastened her bra. Tony watched. This particular maneuver had always fascinated him.
"I think they were actually on the bar the last time I saw them."
Tony smiled his thanks and resisting the urge to pop her bra strap walked into the living room area and looked behind the bar. She was right. There was his wallet and his phone - missing the battery. Crap. He got down on his hands and knees, which hurt like hell, and felt around for the battery. He found it and sat back, legs out straight. Damn, his knees hurt and it looked like they'd started oozing blood again from the stains now starting to appear. He pushed his battery back in and started the phone up. As soon as possible he checked the listing of calls.
"Ziva, we are so fucked!" he yelled and got up awkwardly, trying not to bend his knees.
"The battery was out of my phone and it looks like McGee has been trying to call me for the past 30 minutes! Where's your phone?"
They couldn't find her little purse for a few minutes but when they did they found that McGee had tried her several times too. She had 4 messages on her phone and Tony had 6 on his.
Tony pressed his speed dial for Tim, all the time looking at Ziva. She looked as tired as he felt.
McGee answered on the second ring.
"Where the hell have you been, Tony? The boss is on a rampage because I couldn't get you or Ziva!"
"Sorry, McProbie, the battery had come out of my phone and…"
"I DON'T CARE, TONY. Get Ziva and haul your asses to Georgetown. We got a Marine down with an antique Florentine dagger in the middle of his head and …"
"Calm down. I'll get Ziva and we'll be there in 15. Send me the address."
He looked at Ziva and smiled. She smiled back and then turned to pack her bag. He kept smiling then realized it and shook his head. He was dithering. Ziva was already packing up her stuff. He went to do the same.
Because he had to check out, she left first and beat him to the crime scene by a few minutes. He saw her Mini-Cooper parked sideways on the sidewalk. Local LEOs were all over and Tony had to show his badge half a dozen times before he found Gibbs, McGee and Ziva. He noticed she now had wet-looking stains at the knees of her pants too. Damn, he was going to have to start taking bandages with him.
Gibbs wasn't talking to him or Ziva, giving all his orders through Tim. Tony sighed. It was going to be a long night.
--0630 Monday Morning or Love Hurts Even More the Second Day--
Ziva slowly lowered herself into her desk chair. Closing her eyes against the pain. She definitely had to call her gynecologist today. She would not be able to continue working like this much longer. She set her backpack carefully down on the floor and removed her gun and holster, storing them in her desk drawer. If she didn't move too fast she was basically okay.
Tony and McGee came in just a minute or two later. Tony slung his backpack into the corner of his cubicle and walked stiff-legged to his desk, sitting down nice and easy, scratching.
McGee looked at them both as he put his own backpack down. They both looked like crap. And weirdly they had both kept their jackets on with the collars turned up throughout the night at the scene even though it was pretty warm in the room where they'd found the dead guy. He thought he'd seen a bruise on the side of Ziva's neck when her hair had fallen away from her face but he wasn't sure.
He opened up his e-mail and sent them both the same message.
"So who won? Who gets the money?"
Ziva turned to look at Tony and then she looked at McGee.
She typed, "He does. End of story."
Tony propped his chin on his hand as he read McGee's e-mail.
He typed, "She did. And don't ask me again."
Gibbs walked up just then, straight to McGee's desk.
"Well?" he said.
Tim took out his wallet and removed a fifty dollar bill and gave it to him.
Gibbs smiled his little smile and said "Remember this lesson, McGee. It'll come in handy when you get married someday a time or two."
Gibbs turned and looked hard at DiNozzo and then hard at David. Both of them looked like they'd been rode hard and put up wet. He smiled again. Probably a pretty good approximation of what had actually occurred.
"DiNozzo, David, with me," he barked.
He led them to his elevator office, noticing both of them walking slowly and carefully. He had a grin on his face until he turned around to face them.
Gibbs pushed a button and then pressed the emergency stop after only a few seconds.
"I don't care what you were doing but you'd better have your damned cell phones on at all times. Do I make myself clear?"
They both nodded.
"Yes, Gibbs," Ziva said in a small voice.
"Right, boss, I know that. It's just that the battery came ou…"
Gibbs slapped Tony on the head.
"Shut up, DiNozzo."
"Shutting up, Boss."
Neither one of them would look him in the eyes. He reached over to Ziva and pushed her hair back from her face and bent her collar down. She had an enormous hickey on the right side of her neck and what looked like another down where he could see her collarbone through the open neck of her shirt. He let her hair fall back. He noticed her lips looked bruised and swollen.
He turned to Tony and reached out and pushed his collar down. His senior field agent had several little hickeys ringing his neck and his lips looked swollen as well. He looked at the knees of Tony's pants which were dark and wet looking. He looked over at Ziva's knees and they had the same kind of stains. He shook his head.
"I do not care if you screw each other senseless but you will keep your phones on and you will be available, do you read me?"
looked at Ziva to find her looking at him. He widened his eyes at
her to indicate he too wanted to kill McGee.
Ziva felt her face turn hot and flushed. Having sex with Tony was one thing, but having sex with Tony and having Gibbs know about it was quite something different. She looked at Tony.
While they were looking at each other something happened. Tony felt happy. Really happy. Even though he was getting a reaming out by his boss he still felt happy. And it kinda seemed like he was happy because Ziva was there. He smiled at her.
Ziva saw Tony smile at her and even though she knew she shouldn't, knew Gibbs would notice she smiled back. He always made her smile.
Oh shit, thought Gibbs. Guess it's time to enforce rule 12.
He head slapped them both to get their attention and then started his lecture.
When he was finished with them he let them leave the elevator. He went on down to Autopsy to see if Ducky had anything yet on the marine with the dagger in his head.
Tony and Ziva both walked slowly to their desks, Tony glaring at McGee all the way. When he sat down he tried to scratch around his groin area without being too obvious.
Tim cleared his throat nervously.
"It wasn't my fault, Tony. He made me tell him and I lost fifty bucks because I bet on you! And I bet he's gone down to collect from Ducky and Abby, too. They both bet on Ziva."
Ziva opened her mouth and then closed it. Everyone knew of the stupid wager?! She was going to kill McGee. She pointed her finger at him and promised him a slow and painful death with her eyes and he looked scared, kind of cowering behind his computer screen. Then she thought better of it. Maybe she'd kill him later. Right now she was just too tired.
"Ducky bet on Ziva?" Tony said unbelievingly. How could he bet on Ziva? What a traitor to men everywhere. Wait a minute.
"Well, who did Gibbs bet on?"
"He said it would be a tie."
Ziva looked at Tony and he looked at her then he typed.
"Trust Gibbs to know everything beforehand."
"Yes. It is scary isn't it?" she typed back.
"A little but it just shows how well he knows us both."
Ziva smiled and nodded.
Then she typed, "Thank you Tony. Even though I can barely walk and I have been humiliated in front of my friends I thank you for a wonderful, wonderful weekend."
Tony smiled when he read his screen.
"Me too, Ziva. Even though I am itching like I got fleas and Little Tony may never full recover, it was a weekend to remember in so many ways."
"Partners?" Ziva wrote back.
They both looked up and smiled at each other again.
Gibbs watched them from the stairway and muttered "crap" under his breath as he walked on down the stairs.
"Quit sitting around. You got nothing to do I can give you something to do. And DiNozzo, stop that scratching!"