30 Random Words

Hi! And welcome to Whiskey Tango Foxtrot! I'd like to thank RabulaTasa for letting me use the title. This is going to be an Anthology of sorts of one-shots about how I think the Teen Titans Universe works and its possible future. OOH! And points to who can figure out the reference in Word 27!

1 Atheism

On the corner of a busy intersection of Jump City, a man stood on a soap box yelling at the top of his lungs at the passing masses, most of whom ignored him, while others stalled to listen to him with varying degrees of emotion to what he was saying.

"As you can see, the religious leaders of the world are nothing more than lying quacks! The Bible, the Quran and all those other tissues were invented by ignorant Neanderthals to explain what they were to dense to figure out themselves! There is not Heaven, there is no Hell, there is no God OR a Devil! And I've got forty grand to give to anyone who can prove me wrong on any of those points!"

He felt a tug on his jacket, and when he turned around he saw Raven of the Teen Titans, with a hand held out as though expecting something.

"Hi, I'm Raven. Where's my money?"

2 Overrides

Cyborg never told people how his computer mind worked. His prosthetics were built under a military contract for a combination Wounded Veterans Relief/Extreme Front Infantry Android. And as such, the computers were given a highly advance AI, to work out strategies in the field for its original purpose, or for maintaining vitals for highly crippled recipients, much like Cyborg was now.

The problem was, when he went into battle, he heard this voice. Telling him the most 'efficient' ways to complete a mission, trouble was, sometimes the voice said the most efficient way was to let his team get captured or even die. There were overrides in place to keep it in check, but sometimes cyborg wondered how long those overrides would be effective. Before the AI learned to override the overrides.

3 Lawyer

So here it was. Graduation. Tara had scholarships to half the Colleges and Universities in the country, and a few dozen abroad, and she had no idea what to do with her life. She could be a Geologist, but…no. No, she wasn't comfortable with any connection to…her. Then again, a career in the military would have great benefits in the civilian arena, but she hated conflict.

"In other news today, Justice Leaguer Booster Gold has come under a lawsuit by a collection of small companies for copyright infringement, and for damages in the result of his epic battle last week…"

Then again, a Meta-Human Defense Attorney would be quite lucrative.

4 Stale

Beast Boy sat at the television playing Mega Monkeys V: The Return of Dr. Momo, when he heard the sound of someone sniffing above him. Looking up, he noticed Cyborg standing behind him with a disgusted look on his face.

"Dang, how long have you been wearing that uniform dawg?"

5 Rolled

Jinx stirred in her bed, and-after cursing at her alarm clock-languidly sat up in bed.

Only to find that her entire room was draped in toilet paper.

6 Contradiction

Pantha sat in the nude as she scoured the files and documents that littered her desk in her home, her fur still dripping from her shower. The yellow mask that normally hid her feline features lay discarded with her leotard. In one hand, she held the results of her recent confidential gene exam…

Matches: Rosabelle Mendez, 57

Along with her profile…

Name: Pantha; X-24

Age: Approx. 18

Country of Origin: Guatemala

It should have been a simple matter of looking up this "Rosabelle" and seeing if the numbers matched. It didn't.

Name: Rosabelle Mendez

Age: 25

Country of Origin: Montana, USA

Missing since April 9th, 1975. Found deceased near Montréal, Canada. September 12th, 1980

Pantha: 18, Mendez: 25. Pantha: Guatemala, Mendez: Montana, USA.

So many missing bits and conflicting information.

7 Cleared

Beast Boy looked at his now pale hands. The reflection of the glove dispenser showed a blonde haired blue eyed boy of fifteen. He turned to the doctor.

"So… You mean I'm cured?"

8 Ward

Every night Azar would place a special spell over the infant Raven's crib, to both protect her from and hide her from Trigon and his agents. It was a complex spell, which she alone would trust in putting in place, for the many other monks who knew it may use the opportunity to end the child's life. When one night she saw the ward already in place, she asked if anyone had entered the room in between her nightly bath and calming ritual and Azar entering the chambers. When none admitted to it, or volunteered information, Azar could conclude to one of two possibilities:

One, one of the other Monks did it for her and wished to be anonymous-unlikely- or two, that the baby, who was only seven months old, could be most proficient with magic, an almost certainty.

9 Graduates

When Jinx, Mammoth and Gizmo were sent back after graduating, the underclassmen laughed them to scorn.

Gizmo and Mammoth were able to laugh it off due to both there unease at the prospect of leaving the HIVE and lack of real motivation, but Jinx was mortified, and wouldn't leave her dorm room for almost a week. She was supposed to be better than this, right? Surely she could make something better of herself than merely a High School flunky.


10 Whiskey

"Cyborg?" Raven said, looking at the passed out Beast Boy and swaying Robin in the living room after the boys returned from a botched mission.

"Next time you and the others go on a mission to the West Virginian backcountry, and someone in overalls and a straw hat gives you a jug with X's on it when someone has a cold and says 'Take This', do us all a favor: Don't.

11 Galaxy

Beast Boy scratched his head in thought. "Hey Cyborg? If Superman can only fly just short the speed of light, then how can he go to the other side of the Galaxy and back in a matter of hours when it takes light 120,000 years to make the same trip one way?"

12 Advisors

As its ruler, Galfore swore to protect Tameran from all threats. Sadly, he forgot to consider the most heinous, most dangerous evil of them all: His advisors, and the bureaucratic interest groups that backed them.

13 Perception

After Robin's fateful trip to Tokyo with the other Titans, Batman was on the newly repaired view screen looking agitated.

"Robin, I believe we had the discussion about getting romantically involved with members of your team. It will cloud your judgment and put your mission in jeopardy."

Robin smiled smugly. "Oh really? Then what's this?" In response, he held up a Japanese edition of the Gotham Post, and on the front cover was a picture of Batman and Catwoman in a tight embrace sharing a passionate kiss. Well, Catwoman was, Batman seemed frozen in shock and surprise. Above the picture was the article title in Japanese text, which roughly translated to: Are Bat-Kittens in the future of Gotham's Rooftops?

14 Diet

After her embarrassingly botched mission with the new Wildebeest Society, Pantha swore to rebuild her body to be more agile and less bulky. She would take special karate classes and learn gymnastics. She was totally dedicated to not having to relive her embarrassment at being captured.

Though the food she would have to eat to lose the excess weight was beginning to seem like a greater evil than the Society itself.

15 Accompanied

Steel City was all a tingle about the new Jazz club opening down on Johns and Main. It was to have the hottest new musicians and bands every night, with a Retro Night dedicated to the classics of the genre. And for its grand opening, the club was to have the owner Herald recreating It Don't Mean a Thing by Ella Fitzgerald, accompanied by his girlfriend Bumble Bee on vocals.

16 Finger

Beast Boy would never forget Raven's first exposure to Earth's symbolic profanity.

The two of them were at a local store picking up some blankets and towels for their rooms at the new tower, when Raven asked one of the employees about some product that he had long forgotten (he's slept since then). In response, the teen just gave her the finger. Beast Boy was about to go off on the guy for being so rude, when Raven's face scrunched up in confusion and said something that had him rolling for a very long time: "….Yes, it's a very nice finger."

17 Confusion

When they got home, Beast Boy explained just what 'The Finger' meant here on earth. In response, Raven's face skewed up even more in confusion than it did in the store.

"But, it's a finger. A finger."

Looking back, Beast Boy figured that it was right then and there that he loved this introverted girl.

18 Fuel

Ever since he was little, Cyborg always loved the rumbling sound of a powerful engine. The purring as it coasted, the roar as it accelerated. And because of that love, he always made sure to get the biggest, most powerful engines commercially available for each incarnation of the T-Car, and then subsequently kicked it up a notch or eight.

But after he spent almost eighty dollars for half a tank, he went straight home and replaced the entire engine and gas tank with a battery, a power cell, and invented small wind turbines for the under carriage. And he never paid for gas again.

19 Last Request

After the dust settled, Pantha and Red Star stood up and examined the damage. They were chasing a suspect through an artificial cave deep under Moscow, when they triggered explosive in the walls that caused a cave-in. Fortunately they would live, but they were trapped hundreds of feet below ground.

"So… We're stuck here?"

"For the moment yes. We just have to wait for the rescue crews to dig us out."

"But for all we know they won't be able to before either our air runs out or we starve."


Pantha considered this for a moment and shrugged. "Well Ruskie, if we're gonna die we might as well have sex."

20 Pragmatic

When Batman sent him an e-mail containing protocols to take down each of the Titans should they turn on him, Robin was mad. But when he was building Red-X, a dark, secret corner of his mind thanked Bruce for them. And when Terra betrayed them, he cursed himself for deleting that file not a week earlier.

21 Respectable

What did it mean to be Respectable? Brain had often pondered over this question, often during his ethically questionable experiments on the Gorilla he had named Mallah, back when he was whole. The experiments raised the gorilla's IQ exponentially, and he gained an intelligently equal and friend, but he still doubted whether or not he had the right to play with such thing.

He most certainly respected the man and the work of his friend Niles Caulder, the wheelchair-bound Englishman. But then the same man destroyed his body and tried to make him the first Robotman, leaving only his brain alive. Had it not been for the quick work of his friend Mallah, he most certainly would have either died or been afflicted by the curse now occupied by Cliff Steele.

From the moment he regained consciousness and learned of his plight, the scientist took the name Brain, and declared his War on the 'respectable' men like Niles Caulder, everything they stood for, and all who stood by them.

22 Refined

"Excusez-moi manqué, mais vous êtes la femme la plus belle au monde." Raven looked up and was somewhat surprised that it was Beast Boy that addressed her, but even more so by his manner of dress, which was an immaculate tuxedo, a small bouquet of white and red roses in one hand, a bottle of a fine wine in the other. (scratch that, it was red grape juice.)

He spoke again, "Devez-vous me joindre pour un pique-nique en parc ?"

Now, Raven didn't know French, but she was able to pick out a few words here and there. "Beast Boy, what are you doing?"

"Vous m'avez souhaité pour être plus raffiné, non ?"

Raven sighed, regretting her heated remarks during a previous argument with a roll of her eyes. "Yes, but not at the sacrifice of you."

The next thing Raven knew was that she was being crushed in a rough bear hug.

23 Accounting

"Hey BB.."

"Yeah Cy?"

"You ever wonder what you'll do when you don't want to be a superhero anymore?"

"Not really."

"Well I do, and I can't think of anything! I'll admit, that scares me sometimes…"

"…I got it! With all your computer implants, you could be an accountant!"

"…That ain't funny man."

24 Curly

"So Hotspot, what do you think of my 'air?"

Hotspot looked up from his crossword to see Argent, with all her hair up in a mass of ebony curls, with a lock of spiraled red falling over her lift eye. Gawking, the poor boy could think of only one way to describe it.


25 Tango

Beast Boy ran over to Raven, looking very much like the proverbial kid in a candy story.

"Raven!" He called, a rose in hand, "Let's Tango!"

She merely gazed at him for a moment before returning to her book. "Let's not."

Undaunted, Beast Boy continued, putting the flower in his mouth, "Ah come on! You know ya wann-" until he halted with a silent squeal of pain.

Raven never looked up. "Let me guess, thorns."

26 Nosebleed

After the Brotherhood was defeated, Robin, Bumble Bee, and the rest of the Titans decided to get together at least once a year for a night of fun, which quickly turned into a Karaoke party. When it started, Robin didn't see anything wrong with it, until Beast Boy started singing The Bad Touch. Halfway through the first verse Robin was out of his seat and walking over to the machine to unplug it, when Cyborg stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. It was then he noticed everyone laughing: Pantha appeared to be close to tears under her mask, Wildebeest was slamming the table he sat at, Bumble Bee was in the middle of a gut-buster(despite nearly chocking on her water), Melvin was giggling behind her hands while her brothers were asleep, and that it seemed Beast Boy had Raven what could only be described as trapped in her seat as he belted the chorus:

"You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals! / so let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel!"

Who knew girls could nosebleed like that?

27 Foxtrot

It was Christmas at the tower, and gifts were being exchanged. Cyborg opened his from Beast Boy and took a look of confusion.

It appeared to be a calculator, but it only had three buttons: a 1, a 0, and an Enter button.

"BB, what is this?"

"Isn't it obvious? It's a Binary Calculator!."

28 Prevention

Pantha stared slack-jawed at the doctor, it was almost three months since she and Red Star were able to escape from the cave-in, thanks to the Moscow Emergency Response teams, and she had been feeling a bit under the weather recently. It took some urging from the other Titans, but when Wildebeest threw his lot in as well she finally decided to see a doctor. …She never dreamed this would be the cause.

"……What do ya mean I'm pregnant?!"

29 Nickname

"I don't know which is worse about the name 'Garfield', the name itself, or its nickname 'Gar.'"

30 Stayed

After Starfire disappeared with Warp, the Titans tried to keep together, but without to bubbly positivity of the alien, it just wasn't the same.

Looking over everything now, Cyborg couldn't tell which about his current state was: That he was so decrepit, or that he stayed at the tower at all.